So I met a guy who I was mildly interested in until I realized that he still isn't over his ex, which is totally fine, but he doesn't have to keep talking to me about it. I just want to say, "Ok, I'm gonna stop talking to you now, but for future reference, you probably shouldn't whine about your ex's, like a big old cry baby." I ain't Dr. Phil fool. My question is, why are men so clueless when it comes to things you should, or should not be saying to a woman?

i know how u feel

Because we haven't learned to shut off our emotions like most women can do....

We are just confusing.....

women are the same way

Well, this has happened to me a few times too... well at least the part about the guy talking about his ex all the time. I'm not sure why they do it, but I'd also like to know. Honestly, I'm sure there are girls out there doing the same thing, so we can't just say it's guys who have no clue what they should be saying.

i have a ex like that, as where hes always telling me about some other girl that he likes and yet he has told me a number of times he wanted to get back together with me.. i have known him for 18yrs and of course he still hasent changed, hes alcoholic and i put up with that for a yr and that was enough, i will still talk to him every now and then but i wont deal with his crap any more.he wont change. he has a good heart and soul though.. it just not what im wanting and needing in my life...

I honestly don't think men realize they should not talk about their ex's! I often wonder if they get nervous and just spout off whatever they feel like talking about without even thinking?
Did you try to change the subject? If so, if he kept talking about her, maybe hes not over her yet? I find that if someone keeps talking about their ex and are angry about them, they are usually still IN love with them.
I say move on and find someone else. If you are anything like me, I get sick of being like Dr. Phil!! Good luck

ugh

Nah. I have seen more women talk about their exes than men.


But I know that my ex brother in law used to do it to get sympathy from a woman he was interested in.

I don't mind people telling me about their exes. I like that they miss them. It means that they can really care about someone.

I'd hate to think that if someone was with me, that he wouldn't want to talk about me sometimes. You make waves in other peoples lives. That's important.

im over my ex besides shes on another planet
so just dome!!!!

It is all just conversation to me...

People always cross my path for a reason ... sometime briefly, sometimes our paths run parallel for a time and we become friends, sometimes they run parallel for a long time and every once in a while you find a great love in there.

It is all just human interraction to me. Why we cross paths is not always clear until the looking back.

I am interested in who people are, what they care about, their hopes, dreams and fears, what inspires them.

I hold no expectations from the conversation other than getting to know them. If there is something deeper there, it will show itself for exploring. Maybe I'll make a new friend...I am cool with that.

It's all in how you grow up and what you learn in life. Some Men/Women chose not to grow so there for the clueless will set in. Just before I met my lady I ran into this girl about 4 to 5 months ago that I was interested in. Like you I found out that she was still dealing with issues with her ex and still to this day she has not healed from it. I guess some people lile to hang on to things and hope that it will change. See nothing in life will change until you start yourself and take a little action

Men & Women both do this have seen it many times even in here it all comes down to THEY HAVE NOT MOVED ON YET!

They need to get over the past relantionship before moving on to the next one. If your not over them then don't drag another one in to your screwed up world deal with what you need to before you involve someone else to get hurt in cause you decide to go back to the ex. Finish what ya start before added more problems.

Different way to look at it; People feel a need to understand what went wrong. Don't understand & have a NEED to; so it doesn't happen again.

If you really think about it you don't want to limit or control someones conversation because you won't get the real them! It either works or not. He obviously wasn't for you and thats OK!

Well if I knew I wouldn't be clueless now would I? Beats the heck out of me.

I guess exchanging information about exes is like exchanging war stories but different than exchanging fish stories about the big one that got away.

well said hillfolk!! and men are clueless as they're so used to acting the way they are around their exes and their friends they forget they're meeting new ppl so have to act differently just my opinion *shrugs*

Wow, that is deep, Jaded. I will have to let that sink in for a while. So in other words one is making a new friend and there has to be some catching up to do for the new friend as well as one's self with that new friend. Kind of like uncharted territory.

exactly!!! i'm impressed hillfolk you actually understood where I'm coming from