Why is it that a lot of women I semi meet here want to have my email address right out the gate "so we can chat?" Why is it that people do not want to message and email here first and after a couple of weeks take it to the next level?

I am not being too cautious not wanting to just hand out my phone number or email address am I?

First of all I want a real date and not some contrivance that will be canceled the day I am supposed to go out for some effed up bogus reason like Cold Feet. Also I want to know who I am going to be engaging in deeper communications before I try to take anything to the next level.

I am not here for instant gratification. i am here to find something real that will last a lifetime. Not what is here and now. So seriously folks, is there something wrong with me or am I misinterpreting things?

Or am I playing it safe and dogging spammers the smart way? That isn't to say I don't communicate with people here. I do have some f4riends i mail back and forth with. It is the women I really want to meet that seem hell bent on wanting to exchange Phone Numbers Immediately or emails and when I ask them to keep it here for a little they just blow me off.

I think you are doing the right thing...I never give out my personal info unless I've been talking to some one for awhile..if we can't visit here at first..oh well!

well because from my experience it's easier to use e-mail than this site(at least thats what they say to me), obviously they don't know about instant messaging on here.

The last time I gave out my email address the spam was merciless for about three weeks until my spam filter got a handle on it.

I gave out mine to a little cutie in Nigeria.

As soon as I send her the money she's coming over to live with me.

She promised we would be happy forever.

Can I trust her?

yeah definitely, nigerians on dating websites are the most trustworthy people in the world

Number one red flag of a spammer/scammer. First of all, a valid email address is sellable. Second if they can get you off the site, it's more difficult to report them for abuse.



Not at all.



Yes. Reporting, blocking, and NOT responding to them is the best way to deal with it. Admin. will investigate reports and determine if they are valid or not.

What if you report someone for being a scammer and they are not? No harm, no foul.

Sounds like true love to me. Go for it lol

damn bored and u should go for it haha :) but dont let her play the easy roll kep track on where shes at

Giving out your e-mail right away to someone you don't know is never a good idea, but if you have exchanged a few messages and shared a couple of laughs and thoughts I don't see much harm in it as you mentioned. It usually does not take very long to see what kind of person you are dealing with through mostly casual letters. In the end it is probably better to be overcautious than to be possibly hounded by spam or extra advertisements.

Some people though do move pretty quickly, and like the idea of talking away fro the site. The one reason I can think of, especially for the women, is the possible constant messages and distractions pestering you when all you want to do is talk or message with one person. Can't say it is like that most of the time, but I can see it some cases.

If you are asked about it, just state how you feel and why you feel that way. Nothing says you have to go off site, and if they are into you, they will respect that.

Look at the bright side, it could be worse. You could have trouble dressing yourself like someone who shall remain nameless.

There is only one reason they are .......SCAMMERS....

Report them through e-mail and let Admin check them out this is the easiest way and the smartest way to do it...The site provides the system all they ask is that the members actually use it...

If it is determined they are scammers Admin will deal with them....

Don't be too hard on yourself hunny!!! We can't see if you are on your computer nekkid or dressed funny..

oh and Andy....you have been around here long enough to know what the right thing to do is.....and you are doing it.

Danger! Danger!

Not all are scammers.

I've given out my email address and number to a few and only one was a scammer.

I just play it by ear. I run a mile from anyone that calls me "dear" or "my love" and pretty much take it as authentic if I get called "babe" pretty commonplace to be called that by people that don't know each other in parts of London despite the fact I find it annoying .

The fact that you're questioning whether you're playing it too safe, probably means that you are.

How are you my dear love babe? :) jk

But, seriously how's it going, friend?

I'd say be careful too, I get to know people on here for awhile first, then decide. There's not many I would give that out to. I wish you the best of luck.

It's definitely not just women who do that. Most men who email me want an email address as well. While I don't think they're all scammers, I still don't give it out unless I actually like chatting with them.

Life is full of risks, you can hide in a closet and grow old alone, oh hey I already did that.

Take a chance, she might just be the real thing, even though the odds are against it.

Just got 2 request for my phone number so we can text....NO. Oh yes...and how beautiful I am yadda ....yadda...yadda... Delete.