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| Topic: IS HE PSYCHO OR JUST REALLY MAD? | |
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Alrighty been a hot minute since I have been here....ha ha ha so here I am seeking the advise of you Minglers....
Here is the scenario: Met a guy I like ( hard to believe I know) anyhow been dating just shy about 2 months ( 7 weeks). He has never stepped up to the plate to make it exclusive. In fact he has been wishy washy hot and cold. Apparently he has felt same about me so he says....Anyhow we talked about it and said we would work on our communications. He still never stepped it up. He left out of state for work. 3 days after he left and already communciations lacking a call here and there I went to a birthday party for an old friend. I text him before I left to the party and when I come home from party. No response. While at party an old friend from 10 yrs ago who is drunk begins to hit on me. This guy has a girlfriend who he lives with. Other friends thought it was funny. As an inside joke they took a pic of the 2 of us standing side by side with his arm around my shoulder. They posted the picture on facebook with a caption "Cute Couple". Picture comments followed "aww look" etc etc. The whole intent was to make fun of his drunk *** and to put him on Blast because he has a Girlfriend and was being a DB. I posted back to stop being a match maker he has a girlfriend! Apparently I was tagged in photo on my facebook page. The guy I have been dating Flipped out the next day. All of a sudden I am the bad guy and a whore because he says I didnt post back that I already have a man! ( which FYI I never knew he was my man!) Anyhow I tried to explain the situation and apologized a trillion times and pour my heart out to him for over an hour kissing his *** ( which I NEVER do) and yet he still is pissed and wants nothing to do with me. I realize that overall its insanely stupid. And what was meant as a joke probably was not that funny to him obviously. I do feel bad if I hurt him. But realistically I didn't do anything. It was only a photo. And after explaining the situation....I would think he would be able to let it go.... I feel frustrated because I didn't do anything with the guy or any other guy for that matter. I ve been waiting for him to step it up because he is who I wanted to be with. So it angers me that everything is now screwed up especially because was innocent and he refuses to believe me. He wants to believe what he wants and I can't change that or fix the situation. So now I feel Mind F k'd and heartbroken So to me it doesn't make sense.... I feel it would make more sense if he has insecurity hang ups or met someone else right? Or could he just be that mad and his pride causing all this? In a way I guess it doesn't matter unless he has a change of heart because as of now he hates me. Any words of wisdom appreciated... |
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ok, when i guy acts wishy washy it's because he is still playing the field. when he goes out of town for work, he could be out of town working (the field), or in town working the field on another side of town. when a guy sees your pic on fb with another guy, the ball is now in his court. he could throw it in your face or throw it in your face. see now the break up is all YOUR fault. girl, relationships are not one way streets. you should be with a person who makes your life BETTER, not with a person you are trying to make better. i don't know the whole situation, but if this guy was even halfazzing this relationship, i guarantee i guarantee you wouldn't be here asking for advise (bulldog double guarantee - patent pending)
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Well said ese
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This sounds a tad familiar as i've more or less had a similar thing happen to me. It's always the friend you've known for years that tries it on. lol. Believe me i know. Do you think your friend of ten years realised what he was doing? Seeing as he was drunk. A good friend shouldn't try to ruin your chances of finding love. The new guy you met, it sounds like he's jumped to his own conclusion. Of course, he should know better than to do that. In the meantime, could you try talking to that long-term friend of yours about it? |
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Ese may be right here. It seems as though he is using this as his way out. (let him) you obviously want more than he does, he makes that clear (from what I gather) whenever you two are not around each other.
It seems to me that if you were trying to let him know your whereabouts and exactly what you were up to that night and he didn’t care...well, that should be all you need to know about the future of this (one-sided) relationship. |
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Edited by
KevinHecka
on
Thu 08/18/11 11:18 PM
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Alrighty been a hot minute since I have been here....ha ha ha so here I am seeking the advise of you Minglers.... Here is the scenario: Met a guy I like ( hard to believe I know) anyhow been dating just shy about 2 months ( 7 weeks). He has never stepped up to the plate to make it exclusive. In fact he has been wishy washy hot and cold. Apparently he has felt same about me so he says....Anyhow we talked about it and said we would work on our communications. He still never stepped it up. He left out of state for work. 3 days after he left and already communciations lacking a call here and there I went to a birthday party for an old friend. I text him before I left to the party and when I come home from party. No response. While at party an old friend from 10 yrs ago who is drunk begins to hit on me. This guy has a girlfriend who he lives with. Other friends thought it was funny. As an inside joke they took a pic of the 2 of us standing side by side with his arm around my shoulder. They posted the picture on facebook with a caption "Cute Couple". Picture comments followed "aww look" etc etc. The whole intent was to make fun of his drunk *** and to put him on Blast because he has a Girlfriend and was being a DB. I posted back to stop being a match maker he has a girlfriend! Apparently I was tagged in photo on my facebook page. The guy I have been dating Flipped out the next day. All of a sudden I am the bad guy and a whore because he says I didnt post back that I already have a man! ( which FYI I never knew he was my man!) Anyhow I tried to explain the situation and apologized a trillion times and pour my heart out to him for over an hour kissing his *** ( which I NEVER do) and yet he still is pissed and wants nothing to do with me. I realize that overall its insanely stupid. And what was meant as a joke probably was not that funny to him obviously. I do feel bad if I hurt him. But realistically I didn't do anything. It was only a photo. And after explaining the situation....I would think he would be able to let it go.... I feel frustrated because I didn't do anything with the guy or any other guy for that matter. I ve been waiting for him to step it up because he is who I wanted to be with. So it angers me that everything is now screwed up especially because was innocent and he refuses to believe me. He wants to believe what he wants and I can't change that or fix the situation. So now I feel Mind F k'd and heartbroken So to me it doesn't make sense.... I feel it would make more sense if he has insecurity hang ups or met someone else right? Or could he just be that mad and his pride causing all this? In a way I guess it doesn't matter unless he has a change of heart because as of now he hates me. Any words of wisdom appreciated... Lady, if this fella (whom you've known for such a short time) 'hates' you, you need to head to higher pasture. Because he's a jerk. He didn't respond when you contacted him. That tells me he's either full of himself or just not interested. Keep on it if you like the abuse, if not turn your boat around. Good riddance to bad rubbish. K. |
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Edited by
Unknow
on
Thu 08/18/11 11:23 PM
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Ese may be right here. It seems as though he is using this as his way out. (let him) you obviously want more than he does, he makes that clear (from what I gather) whenever you two are not around each other. It seems to me that if you were trying to let him know your whereabouts and exactly what you were up to that night and he didn’t care...well, that should be all you need to know about the future of this (one-sided) relationship. I agree. I felt he was using as an out too. He said he is not of course. He says he doesnt trust me which exactly I wasn't hiding anything...I told him where I was and when I left......that it doesn't make sense to me at all. He says he isn't with anyone else either but I am not sure about that....that at least makes more sense...unless he is just psycho! IDK...it is what it is....just pretty lame...and yeah I am better off....still frustrating... Can't deny the mixed emotions going on within...AYE thanks Minglers |
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Ese may be right here. It seems as though he is using this as his way out. (let him) you obviously want more than he does, he makes that clear (from what I gather) whenever you two are not around each other. It seems to me that if you were trying to let him know your whereabouts and exactly what you were up to that night and he didn’t care...well, that should be all you need to know about the future of this (one-sided) relationship. I agree. I felt he was using as an out too. He said he is not of course. He says he doesnt trust me which exactly I wasn't hiding anything...I told him where I was and when I left......that it doesn't make sense to me at all. He says he isn't with anyone else either but I am not sure about that....that at least makes more sense...unless he is just psycho! IDK...it is what it is....just pretty lame...and yeah I am better off....still frustrating... Can't deny the mixed emotions going on within...AYE thanks Minglers By making you feel bad, or guilty, he is attempting to leave the door open should he feel the need to knock on it again. Any way you look at it, it’s a game for him. You just have to decide whether or not you are going to play... |
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ok, when i guy acts wishy washy it's because he is still playing the field. when he goes out of town for work, he could be out of town working (the field), or in town working the field on another side of town. when a guy sees your pic on fb with another guy, the ball is now in his court. he could throw it in your face or throw it in your face. see now the break up is all YOUR fault. girl, relationships are not one way streets. you should be with a person who makes your life BETTER, not with a person you are trying to make better. i don't know the whole situation, but if this guy was even halfazzing this relationship, i guarantee i guarantee you wouldn't be here asking for advise (bulldog double guarantee - patent pending) Well put Ese. I made these comments about how men are, and i stand by them. See below exxman exxman's photo Joined Tue 08/02/11 Posts: 383 Mon 08/15/11 08:45 PM Here is a big clue in case you have not figured it out yet through your own experience with your own relationships or dating or whatever you choose to call it. MEN Do not give a crap about some woman they are "just dating". If a man has any serious intentions HE WILL NOT say "yeah we are just dating" Quote | Reply exxman exxman's photo Joined Tue 08/02/11 Posts: 383 Mon 08/15/11 08:46 PM WINNER..... Men and women do not see "Just dating" as the same thing. If a man says we are just dating, he is leaving the door open for others ................................................................ |
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Rae,
You are a nice looking woman and your profile says you like laughter and honesty. So you need to move on with your life, same as everybody else has said. He just wasn't that into you. This is his loss, not yours, because it sounds like he has control issues too. BTW I lived in El Cajon in San Diego and passed through Lemon Grove all the time! 
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Maybe I'm the one
Maybe I'm the one who is the schizophrenic psycho (yeah) |
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Edited by
AGoodGuy1026
on
Fri 08/19/11 08:42 AM
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sounds to me that you both are not on the same page and don't communicate well, and YOU seem prone to drama...
seems to me he is where he is emotionally and you want more (or at least someone to toy with), so --- you goaded a reaction from him by taking picutures with another guy - and then plahing the facebook drama... then, after it went badly you did not want to hear the reaction and or results of your... welll... drama, drama, drama... (GONE!)... seems HE dodged a bullet on this one! $.02 
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Sweetie pls ur guy is just a joke. pls move on @_@
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I like what ese said. I mean if you have to to kiss *** to keep a relationship then you have a *** kissing relationship. Kind of degrading to a person. As has has been said here before he may not be that into to you but may be that into someone else.
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sounds to me that you both are not on the same page and don't communicate well, and YOU seem prone to drama... seems to me he is where he is emotionally and you want more (or at least someone to toy with), so --- you goaded a reaction from him by taking picutures with another guy - and then plahing the facebook drama... then, after it went badly you did not want to hear the reaction and or results of your... welll... drama, drama, drama... (GONE!)... seems HE dodged a bullet on this one! $.02 Maybe you have more information than what she posted? Her man has given her no indication of where they stand as a couple....even when she requested that. Its not drama drama drama. Its no comittment, contact, or acceptance. I can only assume you mean that she should hide in a box when he is not with her, or cut all ties to friendships now that they are in a flimsy relationship together where he doesnt have to give her any indication of what they have. I date quite a it. Usually I meet a guy and am eh! But not this one. I can't even pin why but I just really liked this one. But yes I feel he did play games. I already told him prior that I feel he is hot and cold and hard to read. 1 minute he says he wants to pursue something serious but then the next minute he blows me off and seems uninterested that it is confusing......and does make me think he is playing field. 1+1 = 3 kinda nonsense! The bottom line if he is only interested in fun then say so. I am no NUN. But if he wants more it is not fair to feed me BS. He had said that he feels same way toward me that I am hot and cold. Typical flip the script BS. We had both agreed that our communications were off and would work on it. Still he never stepped up to the plate to make it exclusive of any kind instead the hot cold saga continued. And the facebook drama as you say was not ever done intentionally. My friends did all of that as an inside joke and tagged me in it. I have guy friends and many photos of me and "friends" on there. What He got pissed over was the photo caption "cute couple" and the fact I didnt post that I had a man (him) which I never even knew he was my man. All Pretty lame if you ask me and just unfortunate. Overall I do agree he has some insecurity issues and control issues.....it is all his way or highway which is not the type of guy I would want to be with to begin with. If it wasn't this it would be something else a week from now I know. So it is for the best realistically. I still feel conflicted so to speak since he messed with my mind and played with my emotions GOOD....its been a flipping merry go round of BS. I do not wish to play his game so hopefully he won't call Maybe I am the psycho for liking a DB.....IDK! AYE AYE DATING TALES ~ |
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sounds to me that you both are not on the same page and don't communicate well, and YOU seem prone to drama... seems to me he is where he is emotionally and you want more (or at least someone to toy with), so --- you goaded a reaction from him by taking picutures with another guy - and then plahing the facebook drama... then, after it went badly you did not want to hear the reaction and or results of your... welll... drama, drama, drama... (GONE!)... seems HE dodged a bullet on this one! $.02 Maybe you have more information than what she posted? Her man has given her no indication of where they stand as a couple....even when she requested that. Its not drama drama drama. Its no comittment, contact, or acceptance. I can only assume you mean that she should hide in a box when he is not with her, or cut all ties to friendships now that they are in a flimsy relationship together where he doesnt have to give her any indication of what they have. I date quite a it. Usually I meet a guy and am eh! But not this one. I can't even pin why but I just really liked this one. But yes I feel he did play games. I already told him prior that I feel he is hot and cold and hard to read. 1 minute he says he wants to pursue something serious but then the next minute he blows me off and seems uninterested that it is confusing......and does make me think he is playing field. 1+1 = 3 kinda nonsense! The bottom line if he is only interested in fun then say so. I am no NUN. But if he wants more it is not fair to feed me BS. He had said that he feels same way toward me that I am hot and cold. Typical flip the script BS. We had both agreed that our communications were off and would work on it. Still he never stepped up to the plate to make it exclusive of any kind instead the hot cold saga continued. And the facebook drama as you say was not ever done intentionally. My friends did all of that as an inside joke and tagged me in it. I have guy friends and many photos of me and "friends" on there. What He got pissed over was the photo caption "cute couple" and the fact I didnt post that I had a man (him) which I never even knew he was my man. All Pretty lame if you ask me and just unfortunate. Overall I do agree he has some insecurity issues and control issues.....it is all his way or highway which is not the type of guy I would want to be with to begin with. If it wasn't this it would be something else a week from now I know. So it is for the best realistically. I still feel conflicted so to speak since he messed with my mind and played with my emotions GOOD....its been a flipping merry go round of BS. I do not wish to play his game so hopefully he won't call Maybe I am the psycho for liking a DB.....IDK! AYE AYE DATING TALES ~ Thanks Minglers for letting Me VENT!! |
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sounds to me that you both are not on the same page and don't communicate well, and YOU seem prone to drama... seems to me he is where he is emotionally and you want more (or at least someone to toy with), so --- you goaded a reaction from him by taking picutures with another guy - and then plahing the facebook drama... then, after it went badly you did not want to hear the reaction and or results of your... welll... drama, drama, drama... (GONE!)... seems HE dodged a bullet on this one! $.02 Maybe you have more information than what she posted? Her man has given her no indication of where they stand as a couple....even when she requested that. Its not drama drama drama. Its no comittment, contact, or acceptance. I can only assume you mean that she should hide in a box when he is not with her, or cut all ties to friendships now that they are in a flimsy relationship together where he doesnt have to give her any indication of what they have. I date quite a it. Usually I meet a guy and am eh! But not this one. I can't even pin why but I just really liked this one. But yes I feel he did play games. I already told him prior that I feel he is hot and cold and hard to read. 1 minute he says he wants to pursue something serious but then the next minute he blows me off and seems uninterested that it is confusing......and does make me think he is playing field. 1+1 = 3 kinda nonsense! The bottom line if he is only interested in fun then say so. I am no NUN. But if he wants more it is not fair to feed me BS. He had said that he feels same way toward me that I am hot and cold. Typical flip the script BS. We had both agreed that our communications were off and would work on it. Still he never stepped up to the plate to make it exclusive of any kind instead the hot cold saga continued. And the facebook drama as you say was not ever done intentionally. My friends did all of that as an inside joke and tagged me in it. I have guy friends and many photos of me and "friends" on there. What He got pissed over was the photo caption "cute couple" and the fact I didnt post that I had a man (him) which I never even knew he was my man. All Pretty lame if you ask me and just unfortunate. Overall I do agree he has some insecurity issues and control issues.....it is all his way or highway which is not the type of guy I would want to be with to begin with. If it wasn't this it would be something else a week from now I know. So it is for the best realistically. I still feel conflicted so to speak since he messed with my mind and played with my emotions GOOD....its been a flipping merry go round of BS. I do not wish to play his game so hopefully he won't call Maybe I am the psycho for liking a DB.....IDK! AYE AYE DATING TALES ~ I don't know either of you, but reading your original post - eh, still sounds to me like you are being (with him at least) needy and a drama queen.... Sounds like he ran for the hills when he had the chance. Smart man! Drama sucks... (hmmm, wasn't there just a post about emotional vampires)?!?!?!? $.02
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FaceBook is the Debil!
You know how many "misunderstandings" I've seen from ppl with FB accounts? Whole families ripped apart.... to New couples sabotaged by others. Close that account and live better I say! Good luck! |
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He must wear a hat over his tiara, otherwise you would of known he's just a drama queen.Ese is right, he's just playing you.
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