lol, I take all such 'studies' and generalizations in stride

magazines arent my cup of tea,,lol

I woud never say something like that

I was just reading an article by People magazine about emotional ninjas last night at work. It was in the September issue this year. "We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it." It is one of our promises in our Big Book. If one can learn from the past then one can move on but if one can't learn from the past one can get stuck in the past. It can be like stuck in a revolving door. It is like a time out. We used to play this game as kids. It was time out then time in.

A dichotomy is any splitting of a whole into exactly two non-overlapping parts, meaning it is a procedure in which a whole is divided into two parts. It is a partition of a whole (or a set) into two parts (subsets) that are:
jointly exhaustive: everything must belong to one part or the other, and
mutually exclusive: nothing can belong simultaneously to both parts.
The two parts thus formed are complements. In logic, the partitions are opposites if there exists a proposition such that it holds over one and not the other.
In the community of philosophers and scholars, many believe that "unless a distinction can be made rigorous and precise it isn't really a distinction."

Personally, I think it depends on your personality type and sometimes people think you aren't getting over something because you are expressing feelings but really in expressing the feelings you are moving forward. I have always been a moody temperamental writer and you can tell when I have processed through something when I start writing. It is when I am silent about something that you know I am the most hurt. For instance, I did not write about my divorce for over a year because it was too painful. I did all sorts of other stuff but none of my writing at all contained the words "ex husband". I divorced him and I could still not bring myself to say "ex husband" after being with him since I was 20. It took about 10 months for all men not to be referred by his name. I have had boyfriends since and I am still hung up my ex husband to a degree and talk about him too much. But I was with him from 20 to 39. It's not that I want back with him but half of my life was with him so if you ask about anything within that time frame, his name will most likely come up? Like who took you to that concert? etc.

One's past is a part of them. My past has haunted my poetry. I just didn't want the blackouts to win because in the times they won I would get the writer's block. If you are literary a writer's block can be like a black out. A friend on here who has been gone a long time from the forums helped me by telling me to end the poem when it came on a positive note. That helped me a lot because bridging is important to me. A writer's block can stifle one's creativity and creativity is important to a creative writer. Just because one writes doesn't always mean the poem has to be published. I wrote a lot of masked poetry and some poems that were four levels deep so I knew that the cryptic of it was safe to share.

I have always hated the saying get over it, it just sounds uncaring and yuck..

I guess its normally people who cant get over it, who its said to and normally by people who can get over it..

I dont have a problem getting over things, but i am lucky as my personalitly makes it easy, but I have friends who really struglle with it, yep to a point its a choice but for some its a really difficult thing to do.

It depends if it is a continuing whining theme, heard over and over again, like a seriously broken record...and nothing is done to change the outcome...

you would hear a ' For F * C K's sake, get over it, and get on with it'

an old saying of my mum's was ' S h * t or get off the pot '...so you can see where it comes from..

I have no interest in the whiney victim who just wants to moan and groan, and do absolutely nothing to change it.

I have been abused as a child, I have been raped as an adult, I've been bashed, beaten and left for dead...and I would still be back there if I hadn't dragged myself up by the bootlaces, and 'got over it'....I do allow people their own process, their own time, to heal and move forward...I don't play the perpetual victim/rescuer game though, not for anyone, including myself.