Girlfriend, you go! You did the RIGHT thing. Who needs the 3rd degree??? If he's like this early on, he'd only get WORSE further into the relationship!

Count your blessings and consider cutting him loose one of them!

well seems to me like a control freak in progress either that or an abused guy where some girl mistreated him and cheated or he cheated.

Okay here is his reply....should I keep walking away or give him a second chance??


got up to write you an apology. The second one, if I remember correctly. Usually don't have this many in a year, but I DO, always, accept my fault.

I have had several bad experiences with women trying to play me in the last several months. I just wrote them off and kept going with my life. I never spoke my mind or told them how I felt.

Prior to this (timeline-wise), I buried 9 family members and a dog in a 3 year period. That's roughly a funeral every 3-4 months. Some were elderly, but some were near my age and died suddenly. I was talking to them one day and burying them 3 months later. I mentioned I had lost most of my family at dinner.

One of the last was my Father. He had Altzhimers and I took car of him, and worked full time, the best I could till near the end. He died a couple of years ago near my birthday. That made 2 deaths near my birthday and I gotta tell you, it's no longer the happy time of year it should be.

BUT, those people that said I'm no good and it'll only get worst have no right to judge me unless they've been me. And, as bad as I feel about all this, even you don't have the right to judge me. You've got your parents and siblings: your support group. That's a very valuable thing and never take it for granted.

None of this is your problem or your fault. It's my problem and I guess it finally boiled over and you got the bunt of it. That's not fair to you.

I AM SORRY.

Yes. I do feel insecure these days. It's been rough and the few relatives I have left are surprised at how well I've kept it togather, although you probably don't agree. You see I live alone and that always makes things a little harder. My one Uncle, that lives here, checked on me regularly the first year or so. I'm sure you understand.

Guess I got a lot of abandonment issues in my face these days. And in all fairness to me, from my perspective, the day ended at 10pm so you did not call when you said you would. But even that isn't, and shouldn't, have been a big deal. I was sitting here having a drink and getting madder the nearer it got to 10pm. Guess I got a few things I need to deal with.

YOu seem like a very nice person and didn't deserve to get the brunt of all this, but it happened. I might add, you handled it surprisingly well and I'm surprised we are even speaking. Maybe that means something, but I suspect you're done with this and I really don't blame you or expect a reply. I just had to clear my consciouss (never could spell that word) and maybe give you a little insight to what just happened.

I could sit here and blow a lot of smoke up your ass and play the game to get you back, but I'm not. Not even sure why I'm unloading on a near-perfect stranger. Guess it comes back to character: I don't like to hurt anybody, intentionally nor accidently.

Thanks for being cool-headed and, again, I'm sorry.

Carl

Just my opinion

Stay away, he admits to alot of problems that need handled BEFORE he can handle any relationship. You could say get some professional help & see where I am at in a year.

i replied back that I appreciate his appology, however I hope he understandinds that I do not think we are compatable and word of advice...give the next woman room to breathe and allow her to disappoint you a few times because we are all human and not perfect--

thats correct joyce and you will find a nice man cus you are sweet

good for you joyce, if this is how he starts it could only get worse. He sounds controlling which can lead to abuse

verry nicely handled...

joyce,
there is nothing worse than the "oh poor me" defense. I think if you acted like an ass, then admit it but don't tell me how your whole life has sucked, and I was a target. I will not be a target for other peoples "bad" days and you shouldn't either.
you did a good thing
Lori

He buried 9 family members??? hmmmmm..that just sounded strange in itself....no.. I'm kidding....you did the right thing...i feel sorry for him(with his problems) but he needs to get a LIFE himself before he can even START ONE with anyone else...good luck joyce!!

just my opinion joyce, but he sounds very controlling right from the get go.!!

I mean as amazing as ALL that seems....don't ya just get tired of 1 excuse after another?....I know I do!

Who sits around thinking up 50 questions? I don't have time, or for that matter, patience, to answer 50 questions. Dump Inspector Clouseau, and find someone who doesn't have a prepared laundry list of questions that you have to answer.

Were they multiple chice, true/false, fill in the blank, or my most hated, essay questions?(LOL)

read my lips
c o n t r o l i n g p o s s i v e m a n !!!!!
yes you did yhe right thing girl !!!

stanne i sad that way back

line from letter

I have had several bad experiences with women trying to play me in the last several months. I just wrote them off and kept going with my life. I never spoke my mind or told them how I felt.

------------------------

how does yer not calling fit this line in

and that his second line

after saying he does not apoligise
think about it

run joyce don't walk do not collect $200 for passing go
cause you need to stop it in his tracks
-----------------

but hey what do i know

(((((((((JOYCE))))))))

RUN, SWEETIE RUN

One thing that I have learned is that if someone cannot understand the responsibilities and life of a nurse, then run. There is too much stress with the job, you don't need any added stresses with a 5 year old man.

Don't look back, delete his a** with the quickness!!

I only read the first and last page, but awwwwww, that poor guy.

Not that I think you handled it wrong or should have given him a second chance; but that is a lot to deal with in any amount of time.

Bottom line though, no one has the right to question you like a child, which was how he was acting. Regardless of abandonment issues, he JUST MET YOU! He has absolutely no claim on you as far as a relationship goes.

still, his story was so sad

the following phrase could be a warning:

Prior to this (timeline-wise), I buried 9 family members and a dog in a 3 year period.

yawannabe 10?

an asshole will always expose himself eventually.Thank goodness this one did it early.you did the right thing.

thank you everyone

and yes- TJ I am tired of it, tired of dating!!
rather be in a relationship and I know everyone has their
bad habits-- but I am not possessive or jealous and I
do not expect the same!!