I have never been married, in my 50's now, and yeah I was that guy with the attractive woman on my arm that my married friends envied, funny thing though and I have heard this from both men and women that I was lucky to have never having to experience all the stress of marriage and kids, we all make lifestyle choices, not that there were never any opportunities for marriage, I had many, was considered a real catch in my younger days, by the way single in your 30's is not creepy, still plenty of time to marry.

Then there is the old saying about finding love and loss, this was my case, because of my own stupidity I lost the one woman that I loved, my soul mate, maybe some of us are only capable of love only once in a lifetime.

Lets try this again; its hard to get married if you can't even get a date because of your looks. You may think I am not unattractive but the guys do think that. What can I tell you. To each his own.

I'd worry more about someone who was married and divorced more than once than a guy who has never been married.

Divorce shows they were not able to stay married for whatever reason. That isn't necessarily a good thing. It doesn't prove anything about effort.

Real. I just heard about a fast-riser E-8 getting ready to retire who has never ever been married. My feelings were a mix of awe, empathy, sorrow, curiosity, and a tidbit of jealousy.

His rationale: He didn't want to put his wife/kids through the "military lifestyle" of being alone for months and months, he was able to focus 110% on his career, AND he didn't want (potentially) half-his-$hit going to a marital mistake for the rest of his life.

I really feel the latter (sigh) - but thank goodness for my seeds!

I'm 34 and I've never been married. I don't have kids, either. I've been asked by many what's wrong with me since I haven't been married/divorced already. These questions of course are coming from those who have been divorced at least once.

Now, I don't have a problem dating someone who is divorced, but I would be wary of those who are my age and divorced more than once. The never been married ones don't worry me much.

I have met many retired older guys who are NOW looking to start a family after a life time of throwing themselves into working and living "the good bachelor life". They see me as a last ditch effort to have kids. I can't have kids but I have had some say they would not mind adopting if I would raise them for them. They have sent me pictures of their beautiful houses and told me they would take care of me, etc. I am just not interested.

Omg, I can't believe how nasty some men really are. There was no need for them to tell you that. Sounds to me like they were too far up their own ***. I don't mind if people say it as a joke, but those men just sound like they want a trophy wife. They obviously held themselves in high authority huh? I'd soon send him on his way, if he thought he was too good for me. Anyway, give it a couple of years, and their plastic surgery faces will end up melting in the sun.

You keep speaking in the past tense, and talking about guys you met in high school. Sister, high school was a long time ago for both of us, so maybe it's time to try again? Guys in your age group are going to be, what, fortyish? Trust me, they've matured, or at least most of them have. They're not going to be out for "a prettier girl" and in any case, you're not a girl anymore -- you're a WOMAN. That's what truly adult men want.

I've seen your photos on here, and you're an attractive person. Neither you or I are ever going to be on the cover of Cosmo (and who'd really want to be on that shallow rag?) but BOTH of us are perfectly capable of attracting a guy's attention. And the really QUALITY men give bonus points for intellect and the ability to carry on an interesting conversation, something I know that you can do with ease.

Don't look back; look forward.

Well... same with women, I think. Heck, I'm divorced, and I made the effort. So to me, being divorced means a person was once married, and that tells me they at least MADE a commitment at some point in their lives.

Not to say those who were never married didn't commit or can't commit, of course.

Some people get married for the right reasons and some for the wrong.

Some people get divorced for the right reasons and some for the wrong.

There is no blanket statement.

It takes courage to commit yourself to someone. It also takes courage to walk away when it goes bad. Staying in a toxic situation because it is known is not courageous. It's just lazy and leads to bad things. When I divorced my husband, i was told I was a fool for walking away from an easy life and money. I said that staying married for money was as dumb as marrying for money in the first place. I married him because I loved him. He was broke when I met him. Part of the reason we are still friends is because I knew him when he was nothing.

There are many people who have been in relationships without being married. So no, being married and divorced does not prove anything. It shows that you married someone who was not right for you and that you were not able to keep the relationship going. Just like what happens in relationships that end where people haven't been married.

There are a lot of people my age who have already been divorced. To me, that says they jumped in too quickly and probably settled for someone. Either way, I'm not going to hold divorce against someone. I've dated people who are divorced and I don't have a problem with it. But, like I said, I'd be pretty wary of those who are my age who have been divorced more than once already.

my wife was 13 years older than me she reached 37 and had mid life crisis and started sleeping with 21 year old partying all the time as soon as i found out i left hate cheaters

---->"maybe some of us are only capable of love only once in a lifetime."


Get rid of that limiting belief and you will have women all over you...

good article in the 20,s i was busy raising a sis then by the mid to late 20s every girl had two to three kids just add me at 30 most were on antidepressants or variety of pills or hard drugs or holier than thoughs.. i lost a kid in 98 due to my ex speeding out till she hemaraged so i didnt have much interest in going through that kind of pain again.
I have to say being on both sides of the fence when i was raising a kid i got alot more respect than what i get now not that ive stopped looking in on her just live by myself an alot of people look at you as a wierd or bad person because you are still single at my age an never married im 43 will be 44 tommorrow .thanks for posting the article alot of truth in it.

Thanks for sharing Your story! Sorry, for your loss.

I think this Topic has drawn a lot of attention, I am surprised just how much.

A Man could committ to only one woman, without getting married to her. But, the percentage of them that do, probably is low percent. Unless they are livins are engaged to be married.

Oh I have traveled for many years and have seen how nasty people in general can be so really nothing surprises me. You made me chuckle when I read the comment about melting faces though.

I want guys in my age group which is in their 50s and as they are hitting their mid-life crisis; they want a younger woman as least that is how it is here. You have to remember I am in oiltown and these men with money want eye candy not some old woman in her 50s. Men get as crazy in their mid-life crisis as women do in their menopause. I have tried in my 20s, 30s, 40s, and even when I turned 50; but no luck. Its too late for me now at my age so I just need to live out my life the best way I can on my own. Hell; after seeing how the floods have affected our city; really being single is the least of my worries. Thanks for the kind words but bottom line men don't find me attractive. I have accepted this and I have moved on to things that really matter to me like helping out in my community.

Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't they'd be married too.
H. L. Mencken