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Topic: Living arrangements
BDBoop's photo
Fri 12/17/10 02:46 AM
Edited by BDBoop on Fri 12/17/10 02:52 AM
At the ripe old age of 52 (THANKS, TIM!) I find myself living with five roommates. I had my own place for 18 months, but the nature of my work precludes me having very high overhead, so here I am.

Considering I spent a decade or two looking at housing developments as "People in a box", and apartments as just COMPLETELY unacceptable, where I am now is just mind-boggling to me. But it's in a good way! I wound up adapting in ways I never thought I could - guess I was not giving myself enough credit.

Anyway, that led me to wonder. Is everybody here in their own place, or living with family, or roommates, or what?

P.S.: I hope to have a dog soon. I miss my girls madly.


angel_or_demon's photo
Fri 12/17/10 03:01 AM
I think there are times in many peoples lives that they find themselves where they had said 'that will never be me', but this is all part of learning.
I have moved house 43 times, not through choice but through lifes circumstances and that has taught me to be adaptable.
I have also shared with other people to make ends meet, this can be hard for one that likes their own space. And you have to adapt to the ways of people around you to live in harmony.
I had my own house, with space. It was beautiful and all I wanted, something I could finally call home, but life was not good for me in many ways so I sold my beautiful home and everything in it to find a better life and in doing so have moved somewhere where I don't have space very often, the electric keeps going, you hear everyone getting on with their life and whether It was a right decision or a wrong one to make. What an experience.
I'm sure you must miss you dogs as they are great home makers and better companions than many people I know.
Good luck and I do believe that these changes make you a better, more compassionate and stronger person

no photo
Fri 12/17/10 03:37 AM
let the dead bury the dead. i took that to mean life goes on. chit happens to everyone. it overwelms some and they become complacent. it challenges others and they strive to better their situation. worse off others just quit. thing is, it is important to realize that you are not alone. (we all need somebody to lean on) there are people out there going through situations just like you. adapt, improvise, overcome. if you can not discipline yourself to do that, then find others who have. look around you, become part of a group that is where you want to be. you are still young enough and free to spread your wings. sample life, do what you like twice

Beachfarmer's photo
Fri 12/17/10 03:44 AM
You have LIVED BDBoop...YOU HAVE LIVED!flowerforyou

For as menial and trite as that sounds, the truth rings.flowerforyou

LOVE your honesty!!!!

krupa's photo
Fri 12/17/10 03:50 AM
Look at the positives...

when you are making breakfast in your underwear and singing "Play that funky music white boy", at least you have an audience. My dogs just look at each other and say ..."Again? Really?"


I live alone and I have adopted my brothers mode of thinking....I have my place, you have yours. You get ONE drawer...that's it! You bring anything into my house that wont fit in your drawer...kick your own @$$ to the curb.

newarkjw's photo
Fri 12/17/10 03:55 AM

Look at the positives...

when you are making breakfast in your underwear and singing "Play that funky music white boy", at least you have an audience. My dogs just look at each other and say ..."Again? Really?"


I live alone and I have adopted my brothers mode of thinking....I have my place, you have yours. You get ONE drawer...that's it! You bring anything into my house that wont fit in your drawer...kick your own @$$ to the curb.


My Mom tells me all the time that if I meet someone only let her bring over a toothbrush......smokin

Beachfarmer's photo
Fri 12/17/10 04:04 AM
ohwell oh well, theres at least 3 (take'em or leave'em) opinions that allow you to be at least "flippant" in your own home.

krupa's photo
Fri 12/17/10 04:18 AM
"Flippant"????

I aint that talented. The best I can manage is cartwheels and monkey rolls. Freaks the dogs out tho. Too much stuff flapping and slapping around.

mssilverfox's photo
Fri 12/17/10 04:26 AM
After being married 26 yrs I am once again on my own( lost my husband in 07)..I choose to rent an apartment so I don't have to mow grass and shovel snow.. I have moved about 30 times in my life, once packing up my kids and moving across country without having a job or a place to live when I got there..You just have to be able to adapt and I think I am a stronger and more independent person because of it...I am a survivor!! bigsmile

Beachfarmer's photo
Fri 12/17/10 04:27 AM

At the ripe old age of 52 (THANKS, TIM!) I find myself living with five roommates. I had my own place for 18 months, but the nature of my work precludes me having very high overhead, so here I am.

Considering I spent a decade or two looking at housing developments as "People in a box", and apartments as just COMPLETELY unacceptable, where I am now is just mind-boggling to me. But it's in a good way! I wound up adapting in ways I never thought I could - guess I was not giving myself enough credit.

Anyway, that led me to wonder. Is everybody here in their own place, or living with family, or roommates, or what?

P.S.: I hope to have a dog soon. I miss my girls madly.




I miss my ol pups too!!!!:heart:

Ol roomates? I just want to flap'em and slapp'em around.

TxsGal3333's photo
Fri 12/17/10 06:49 AM
We all at one time or other find out selves in a situation that we had never expected to be. What we do with that situation is up to us. I found myself in a similar situation as you have but it was almost 20 years ago I had two small kids that I had to worry about.

What did I do shshs I got the divorce myself and made sure the house had to be sold it was almost paid for therefore we split the profit. Which gave me a good start used it wisely and put the down payment down on another house for me and the kids one that I could afford. It is and older home but one I could pay with what I made and be able to raise two kids.

Where there is a will there is a way...............

Yeah my kids are grown now and for the first time in many years I do live alone well besides the dogs...

And yeah I'm with the guys on this one more then a drawer and ya better take a look at whats up.....


unsure's photo
Fri 12/17/10 07:18 AM
Edited by unsure on Fri 12/17/10 07:22 AM
When I got my divorce about 14 years ago, I happily walked away without the house. I moved into an apartment with my 2 boys and now we have a cat. I think the main thing is to be happy in your life, If you live in a house or an apartment..who cares, be content with what you have because you can't take it with you!!

Gossipmpm's photo
Fri 12/17/10 07:25 AM
Like I teLl my girls:

Wherever you land

At any part of your life

Becomes home

You fill the space

With your love
Your personality

Weather rich. Poor. Or in-between

Home is what only you can make it!!:heart:

BDBoop's photo
Fri 12/17/10 11:15 AM
I love all these answers. Lots of wisdom and humor in here!

The 4.5 months I spent with my sister and her partner was hard on all of us. I was used to my own home, and they were too. I tried to stay out of the way as much as possible, and they were gentle with me for the most part. Hell, my life just 'sploded! But we also gained some memories that we never would have had, if I'd been left dying in my marriage. *yes, that's how it ended. We had 12 great, wonderful years and then one unraveling one*

Anyway, re: the freedom. My sister's partner has been known to fry bacon nude. She missed that activity while I was living there. Orly? See, I don't have the cojones to attempt that kind of activity. I can see shifting and reshaping your activity, but all it takes is one flying drop of sizzling oil on a nipple. That's all I'm sayin.

Gossipmpm's photo
Fri 12/17/10 11:22 AM
:heart: Now see...

A girl like me....


Would find that highly erotic.....haha

Beachfarmer's photo
Fri 12/17/10 11:24 AM
love ooooooh on cajones too for that matter

TheShadow's photo
Fri 12/17/10 11:40 AM
I'm on my own right now, but in a couple months if things go, ill be moving back to cali with my son. Ill have to move back to my dads for a couple months, but will be on my own again.

BDBoop's photo
Fri 12/17/10 11:43 AM

I'm on my own right now, but in a couple months if things go, ill be moving back to cali with my son. Ill have to move back to my dads for a couple months, but will be on my own again.


"Own" is nice. I have PTSD so all the little 'shocks' of living with other people can add up during the bad times.

willing2's photo
Fri 12/17/10 11:47 AM
I'm an orphan.

I live with my dog, 2 hens, a rooster and 9 rabbits.

I would live in a shack in the woods before an apartment.

Don't much care for cell living.

EquusDancer's photo
Fri 12/17/10 11:49 AM
I moved home several years after doing the apartment thing. I hope to eventually put a cabin up on the back of the property. I missed the country, and won't leave it again, and I like the freedom of space, and having the animals I want. No way I could tolerate the city again, even suburbs.

The family thing can be frustrating sometimes, but works out well for everyone. My dad travels more for work, and is gone for weeks and months at a time, so I get to take care of the place. Mom has MS, and isn't as comfortable dealing with the animals and risking getting bumped around or knocked down, by exuberant horses, goats, or cattle.

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