It feels good to say: "Sorry I'm not available right now!" (And really mean it too!)..I'm not ready to start dating again and I know it!...Have you ever told someone that you're "not available" when you're not dating anyone? (And not in a relationship?)...Maybe I should wear a "no vacancy" sign around my neck! (Just teasing!)

I have to tell b that constantly. So persistent.

i'm no quitter!

How many people here don't really consider themselves "available?" (Even though this is a dating site?) Just curious!...Basically I just come here to post on the forum.

i'm not available.

Yeah it's gotten to the point that I have to carry around a big stick to beat them off with.

I know its fricken ridiculous. I am so tired of hot guys with six packs , claiming they are "18" when they are probably only "16" trying to hook up with me. Come on already, sheeze!

Im always taken, even when Im not. And if I want to be avail. I will let that special guy know!

I'm available.

(Understatement of the year.)

Maybe I could word it better. "I am sorry, I beg you a thousand pardons, but I am available. Please forgive me."

And the OP is right, I feel awful every time I say the above.

Have never said that and will not...If in fact I come across someone that I really click with if they live in my area then I'm going for it...

My past relationships are just that in the past....I have no hang ups with any relationships from the past... You learn from it and get past it..

Guess we're all in different "places." I know I need time to come into my "own" again...It's only been 2 years since my husband died. And my son just passed away a month ago...Just need time to process all of it and "find myself" again.

I often question whether I should bother looking for love. Only because I have such a strong friendship with one of my male friends. Know what I mean? The type where they know all my quirks and habits. Known him long enough, that I could easily write a biography about him.

There are exceptions to every rule...Yours my dear is not from a relationship that went wrong. It takes time to grieve and find ones self again after losing a loved one then to loose a child on top of that. In your situation then yeah I would take all the time I needed till I could open my heart to another...

In the process of finding yourself again don't close that door completly for others to come in...

At times they are there when one least expects it, but if you at least give it a chance there would be no regrets of what if???

unavailable has been my lifestyle since my husband and I split in 2009


and the longer I remain that way, Im finding it hard to stop,,,lol

I can relate...My husband and I were "just friends" for 2 years before love entered the picture...We became best-best friends and had so much fun together. He never tried to put the "make" on me and never pushed for "more." I felt so safe and secure with him because he wasn't on the "hunt" or needy etc...One day we both realized that we were in love with each other...It was plain to see that we were a "great match" and we were both ready for "more" at that point in our relationship...So there's no telling what might happen when we "click" with someone as "friends."....I'm a hard woman to "catch" because I don't like to rush into things. My husband wasn't in a hurry to fall in love or get married again either. This made us a "good match" and we enjoyed being friends with no strings attached...We didn't make it a goal to fall in love someday. Both of us would have been happy just staying friends for the rest of our lives..."Love" sort of "snuck-in" and "surprised us" at some point. And we embraced it!

Thanks for your caring post...My son started having medical problems shortly after my husband died...So I put my grief over losing my husband "on hold" for awhile to focus on my son...I had to "play soldier" to get through all the "ups" and "downs." I couldn't let myself "fall apart."...Now I'm doing "double grief." Or really "triple grief" because my other son passed away a few years ago too...Everyone is "gone" now and I'm the only one left in my family. I have to get used to my "new reality" before I decide to "merge" with someone "new."...I have to let myself grieve for awhile. And then start the process of "reinventing myself" as a single person again. (With no kids left either!)

Yep :) A bond like Bert and Ernie. A bond that is hard to break. I think we're just going with the flow.

My who ha just cried in premeditated pain when you uttered 18" Madness!!

I think with me is I don't have the time to be available.