To some folks maybe. Not to me. At 50, I've already had enough "weird" to last me a life time.LOL

This is something I have wondered about. How can one tell what is a cut and paste? And what isn't? Me personally, When I decide to write someone I write a message for that person, If possible. One thing though that I have noticed about womens profiles here and other sites, Is their lack of info about themselves. I mean, How can women who put very little to no info in their profile expect any man to write a decent message to her?

And these "If you want to know,just ask" profiles, I don't see how they get anywhere. I read in other forums here and other sites where women gripe about men not reading profiles. They talk about how men don't write them and how they never say anything in their return message that lets them know he read her profile. A lot of times I will go look at the ladies profile. Usually I find very little info about the person or the same "If you want to know,just ask" crap. It leaves me wondering, "What in the world does this person expect?" You're lucky you got a message at all. Even if it was "Copy & Paste. I'm not saying that you're this way. I'm just saying I've come across this a lot. Some more of that "weird" behavior we are talking about.

This is my reason to not follow up with a response. I ALWAYS read a guys profile before emailing him. Sometimes, actually MOST times the person I'm talking to has nothing in common with the profile I've just read.

So, I move on.

I have a blank profile and am not really caring about messages. Many on here already know me from times in the past that I was on here with an active profile. Also I have had no problem with being messaged. I get quite a few. After some time and experience you will be able to distinguish the frauds easily. As a quick suggestion, a message that is somewhat longer and has no specifics about you or tells you exaggerated compliments, for example, things that could be said to anyone....are probably being said to everyone....

I have the opinion that people that do this must be put off by the messages sent to them. For example "Hey", "Yeah Ok", "Thanks", or maybe have there messages destroyed by people that do not know how to communicate and have a proper conversation.

Maybe they were expecting to be excited by interacting with you based on the impression your profile gave them. The Internet is an hard place when it comes to personality in messages as there are no emotions.

Hum, OK, I think I get you. I'm only speaking for me here. Blank profile or very little said about yourself in your profile = Zero chance of a message from me. I don't mean this to be personal. Neither do I mean any offense to you. To me, If a woman can't or will not for whatever reason speak about herself in her profile,At least enough to give me some idea of who she is, It shows lack of depth to me. I have found that a most of these are boring people.

I've been in corporate "cyber security" for years. I've learned that you can't trust anyone over the net. Some women will lie and try to hide things just as much as some men will. So, When I come across a profile that has very little info in it. And the person who owns the profile isn't very forth coming with info about themselves, Getting just basic info out of them is like pulling teeth with nothing to dull the pain, Get away from them. They either have no personality or are up to no good.

right I am not interested in trying to impress you

those who I am interested in know me from the past, the forums, or will get to know me on that basis. And your response I thought boring so ... it is fitting that u find that in me also

namaste

So often the original letter (yours I don't know) is well crafted, gone over, even professionally edited, and then the second or third letter you get the real person and it isn't "pretty".

More guys have put their foot in their mouth so far down their throat a couple of exchanges in you would think they had a second adams apple.

It is soon clear that they have not read your profile or even a sprinkleing of your posts.

And it is sad but you don't have to be on line long to know that there is a shipload of attitude sailing your way no matter how nice you try to be so either you ignore them, or ehh really more justified than you guys will ever know you ignore them.

Or and if some guy really begs for it and hits you at the end of a tough day you are lible to actually tell them why.

Mostly we don't give you a reason and we just bow out it is because it is something not all that bad just wasn't matching and we don't want to make a big deal about it. Sometimes people are just different not wrong.

Many people decide to flake on others because they have been scared off by something.

I have never shown 'enthusiasm' for someone until I get to know them better, but even I will flake away if I notice they have something very negative in their messages or profiles.

For most people, being flaky is a safeguard to protect against awkward "I am just not into you" conversations.

This I believe to be the closest to the truth. But to me, It still falls under "weirdness" in a lot of people. This is just me, I've talked to and dated a lot of women that I met on another site. I liked them as a person. But I never have met one in all this time that there picture or profile "grabbed" me to the point that I was all that attracted to them. I'll never understand how some folks can be like that with someone over the net.

I guess what I am saying is, I never give the impression right off the bat that I think this or that woman is all that much. I wait till I meet her and then draw my conclusions of what I think about her. Most women I have dated I don't even say anything about a second date to her while on the first one. If I call her, I call her, If I don't, I don't. That pretty much takes care of the "not into you" conversation for me. I guess I just don't see any point in being flaky. Honest from the start has always worked for me.

But then again, I know how a lot of men are. A lot of them can't take rejection. To me the ones who can't take rejection are not comfortable within themselves. They have to big of an ego. They think they have to have a woman with them or they are not whole. A lot of them are control freaks.

Me, If a woman tells me she doesn't want to see me anymore, Or not into me, It's OK. I go get another one. And one other thing, I never go out with a woman expecting anything. Works better for me that way.

All - I am 41, spent a little time as an instructor, have been all over the world, and I can truthfully tell you that people in general are "weird."

It boils down to a matter of perspective. Where you're from, it may be totally acceptable to pluck you finger up your nose an dig for gold in public. Where I'm from, that is a no-no. I say pick your nose in the bathroom, or somewhere private.

Digressing, people usually have a real-life persona, and an online one. Heck, some folks probably have mutliple pesonalites in both places. Don't they call that schizophrenia?

Charles, therein lies your answer.

I like your take on things - thank you!

Are you saying that folks online are "Schizo"lol

You sound like you might have had my kind of luck with online dating?

To be honest, That's pretty much what I have found. Women who act sometimes more than one way online. And even more different in person.

Some guys send emails that are not personalized at all. They're all about themselves. Those are the kind that seem like they were cut and pasted into emails to several women.

Maybe cuz their wife/husband caught them chatting on a dating site....

But I'm weird all the time, even when not on dating sites.

I understand what you're getting at. But it still goes back to what I said before. So many put very little in there profiles. What do they expect? I mean, If this guy looks at a profile, Maybe he thinks she is a good looking woman that he would like to talk to. But she has very little in her profile. Where does he start to write her? Maybe he starts by talking about himself? Maybe he thinks that if he tells about himself to whom ever he is writing, Maybe it will prompt her to open up a little?

Who knows, Maybe he is copy & pasting to a bunch of women. Maybe he is doing this because there is not enough info about the woman to personalize a message to her to start with? It's hard to write to someone you don't know. But, Most women expect men to write them first. But how can he if the person he is trying to write doesn't give him anything or very little to compare his likes and dislikes to?

And another thought. I've seen this argument on another thread on another site. 90% of messages sent by most men are ignored. Never answered. Me personally, I don't care. I don't write that many anyway. Me personally, I haven't had that big of a problem getting messages answered. But it seems from what I have read I am not the norm. I'm one of the exceptions. But what about those that almost every message they send gets ignored? I think that a lot of them get tired of writing personalized messages to women who will not answer. I think a lot of them feel like it's like grasping for straws in a whirl wind anyway. So, Write one letter, Copy & paste to a bunch of people. See what happens.

But, Then again, Maybe some men need better writing skills?

Oh yah! I think that's a good one ^^^^^

So, I sent a lot of similar initial messages to women and I was basically saying hi and would you like to chat. Big deal. Get over it girls. Your profile doesn't make you special. Replying and becoming friends does.