Hey silly he is talking about on the application, not every time you called in sick.....

Good one my Bro!!!

I have never had to.
It makes it very difficult when you employ someone and they cannot do what they said they could.
As an employer if you had something on your resumee that wasnt true it wouldn't worry me as long as you could do the job I employed you for.
If I employed you and you couldnt I would be pretty cranky.

wouldn't do much good to lie in my line of work.
yer either experienced on equipment, or yer not.
They know in a matter of......minutes!!!!
I have seen many pups come and go who said they could run a piece of equipment...........
Fired before the hour was up!!!!!

I sit with a cold drink in my hands and reflect fondly on the day I learned to lie, it was a most glorious day indeed.

I would go hungry

No, I have not lied to get a job.

What do people put on their resume who apply to be the minister of a congregation?

A preacherman... who preaches the bible... how can he avoid saying the occasional falsehood (like saying that God is omnipotent, or that He is good, so He sent His only Son to die a most horrible death... if this is "good", then I'd rather be with Satan)?

If a person lies and commits a sin and hides Jews from the nazis... is his lie still a sin?

Why would one therefore be considered sinful to lie on his or her resume? God said "I'll protect you" and look what he did to Job. The Job situation these days is dire, so you must either lie on your resume, or else get up and go look for a Job to find you a job.

But God is omnipotent and good! A preacher believes these things to be true, (and so do I!) so the statements are not lies.

I've been waiting a while to come back to this thread.

The simple fact is, If you don't lie, Or exaggerate the truth a little, In today's world you will be left behind in the job world. In the past few weeks I have been hearing on my local news that companies in general are not hiring people who have been out of work any length of time. With the job market as bad as it is right now here in the USA it's hard to get a job.

But here, Companies are so out of touch with the real world that they think you should be doing something. Even if there is nothing to be had in your part of the world. So, You have to lie. You have to say that you have been doing this or that even if you haven't. If you don't it's job death for you.

I got laid off in 2008 from a job that I had been doing for yrs. It took me two yrs to find a job. The longest it's ever taken me. Yes, I lied. I said that I had been running my own lawn care business for that two yrs. Even though I hadn't. I hate it, It's just the truth. If I had not lied I would not had gotten the job I have. This company will not hire anyone that's been out of work over six months. I found that out after I went to work for them.

To these that I have seen in this thread say they would go hungry, No disrespect intended, I think you're full of shyt. You would not let yourself or your family go hungry. You would lie on an application or do any thing else you would have to do to feed yourself and your family. Especially if you're a man. You know it yourself, A man doesn't have a hair on his a$$ if he doesn't do the best he can to at least try to feed himself and his family. That includes lying on an application if he has to.

No.
It doesn't.
Practicing deceit from the getgo is a
character issue, not a money issue.
Bank robbery can't be far behind.

And contrary to your statement, WE know
what truth is and replied that way.

Maybe you can help me out, Souphie.

I am looking for an entry-level woman.

Nuff said.

Avoid elevators?

Lies or truths got zero to do with getting a job. Talk is cheap.

You can do it or you can't.

Ohhhhhhhhh yeahhhhhhh, TWICE!

The first was when I got a job at Heavenly Valley Ski Resort, as a Ski Hostess, which requires you to be an expert skier, which I said I was, thinking that I could just FAKE IT. It all went bad,when I took my first group of intermediate and beginner skiers up, and it took me an HOUR to get them back down, because I unknowingly took them down Gunbarrel, instead of RoundAbout, and it was step as hell, and nothing but bumps. It took about an HOUR to get them all down. It was an EXTREME EXPERT RUN. They sent me to the lodge to cocktail waitress instead

The second was when I applied for a job as a bartender, and because I had already been a cocktail waitress, I thought I could FAKE that one too. Then people starting ordering things that I didnt know how to make, so I went and bought the "Tom Collins" book of bartending, and hid it under the bar, which was working GREAT, until my boss saw me looking at it to make a drink. He actually wasent happy that I lied, but he did think it was hilarious, so he let me stay.

Sounds good Joe. I, for one, love the Co-Op idea.

I would bone everyone for a good meal with sex and some souvegnier photos/video.

At this point in my life I haven't had to lie to get a job. I give a great interview and have gotten every job I've wanted. I've been supporting myself for the last 20 years on driving a School Bus. Problem is that the hours per day stink and school is out in the summertime. It has never been enough to sustain me when I raised my children and had to pay all the bills solo. So I made myself very resourse-full. I've always felt that I could do anything when I put my mind to it. I have been a Proof Operator for a bank, Secretary/Clerk/Receptionist, Cashier, Delivery Driver for a nursery, Bus Washer/Scheduler, Janitor/Warehouse work, Shuttle Bus Driver for Ford-Roughe Plant. And now that schitt is hitting the fan on Support Personal for the Schools, I went back to school and got my Certified Nursing Assistant License. I did all this while still driving for a School District. As of these recent days, I work 4 jobs. I drive a School Bus 6 3/4 hours a day, Clean a house one day a week, take care of a handicapped girl everyother weekend, and am a fill in for an assisted living home.

So when people tell me that they can't get a job...I say bullschitt. Either you don't want one or you are scared to try to branch out of your shell and try something new. Or you are just plain lazy and feel somehow the world "owes" you in someway. I never felt that lying was an option to me. I always/still do...feel that I will survive and have some of the luxuries in life that I love by hard work and Believing in Myself and my God.

I had a similar experience, and learned from it that there is no such thing as an inept bartender.

if you serve the wrong drink, but put twice as much booze in it as you'd be normally supposed to, the drinks never get returned, only a lot of tips come back to you.

This can become expensive, so if you're a budding lying bartender, you must learn a drink every day, that would help.

I had to quit my bartending job, because I would get extemely nervous around clean empty glasses. I had to put trayfuls of them on slide-in storage above the bar, and the trays were slippery. On my first day the other guy had three trays (one at three different times) go wobbley in his hands and all the glasses hit the floor, tiled, lots of broken glass and screaming managers with their jugulars extending three feet out from their hardened white collars.

I am short, so for a while I would ask the dishwasher to lift them to the spot, but eventually (after three months) he realized I made forty-seven times more money in tips than he did, so I had to quit.

--------------

Edit: I was inventive, too, on my bartending job. First I learned that anything that goes with orange juice, also goes with half-o-j and half-perrier or other bubblies. People went gaga.

Some dames would come to me and ask me to fix them what I did for them yesterday, "your own creashon, yunno" and I had no clue what I had done, so I would put some random booze in the glass and at least three types of random mixers, small amounts of these latter, and bang, I was touted as the most wonderful bartender in town, with the biggest c***. If you are a woman bartender, you'll be called the the best, who also has bluest of eyes, and biggest of t*ts, even if you are a dark-haired midget woman who shaves her own back daily.

Yee haw, bartending. The best job in the world. I always could fall back on that job. I don't mean fall on my back any day I worked. I never drink, so the managers loved me too. (Had to keep them away from me with a stick. After a while of that I started to only take jobs at bars with female management.)

As a corollary, there is no such thing as a clutzy hooker who's is so little attractive and so repulsive, that she can't make ends meet (so to speak, and also so to speak.) and can't make a lot of money.

There are bad cops, lawyers who get disbarred, presidents who get impeached, doctors who get shot, drug dealers that go sober and clean and become accountants for large banks.

But hookers can't f up on the job. It is impossible to do so for them. In fact, the more the hooker fs up, the more skilled and better at their job she is consedered to be.