Hi all. So, I was wondering what everyone's opinions to weight and obesity are. I was in the park yesterday and saw a very overweight family. All six of them were huge. I felt a bit sad, but the kids looked happy. Anyway that's going off track. Should people just be accepted no matter what size they are? Does health not neccessarily mean happiness and that some bigger people like being big?

Personally, in the last year since leaving uni I have gone from a size ten to a twelve/fourteen and I hate it! Wish I had a bit more confidence like some other people have.

Guys are especially welcome to wade in with answers to the old debate: sexiest size for a woman and why?

Thanks for your answers,

Xlilix

Not all people "wear" their weight well. By that I mean how their weight is distributed. I'm 6'2" 290-300lbs, and I've had alot of people not believe I weight that much because of my build.

They say it's genetic, but I only believe that to an extent. I've seen a majority of family members that are smaller only to have a couple who are larger, and vice versa.

People as a whole look down on larger people, especially those that qualify as morbidly obese. As a larger built man I tend to get messed with myself from time to time from people I know.

I've seen some women that were a little heavier that I found attractive, mainly because of how their weight was proportional to their build.

Some people have a hard time dealing with their weight, from a weight loss standpoint. It seems no matter how hard they try the weight just doesn't seem to come off. These people I can sympathise with, at least their trying.

The sexiest size for a woman is the one SHE is most comfortable with despite what all the health nut hype is about.
1. How does she look? (First impression)
That can be anything from her hair to her toes.

Easternsquirrel that is a really good answer! If only the media and the health nuts would think that way huh?

"looks" have a lot to do with attitude... a woman can be big and have a great attitude, and be prettier than a lot of thin women with bad attitudes....

Herein lies the problem.
You refer to the healthy, as 'nuts.'
Not a great justification.

I think you'll find that there are guys who like just skinny women and guys who aren't nearly as picky. Either way, you have to be able to be comfortable with yourself. Confidence is a turn on for many.

Well it is just a turn of phrase you know. I think some people do indeed go too far with it all. And I am not insulting the health-concious at all, since I myself am quite health-concious. I'm basicly saying that there are people out there that will class you as obese due to a limited and rather flawed system of body mass index that doesn't even take into account your excercise levels and bone structure.

Some people are told they are to big based on bmi which I think is a load of bs!

Permit me to clarify:
I said "health nuts".
I did not say or insinuate that the healthy are nuts.

Look at the reality of it. All the disks, tapes, equipment, gyms, etc, etc are there because they're making MONEY at your expense.
In as much, they are doing a good job of brainwashing a gullible public into thinking that a certain body size/type is "sexy".
That is BS.
You would receive a far better benefit from a walk in the forrest, or a day at the beach.

Everyone has their preferences to what their ideal partner should be, but there's some who only date someone with blonde hair, some only date someone who is tall, short, heavy, petite, ect.... They're more stuck on physical aspects and/or material things. They are classified as "shallow", they won't give someone a chance if they do not fit into their superficial criteria.

Then you have some who are picky as to who they date because of their criteria, but not limited totally 100% to it. For instance they'll date someone who is blonde, but a little overweight, where they usually prefer someone a bit smaller. Still shallow to an extent.

Then you have those who have their preferences, but are more fixed on who the person is over physical traits. I like to think I fall into this catagory. For example....I've always like taller women, I mean I am 6'2". But I've dated someone before who was only 5'1" because I liked them over their height. I've always liked blonde hair, but I have dated someone who had brown hair, once again because of them not their hair color. I've dated thinner women and women who were somewhat thicker, it was them not their size that had drawn me in.

I mean there's nothing wrong with having standards, such as wanting someone who is honest, faithful, hardworking, ect.... There's nothing wrong with desiring someone who has outer beauty, but so long as they have inner beauty. I guess as long as you have someone who has what you want, there's nothing wrong with that. But there's so many people who extremely limit themselves that they wind up unhappy because they might find someone physically beautiful to their standards, but ugly inside as a person.

A person just needs to look inside themselves and be happy with who they are. And that's not saying that all fat people are ugly - I've seen some women with a little extra weight that are very beautiful! It all comes down to this, I think: If you don't love who you are inside already, being skinny will never make you happy. Because then you'll just find some other aspect of yourself to be disappointed in (your hair frizzes, you have a vein that sticks out in your hand, wide ankles, whatever).

Stop looking in the mirror and look inside yourself. Are you a good person?

well said

Thanks ohiostate13...


Happiness should not be determined by a number, a weight, a measurement or what is "fat" and what is "thin". Accept yourself for all your lumps and bumps or even lack there-of, sometimes. Your weight should be a matter in measuring health, not happiness. If you're obese or overweight, then you can aim to get to a healthy range, and take yourself out of the danger zone. If you're underweight or verging on it, you should probably look to gain to avoid all the perils of being underweight. But never, ever, should you be having to look in the mirror and think, "My outside appearance makes me who I am."

What bothers me the most about this topic is a lot of people are judemental about a person's size. What I've noticed is a lot of people assume that someone is lazy or on drugs because someone is too big or too small.
I've come across people who were big due to thyroid condition,medications or their metabolism is off kiter..the same can be said for a small person where the thyroid is too high making their metabilsm run extremly fast...to me,weight can be earned or lost..it is as simple as going to the doctors to get checked or simply asking someone if they wanna go for a walk with you.

> sexiest size for a woman

Without getting into the OT "you can be as big as you want to be in spite of the health risks, as long as you are happy. You go girl" drivel (oops, I just did), I'll say I prefer 'rounder' women. (not scrawny, not obese)

> and why?

Um, I just like a round feminine shape. They're snuggly

I hope you're not stressing because you don't look like a supermodel. Even most supermodels don't look like supermodels without a lot of (dangerous?) 'work'.

I dig big beefy men...

I totally agree that our culture is unhealthily obsessed with some unattainable (airbrushed, surgery/pill-obtained) ideal of physical beauty! (the last time an entire country was motivated to ALL get in shape was Germany in 1939 - and that didn't turn out so well).
I have been fat and thin, and both came with benefits. When thin, I've got more energy, I am more positive, and yes, I feel better about myself physically, but when I'm fatter, I'm more in touch with my sensuality; food tastes better, soft sheets feel better, etc.
There's also the same prejudice regarding age I've noticed... I have earned every wrinkle I've got through my life experiences which stamped those expressions on my face! Thankfully, the most prominent are laugh lines . I don't understand why we worship youth so much! There is so much of worth and value which the current culture miss, because no one is interested in people over a certain age. It's a shame, really.

If you think you are ugly...everyone else will see it and think it too.

If you know you are beautiful...the world will happily believe it and think you are as well.

All my Dude friends think I am just flat out ugly...and are stunned at how much female atention that I get.

I agree with them...I ain't a beautiful man. But, I know that I am good enough for ANYONE....and that attitude is what people find attractive.

When you know that you are good enough to pick and choose who you are willing to give yourself to...THEN.. you can have anyone your heart desires.

But, if you won't believe in yourself...don't expect anyone to believe in yourself for you.

Superficially....in an ideal fantasy, men need to be fit, toned and remotely able to get about in their bodies....to catch my superficial eye.

A bloke who looks like a sackfull of walnuts doesn't do it for me....so put down those steroids now.


A woman who has curves....who has that lush rubenesque figure is to die for...(I love the female form, but am not sexually attracted to it)


How someone carries themselves speaks volumes to me... a person who is comfortable in their own skin, comfortable in their sexuality, shows... and I find it incredibly attractive.

Thank-you, Jess!! That's who I was trying to think of when I posted earlier- P. Rubens
While a lot of his stuff used shadows and made the gals look 'bumpy' (I wonder if he was trying to say something...), works like 'The Fall of Man' (one of my favs) are what I wanted to reference. Here's a look-
http://www.peterpaulrubens.org/The-Fall-Of-Man.html

Now, that's round and lucious. How you gals keep from becoming lesbians is beyond me.