No, of course she wouldn't because although you've clearly stated your preferences in your profile, your criteria rejected her before she could tell you how 'great' she would be as a prospective partner for you. How dare you?

Well, as it turns out, there's such a thing as being TOO opposite....

Maybe I'm looking at this wrong, but if she was REALLY thinking about changing my mind as to her suitability as a prospective partner, I don't think infantile insults and venom-spewing is going to push me too far in that direction....

Not saying the "catch more flies with honey" strategy is necessarily going to be any more effective, but at least there might be an incentive for me to listen....!

I think it's about choices vs circumstance. You can't help the fact that you are over 35, so why feel bad about it? But a person can become defensive about their personal choices, like having kids or drinking alcohol or not using a spell checker.

Everybody has to go through the same processes of becoming a mature functioning adult. Some woman who still has thin skin might be hurt or offended by your profile, but your profile might make her become a bit more thick skinned. And she probably wouldn't have been offended if she wasn't attracted to you on some level, so that should boost your ego a bit.

I know (some) people think differently, but juvenile insults isn't a good way of trying to change someone's mind...I will always think twice if I get a msg that starts off by saying 'although I don't meet your prefences etc'. That's honey to me...

That's a good point. I mean, I'm not trying to offend anybody (in all fairness, it's not something I spend a lot of time thinking about, so it's not like I'm actively NOT trying to offend anybody, either -- I see it as more of a choice on the part of the reader, to take offense or not, than anything intentional on the part of the writer) -- but maybe she was attracted to me on some level. Part of me shudders at the thought!

lex ur having a grand time being stalked
when most guys her are sexually attacking me "hey baby lets fxxk"
its like throwing ur corn but u never call the bird hahahahahaha crush bucketer

Well, that's actually kind of considerate. I don't ever get those. I get "You're a %*&@@#$% because you don't want to get involved with someone like me, you worthless piece of &^%$##*&&!@?"

And then they tell me the seventeen reasons why I should reconsider them. But with lots of *%^$###!?*&!?&& thrown in.

Being stalked is OK, at least on here!

(My real-life stalkers have been OK, too, to be honest, but I haven't had one of those in several years.)

Nobody ever throws corn or birds at me, though.

Exactly. I don't loose sleep if someone takes offense because I've listed on my profile that I'm not intested in a sex chat buddy or in someone that wants to show me his willy on his webcam or someone living outside of the UK. However, I would totally take responsibility if I hadn't listed my prefences...

Someone will always take offense in the same way that someone will always be grateful for you not having wasted their time by not being clear in regards to what you're looking for in a possible partner/relationship. Soddus law reigns supreme

Well, this goes back to my main point, I think -- which is preferences are inherently individual and should not be subjected to some sort of regimented standardization simply to avoid offending somebody.

There was a profile I read once, on another site, where the woman was only interested in guys 27-29. And I thought, "Well, that's awfully narrow, there might be a guy 26 or 30 who'd be just right for her," but I let it go. She wants what she wants, it's not my job to convince her otherwise. I'd probably just botch it all up anyway.

Roughly 50% of the population is looking at your
profile and going into automatic embattlement mode.
Women are prewired to quickly assess, strategize
and enact the assault.

And there you are, waving all those preferences
at them.
It makes you freaking irresistible.

Now, if you said, "I am not picky,
I will take anyone" you would
find true peace.

I've never gotten one of those either but it would be nice

Normally, I just get msgs from people that either haven't read my profile or assume that I'll naturally makes allowances for the fact that they don't meet my criteria...sometimes I do (make allowances) as my preferences, although seeming rigid, are not always set in stone.

But I'd also probably end up with someone like my ex-wife or worse (assuming such a thing is possible).

I don't even mind the assault, per se, provided it's civilized and well-written....(which it never is).

I'll admit, my profile does serve as a sort of "challenge" -- in a subtle, vaguely clinical way -- maybe people in general are not up for that, but maybe it serves as a low-level screener. I don't really know....?

My e-mails tend to be either:

a.) one or two words ("Hi" or "Hello" or "How RU")

b.) obvious scams {"I am to be liking your structure" or "I the girl of meeting is in for all time of one of family life to see for the man of this been out with many times daily of the restaurant for grooming of the window")

c.) attempts at starting arguments that can't possibly go anywhere

d.) attempts to obtain information that is already in my profile ("I read your profile and I loved it! Where are you and what do you do?")

The last time I got an e-mail from someone I would consider a legitimate dating prospect was in 1947.

Hey the fact she read your profile says something to her tolerance levels. Might not want to discount her completely...lol

Yeah, but I don't have the 1400-page profile up anymore. The new one is a lot shorter and possibly a little less redundant, although don't quote me on that.

and here i was looking forward to another mingle love story.
/:

Well, this is probably why i sometimes prefer dating a naive guy, as he wouldn't have so much of a problem, if i didn't want to date him. He wouldn't go all crabby. Idk if it's only me who thinks this, but the younger men, seem to take dating more lightly. That trait i really admire. As you have less of a chance of being hung, drawn, and quartered, just because they're not what you prefer. It ain't YOUR problem. It's HERS. Who needs someone with a bad attitude like that? Not many.

Oh the book is gone? I used to read a bit each day to try to get through it