Curious, eh?



Myself, I feel I have a lot of self-control. When I was younger, I envisioned myself getting married once and only once. I only make an effort once I know the person and I feel we're going to connect on all levels for a very, very long time.

Honestly, I sometimes feel I was a fool and missed out on the right one because I was worried about ruining our friendship. She's now married with 2 kids in a second marriage last I heard.

Then again, maybe it was meant to be.

I keep myself very occupied running a business and working on other video and music projects that I don't allow myself to feel lonely much.

Have I had opportunities for flings through the years? Yea, a few. But I'm not selling myself short of my dream.

And happy to be single!

i like them married.

Well....some of us were dumb enough to hold out for the one that was never coming back....

More than 20 years. It was a total waste of time and a waste of my life. I am sooooo glad I did it. I am the rare idiot who won't settle for less. It led me through alot of nights alone through the years.

But, it paid off. That failed past led me here...to meet a woman I have grown to Love, honor and Apprecieate.

I dont think of me as "Never been married"....I think of myself as "Never been divorced".

I was with some friends last night, all of who are in their 30s, so I brought up the subject of people being wary of those who haven't been married by a certain age. Not surprising, they agreed with me that not having been married by a certain age is less of a red flag than someone who has been divorced more than once. So, I guess it's just all in who you ask. Then again, I live in a city where there are lots and lots of young (30s) single people. So, it could be much different in another place.

I can't see how being married and divorced is better than not.

I suppose there are circumstances in every situation that can lead a good person down the wrong path. I find in dating someone that was previously married bringing whatever issues they had that led to the divorce with them. The last thing I want to hear on a date is "my ex-husband used to do this or that".

No wonder she got a divorce. YOU have to put out MIKEY!

Honestly, to me, some divorced people are much more bitter than those who haven't been married. Take this forum for example, we often hear people talking about how they'd never get married again because of a marriage they've been in previously. That makes me stay away from people who are like that. I'd much rather be involved with someone who doesn't have that kind of attitude.

Yup. Single people bytch about exes quite often as well. You just don't get the bitter "I hate marriage and it ruined my life!" kind of thing with single people, though.

No real preference. But sometimes I do wonder when someone is in there 40s or more why they have never been married. It's not a concern just a curiosity.

I often wonder about people who are separated and looking to date, or even those who are newly divorced and looking to date. I would think it takes longer to get over the marriage/divorce and they should work on being alone for a bit. But, I see all kinds of people who are just divorced, or even only separated looking for new people already.

I can understand the curiosity of someone never been married and its nice to see that you don't see it as a concern. I see quite a few posters here do though. I don't think getting married younger is working all that well anyways. One needs to look at the divorce stats to see that. I have heard more than one person say they are getting tired of looking at the same face for 20/30 years or they say they just aren't on the same page anymore and are looking at a divorce. Maybe one should think about getting married later on in life as they can establish themselves, maybe do some traveling, get a good education, and just experience life. Why the rush to get married? I also wouldn't look at a man as a player if he was never married by 40 as some posters said. Without knowing the circumstance of why one never got married; who are we to judge? I think it quite feasible when someone says I never met the right person. Its not like a potential husband or wife is on every street corner. I wish folks would give us unmarried older people a break and stop judging us.

People who are newly separated or freshly divorced have probably been emotionally detached for a very long time and are eager to feel appreciated and feel pretty or handsome again. They want their self esteem back. I agree rushing out into the world of dating is awkward so quickly...but they are desperate to help their self esteem. Chances are those new relationships won't last anyways, but at least they will get laid and feel wanted again. I think it takes for me at least a while to find a comfort level with yourself to "really" put yourself out there. Sometimes its just for fun. I left my ex in 07. Im still single....go figure.

Well I married young I was only 23. But my divorce was not just because I couldn't stand looking at him for another 20+ years. There were circumstances not to be discussed here that made it neccessary for my health and my children's health that it happen. And i agree sometimes you just never meet the right person. I have a friend who is in his mid 40s who has never married and he is a great guy but he is very particular and I know he will never meet the right lady.

Part of our 'judgement' includes getting to know the reasons our potential has the experiences in their life that they have. I dont think anyone suggests that they would not even consider a date. Its just something that would be of interest. We are supposed to judge potentials.