Hi folks,

I've written quite a few messages but haven't received a single answer. I revised my profile yet again as well as changing the photo.

What's up? Am I hideous? I realize that at 56, I look my age, but on the other hand I watch my weight, dress well, and take care of my hair and skin.

As for the profile, I don't think I'm asking too much. I'm not hunting for a man to support me. I don't even need to be wined and dined in high style. I'm more the handpicked wildflowers than roses type.

I would really appreciate any advice -- especially from guys in my age group. Don't spare my feelings; if you think I ought to check myself into the nearest Home for the Decrepit, say so.

Your profile looks fine to me. Maybe add a little more about you? Your 'marital status' might throw some people off? It might be possible that there's something about your emails that aren't interesting people? Or your just mailing people who aren't active here?

it's not you, it's not the profile, it's not anything within your power to change (sort of). old cats are usually set in their ways and in their location. sometimes for an old cat next door is too far to go and too close for comfort. yet there is hope pretty lady. hit the forums and chat it up. some lucky cat will notice your posts and send a message. soon enough he will be knocking on your door and you will wonder why the heck you wanted to share the remote in the first place

Thanks, you guys rock! Since you've been nice enough to offer some pointers, can I ask another question? As a man, are you put off by a woman who writes too much? Thing is, I'm a writer by trade, and I was trained to be thorough in the amount of information I give. So when I send a guy a message, I tell him why his profile drew me and then I say more about myself. Maybe I'm babbling too much?

HUGE hugs to you for helping me!

It depends on what you consider by write too much. If you mean constantly answering a simple 'yes/no' question with a 90 page report, then sometimes it is. I have a habit of doing that sometimes. If you mean that you go into too much detail about things, once again, sometimes it is. For instance, if somebody asks what you've been up to and you recite a second by second outline of every single mundane thing you've done for the last 10 years, that could turn off some people....

Nah, I usually limit the reports to five years.

Oh, and I omit all mention of bodily functions.

Oh! Just as long as it's only 5 years then you're good to go.

Hey, never underestimate the power of a good bodily function story. However, not all people have favorable reactions to them.......

I recognized your name from the few Forum posts you've had, so I took a look.

Your profile seems absolutely fine. The marriage status might be a problem as previously pointed out. I tend to think Ese hit closer to the mark.

I've noticed a rise in younger people joining Mingle rather than those in their 30s, 40s, or 50s. To me, it is more a numbers game, and even then location wittles it down even more.

So, Ese is right. It had nothing to do with you or your profile. More activity in the Forums can get you noticed by those who might take interest. In fact, if someone new joins who is willing to relocate, it will get you noticed even quicker. What do you have to lose?

You'll be fine. It just takes time.

for you

I would keep your profile short and sweet just like you. Not to worry, I have noticed that it takes a little longer to get noticed the older I get. People over 40 are usually married or in a long term relationships. I keep telling myself to hang in there and, someday I will meet my match. Your a beautiful woman, don't give up

thank you all for your kind words and encouragement!

Just wanted to say, you're not alone. The same thing is happening to me too. You look and sound fantastic.

:I've written quite a few messages but haven't received a single answer.


Ha! That's my experience on every dating site, paid or not.

I find that if I don't write, I don't expect an answer.

You're a writer, why don't you post more and let people get to know you?

I understand. You seem quite friendly. Don't let your age stop you. If i'm still single by the time i reach your age i'll still be living it up. I bet you have quite a youthful soul. It's just stigma really if people think people your age should sit about in nursing homes. You go get em girl ;)

I actually do have a pretty youthful soul...I usually joke that I am 56 going on 12. Not that I am immature; rather, I still have the sense of wonder that children have. Also, I tend to be more naive and trusting than most people my age.

Your profile sounds fine to me. I guess the best advice I can give you is to start posting in the forums so that people can get to know you. Best of luck to you

You do leave one question unanswered in your profile. What do you do with kittens when they're no longer tiny?

Don't worry about being rated. It's better to attract one person a year who's like you than 50 a week who aren't. The perfect person won't be easy to find.

If you know what most of these sites are about, the great majority of men aren't looking for a relationship at all -- at least not in the sense women would describe it. They're actually looking for a quick night with a woman 20 to 54 years younger.

So sit back and wait for the perfect man. I sincerely believe that there's someone for everyone and that truly compatible people are hard to find. If you're hoping to hear from one of the "dime a dozen" types of guys, (that is, Mr. Super sex hero who claims he can please a woman better than any other man) you could easily find him in a local bar.

Honey, your pics are lovely and your profile is perfect!
I'd date you in a heartbeat!

Have a lovely winter ;)

i dont think its anything to do with your age lovely, im 22 and have been on a few dating sites. ive been on here for a few months with something like 2 replys out of 20. people find it a lot harder to open thier arms to someone through a computer screen, unless everything about them is 'perfect' but don't let it put you off. Your profile is fantastic and your pictures are very tasteful. Your match is out there somewhere it just takes time, best of luck finding them!!