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| Topic: one night stand | |
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my intentions were clear I made my point known that I wasn't looking" to have fun" I wasn't out "for a good time ". but all I asked was for closure that's the whole reason I felt I couldn't open up because my last relationship of 6 years she left me and I never got closure is this what my life is gonna b like if it is id rather b alone
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I'm not ok w it... I mean the thing is I thought we had something I've heard that said in a lot of movies. Truth is though, all you both had was an exchange of bodily fluids. Was it sympathy sex? Or just "I want you now and can't wait to rip your clothes off" sex? Either way, she wasn't interested enough to stay. I can only give out so much sympathy. One day you'll get over it. We all do. She's already moved on, so why bother worrying about it? Yes your mother may have raised you to treat women with respect, but a LOT of people say that. Even one's who treat their next lover like crap, because seeming too nice must win prizes. Not everyone will trust straight away, which makes sense. So try not to sound overly-nice. Just saying, it makes some suspicious if you seem TOO nice. Maybe balance that out a bit. I think ur wrong I shouldn't have to balance anything if I'm to nice for u im sorry but when I find the rt woman she will love me for me not the jerk im pretend to b |
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The world is changing for the worse and I refuse to let it change who I am and how open hearted I am
my grandmother taught me if ur hungry come eat if ur tired rest ur head there r ppl w less so share what u have and in ur time of need god will provide that's my belief yeah I jumped in the sack w her but that was after several attempts at saying no... I was lonely and it seemed like she wanted more than just a roll in the hey |
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Edited by
Josei87
on
Thu 11/21/13 08:12 PM
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I just wanted closure was I to nice to affectionate or just a ****??? that's all I was asking for but I didn't even get that.. :( it's true what they say nice guys finish last...
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That is why it is smart to keep your britches up until you have an better idea weather something is going to use you for a one night stand. No one knows someone well enough in one or a few dates to know what their character is. Yes a hard lesson learned but hardly something anyone over 18 should not be able to comprehend. You take the risk this is the result way more often than anything else.  Good advice.
I would like to add that men have been doing this to vulnerable women for years. Also, what irks me is if a man takes you out once or twice, I have known some who will suddenly think they own you or that you are engaged or exclusive when that agreement has never been made. Don't assume things like that. Talk about it. This is reality and we are grown ups. .. I know WOMEN that are PREDATORS.. For Christ's sake, stop with this "poor vulnerable women" thing already. Women can be filthier, meanier, and more violent & aggressive than men. To prove what I'm saying search your local women incarceration statistics database and have a good look at the reasons why women are in jails... Paedophilia/murder... You name it... If you would read my words as they are written you would not misunderstand them. Yes there are evil men and women. I never said otherwise. My advice is to learn to avoid evil people. Look for true goodness and love. Project true goodness and love, and you will learn to recognize it easier. Listen to your inner voice when it tells you something is not quite right with this person. Pay attention. |
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Not to be rude, but you got closure when she refused to speak to you again. It might not be the sort you want, but it is what it is. You felt something, she didn't. You wanted a relationship, she didn't. Maybe at one time she did and she changed her mind. It happens. I've had guys do the same thing to me, and yeah it hurts, but you can't let it ruin your life. There are other women in the world.
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Edited by
Sexypierced
on
Thu 11/21/13 10:44 PM
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I read them the way you wrote them... The same "old" redundant tendency to put Men at stake because of "low-life" S-ol's that most of the time were/are repeating the same pattern they've been treated during their own childhood. I would have written something similar to your comment but the way around, I would have had already been judged & put in jail. The same logic goes with racism and anti-Semitism. Everything is fine when it's going one way but turns out to be a huge problem when it's the opposite. It's all a "game" to promote & lead the masses in a certain way. The same goes for homosexuality & feminism.. if you understand the "rules" then the "game" becomes crystal clear. I don't have any trouble with attention, as the evil resides in the details, I can be really evil-ISH when it comes to them. By the way, talking about details, have a closer look to your last comment: Yes, there are Evil men & women. You are wrong again: There are Evil men & EVIL women. But hey, I like you too ;)
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Edited by
Sexypierced
on
Thu 11/21/13 11:08 PM
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my intentions were clear I made my point known that I wasn't looking" to have fun" I wasn't out "for a good time ". but all I asked was for closure that's the whole reason I felt I couldn't open up because my last relationship of 6 years she left me and I never got closure is this what my life is gonna b like if it is id rather b alone HERE YOU GO! You told her you wasn't interested in a one night-stand? = She tested your manhood... This was the Competition... & the Reward for her. She tested if you could stand your position and deserve HER respect. You failed, she wins, you lost. Get over it & find a better Woman with a capital W. ;) PS: nothing impeaches you to be a Man, standing as one & sticking to his goals/rules & promises, and to be nice. They are not incompatible. Just don't be a nice little MELLOW "puppy" who is waiting for "his mummy" to tell him what to do next in his life & pulling on her pants. Got the point? BE.. A... LEADER! Don't ask, DO! DON'T WAIT, GO & TAKE! ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR MISTAKES BUT NEVER APOLOGIZE. Learn to let go. Don't harass women with phone calls & texts.. Like music.. Enjoy the silences. She will get back to you faster than a lightning bolt. PS 2: Regards towards your Grandma. Seems a very nice Soul. |
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Amen to the idea that gender does not determine who is the bad seed in situations. I have seen barely 5' little she-devils slice and dice guys that were gigantic Teddy Bears three ways to Sunday and I have seen guys that had it all and still thought it entitled them to bully their wives and kids in ways that put Hitler to shame. When people come on here carrying on how someone did them wrong I take it with a healthy dose of doubt. No matter how you tell something there is two sides and then the truth. Thank You PacificStar. A :* was blown Your way. |
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A woman will NEVER get aroused/interested by a "nice" guy. It's simply not that way in real life.. but Hollywood. If you've heard otherwise, then those people are to blame because they lied to you. I beg to differ. My exes have all been "nice guys" to start (which is what attracted me. When they ceased to be "nice guys", I lost interest. He takes decisions and DON'T ask for approval. He knows what's best and again he DOESN'T ask for approval. He makes the first step to a Woman and all the following ones. He doesn't buy drinks nor flowers nor pay the bill for the restaurant at the first date or at the club/discotheque during the weekend.
If you do otherwise, the woman will discard you because deep inside she doesn't feel respect for you, just pity.. And pity is a BIG turn off for a woman. Is this really the advice you're giving to another guy? You're definitely someone I wouldn't want to be with. As an independent, modern woman, I do like to feel I can take care of myself. But I do love it when a man OFFERS to do something because he wants to. Not because society tells him that's the way it should be, but because it's what he wants to, when he wants to/is able to. I may not always accept it, but I'll certainly appreciate it. With my last ex, it became a game to see who'd pick up the bill before the other noticed. I've never wanted to be someone who took advantage of a nice guy, so it was a mutual plan to essentially take turns treating each other. You must NOT tell her all your life.. Keep some mystery.. Let her understand that she hasn't deserved all the good "treat" right away... She must "work" for it.. She a "stranger" and you may say your mom told you "that you should never tell a stranger all your life" ;)
I can understand not telling strangers things like that, but a functioning, healthy relationship should be one where a person feels secure, not f*cked about. Unfortunately, as you didn't know at the time, you let this woman LEAD you to her place. This meant for her that you didn't PLAN anything. You should have had a plan already, knowing that "your place was a mess", which also translates her your mindset & how you "take care of yourself as a MAN" and what kind of "future" she may have besides you (cleaning lady?) ;).
I wouldn't call a guy like that back! |
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Wow I am sorry to say this but the women seem worse then the men on here. The women are like, MAN UP IT WAS JUST A ONE NIGHT STAND AND GET OVER IT. REALLY? I AM SHOCKED THAT WOMEN WOULD EVEN SAY THAT! Am I the strange one here or are he other women? I guess maybe its because I have never done the one night stand thing and I don't know if I could, I would think the women would be thinking this man is a sweetie.
If the table was turned and he was a woman and a man dumped her after saying that he wanted more..I think the women would be saying OMG DO YOU REALLY WANT AN ARSE LIKE THAT IN YOUR LIFE!! I guess that just goes to show you that their really is a double standard still going on out there!! |
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I'm ok with it and enjoy it .
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A woman will NEVER get aroused/interested by a "nice" guy. It's simply not that way in real life.. but Hollywood. If you've heard otherwise, then those people are to blame because they lied to you. I beg to differ. My exes have all been "nice guys" to start (which is what attracted me. When they ceased to be "nice guys", I lost interest. DEFINE WHAT YOU'RE CALLING A NICE GUY. He takes decisions and DON'T ask for approval. He knows what's best and again he DOESN'T ask for approval. He makes the first step to a Woman and all the following ones. He doesn't buy drinks nor flowers nor pay the bill for the restaurant at the first date or at the club/discotheque during the weekend.
If you do otherwise, the woman will discard you because deep inside she doesn't feel respect for you, just pity.. And pity is a BIG turn off for a woman. Is this really the advice you're giving to another guy? ON THE FIRST DATE: ABSOLUTELY! THERE ARE WOMEN TAKING ADVANTAGE OF SO CALLED "NICE GUY", BUT IN TRUTH, THEY THINK THEY'RE JERKS TO BE EXPLOITED. You're definitely someone I wouldn't want to be with. YOU ARE TOO FAR AWAY FROM ME, LOVE, ANYWAY... ;) As an independent, modern woman, I do like to feel I can take care of myself. AND THAT'S VERY GOOD, I'M NOT SAYING NOT THINKING OTHERWISE. BUT I DON'T THINK YOU WOULD BE IN A RELATIONSHIP WHERE THE GUY IS CALLING YOU EVERY 2 SECONDS & TEXTING TO YOU THE OTHER ONE. RELATIONSHIP DOESN'T MEAN PRISON. But I do love it when a man OFFERS to do something because he wants to. THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I EXPLAINED EARLIER = THE GUY MUST LEAD & HAVE PLANS. Not because society tells him that's the way it should be, but because it's what he wants to, when he wants to/is able to. I may not always accept it, but I'll certainly appreciate it. With my last ex, it became a game to see who'd pick up the bill before the other noticed. I've never wanted to be someone who took advantage of a nice guy, so it was a mutual plan to essentially take turns treating each other. AND THAT'S HOW IT SHOULD WORK IN A RELATIONSHIP.. I WAS TALKING ABOUT THE VERY FIRST DATE.. WHERE 2 STRANGERS TO EACH OTHER MEET. You must NOT tell her all your life.. Keep some mystery.. Let her understand that she hasn't deserved all the good "treat" right away... She must "work" for it.. She a "stranger" and you may say your mom told you "that you should never tell a stranger all your life" ;)
I can understand not telling strangers things like that, but a functioning, healthy relationship should be one where a person feels secure, not f*cked about. AGAIN, I WAS TALKING ABOUT THE FIRST DATE. Unfortunately, as you didn't know at the time, you let this woman LEAD you to her place. This meant for her that you didn't PLAN anything. You should have had a plan already, knowing that "your place was a mess", which also translates her your mindset & how you "take care of yourself as a MAN" and what kind of "future" she may have besides you (cleaning lady?) ;).
I wouldn't call a guy like that back! FINALLY, WE OPENLY AGREED ON SOMETHING MUTUAL. A :* FOR YOU. YOU SEEMS A NICE LOOKING & EQUILIBRATED WOMAN.. WHAT WITH YOUR EXS.. WHY IT DIDN'T WORK..? |
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Wow I am sorry to say this but the women seem worse then the men on here. The women are like, MAN UP IT WAS JUST A ONE NIGHT STAND AND GET OVER IT. REALLY? I AM SHOCKED THAT WOMEN WOULD EVEN SAY THAT! Am I the strange one here or are he other women? I guess maybe its because I have never done the one night stand thing and I don't know if I could, IT'S A "GENERAL" FANTASY IN ALMOST ALL WOMEN I'VE BEEN TALKING TO. TECHNICALLY, YOU CAN ;) I would think the women would be thinking this man is a sweetie. If the table was turned and he was a woman and a man dumped her after saying that he wanted more..I think the women would be saying OMG DO YOU REALLY WANT AN ARSE LIKE THAT IN YOUR LIFE!! I guess that just goes to show you that their really is a double standard still going on out there!! IT NEVER STOPPED BEING OUT THERE... ;) |
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OP, All I was really saying is don't be a doormat. Maybe I worded it wrong, which I l can only apologize for.
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From what I get from the opening statement is the op is left wanting more after one hell of a night. Its sucks that he can't get it, it happens. I'm not saying one night stands are great but you need to take them for what they are. A memory. Attaching feelings after one night is what will cause the most heartache and keep an otherwise awesome memory in the wrong file storage in our brain.
It can also be a case of too much to fast for her. There is another person in the scenario. If she got hints that your trying to wife her after the first night she may think your a little scary. Did you blow up her phone? Sometime women need time to breath too to let things sink in. Showing how impatient a person can be may be what turned her off or frightened her away to the point she doesn't want to make any further contact. |
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Amen to the idea that gender does not determine who is the bad seed in situations. I have seen barely 5' little she-devils slice and dice guys that were gigantic Teddy Bears three ways to Sunday and I have seen guys that had it all and still thought it entitled them to bully their wives and kids in ways that put Hitler to shame. When people come on here carrying on how someone did them wrong I take it with a healthy dose of doubt. No matter how you tell something there is two sides and then the truth. Thank You PacificStar. A :* was blown Your way. and just who do you think you are to come on here and grade people. If "getting over it " is fine for you then do that (starting with getting over yourself maybe? lol) just messing with ya there, but seriously we're adults here. we don't need grades from you. in my observaton, men hit and quit more often than women do. either way, it's wrong. testing others is immature blahshyte and yes there are some PEOPLE out there who could have a permanent set of horns....totally agree. |
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Amen to the idea that gender does not determine who is the bad seed in situations. I have seen barely 5' little she-devils slice and dice guys that were gigantic Teddy Bears three ways to Sunday and I have seen guys that had it all and still thought it entitled them to bully their wives and kids in ways that put Hitler to shame. When people come on here carrying on how someone did them wrong I take it with a healthy dose of doubt. No matter how you tell something there is two sides and then the truth. Thank You PacificStar. A :* was blown Your way. and just who do you think you are to come on here and grade people. If "getting over it " is fine for you then do that (starting with getting over yourself maybe? lol) just messing with ya there, but seriously we're adults here. we don't need grades from you. in my observaton, men hit and quit more often than women do. either way, it's wrong. testing others is immature blahshyte and yes there are some PEOPLE out there who could have a permanent set of horns....totally agree. Was this comment destined to me? Not clear. |
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Amen to the idea that gender does not determine who is the bad seed in situations. I have seen barely 5' little she-devils slice and dice guys that were gigantic Teddy Bears three ways to Sunday and I have seen guys that had it all and still thought it entitled them to bully their wives and kids in ways that put Hitler to shame. When people come on here carrying on how someone did them wrong I take it with a healthy dose of doubt. No matter how you tell something there is two sides and then the truth. Thank You PacificStar. A :* was blown Your way. and just who do you think you are to come on here and grade people. If "getting over it " is fine for you then do that (starting with getting over yourself maybe? lol) just messing with ya there, but seriously we're adults here. we don't need grades from you. in my observaton, men hit and quit more often than women do. either way, it's wrong. testing others is immature blahshyte and yes there are some PEOPLE out there who could have a permanent set of horns....totally agree. Was this comment destined to me? Not clear. comments are generally directed here at the last person quoted abaove |
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Edited by
2KidsMom
on
Fri 11/22/13 06:50 AM
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Are my horns showing
 <<<<JK
Ha ha Morning peeps....Happy Freaky Friday 
Enjoying the topic.
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