Topic: Marriage.......WHY??????
no photo
Sun 12/05/10 02:50 PM

I know that, when I was in my 20's, and my friends were getting married, the main reason they decided to do it was because it was "The Next Step". I never understood why a reason like that would warrant two people to marry. And, as it stands, the majority of those who got married then are now divorced.

I believe people don't truly know what love is anymore. They think they do, but as the statsitcs show, they don't. Love isn't just about great sex. And a marriage can't be based on that either. Don't get me wrong. Sex is important, and if it waivers then it usually leads to adultery from one of the spouses. Love, however, is about something more. It's this feeling that cannot be explained. That sounds corny, but in all honesty, it is true. We all want that feeling, even if we say we don't, I believe all of us want to find that someone who will love us like we believe we should be loved. And love them back in that same very way.

True. You don't have to be married to be in love. To me, marriage is a symbol of the devotion, the committment...a public display of your affection to this one person that he or she is the one person you want to be with....until death do you part. Faith plays a part in why most people do get married. Some even look at the tax breaks of it. But for me, I would only marry for that one person who I could look at and honestly say to myself....she is the one and I want no other.

Anyway, enough mushy stuff. Bring on the sluts! laugh



great post - exactly goof!! It's that feeling like - ur done looking u dont wanna be with anyone else- that's why one of the things I look for in a guy is that he treats me like I am the only one in the room (and vice versa of course)

I am hoping now that I am older I can do a better job at this love thang, should I be lucky enough to get another chance. When I read your post I saw all kinda things I coulda done better. I was too selfish in my 20s. I love this post goof, it's great - damm nation any way Ima starting to cry...thanks goof

Goofball73's photo
Sun 12/05/10 05:21 PM


I know that, when I was in my 20's, and my friends were getting married, the main reason they decided to do it was because it was "The Next Step". I never understood why a reason like that would warrant two people to marry. And, as it stands, the majority of those who got married then are now divorced.

I believe people don't truly know what love is anymore. They think they do, but as the statsitcs show, they don't. Love isn't just about great sex. And a marriage can't be based on that either. Don't get me wrong. Sex is important, and if it waivers then it usually leads to adultery from one of the spouses. Love, however, is about something more. It's this feeling that cannot be explained. That sounds corny, but in all honesty, it is true. We all want that feeling, even if we say we don't, I believe all of us want to find that someone who will love us like we believe we should be loved. And love them back in that same very way.

True. You don't have to be married to be in love. To me, marriage is a symbol of the devotion, the committment...a public display of your affection to this one person that he or she is the one person you want to be with....until death do you part. Faith plays a part in why most people do get married. Some even look at the tax breaks of it. But for me, I would only marry for that one person who I could look at and honestly say to myself....she is the one and I want no other.

Anyway, enough mushy stuff. Bring on the sluts! laugh



great post - exactly goof!! It's that feeling like - ur done looking u dont wanna be with anyone else- that's why one of the things I look for in a guy is that he treats me like I am the only one in the room (and vice versa of course)

I am hoping now that I am older I can do a better job at this love thang, should I be lucky enough to get another chance. When I read your post I saw all kinda things I coulda done better. I was too selfish in my 20s. I love this post goof, it's great - damm nation any way Ima starting to cry...thanks goof



I rule!! Haha!

Ok, so what I learned from Krupa is to let the chicks get you drunk and then allow them to have there way with me. Brillian!
:thumbsup:

krupa's photo
Sun 12/05/10 05:26 PM



I was married and i dont regret it. I learned a lot from it.
I would do it again.
I think im just romantic.:heart:


I am romantical too! I love letting a woman get me drunk to have her way with me!

haha So if i wanted to have my way with u i would have to get u drunk first?


Naw....just being in the same room pretty much gaurantees success.

no photo
Sun 12/05/10 05:33 PM



I know that, when I was in my 20's, and my friends were getting married, the main reason they decided to do it was because it was "The Next Step". I never understood why a reason like that would warrant two people to marry. And, as it stands, the majority of those who got married then are now divorced.

I believe people don't truly know what love is anymore. They think they do, but as the statsitcs show, they don't. Love isn't just about great sex. And a marriage can't be based on that either. Don't get me wrong. Sex is important, and if it waivers then it usually leads to adultery from one of the spouses. Love, however, is about something more. It's this feeling that cannot be explained. That sounds corny, but in all honesty, it is true. We all want that feeling, even if we say we don't, I believe all of us want to find that someone who will love us like we believe we should be loved. And love them back in that same very way.

True. You don't have to be married to be in love. To me, marriage is a symbol of the devotion, the committment...a public display of your affection to this one person that he or she is the one person you want to be with....until death do you part. Faith plays a part in why most people do get married. Some even look at the tax breaks of it. But for me, I would only marry for that one person who I could look at and honestly say to myself....she is the one and I want no other.

Anyway, enough mushy stuff. Bring on the sluts! laugh



great post - exactly goof!! It's that feeling like - ur done looking u dont wanna be with anyone else- that's why one of the things I look for in a guy is that he treats me like I am the only one in the room (and vice versa of course)

I am hoping now that I am older I can do a better job at this love thang, should I be lucky enough to get another chance. When I read your post I saw all kinda things I coulda done better. I was too selfish in my 20s. I love this post goof, it's great - damm nation any way Ima starting to cry...thanks goof



I rule!! Haha!

Ok, so what I learned from Krupa is to let the chicks get you drunk and then allow them to have there way with me. Brillian!
:thumbsup:


well I was kinda not reading the bring on the sluts stuff....men - sheeshnoway

newarkjw's photo
Sun 12/05/10 05:38 PM
I tried the marriage gig twice over the last 25 years. I have lost half my chit twice. Which leaves me with 25 percent of the chit I had. Spooky huh?..........smokin

IndnPrncs's photo
Sun 12/05/10 05:41 PM

I tried the marriage gig twice over the last 25 years. I have lost half my chit twice. Which leaves me with 25 percent of the chit I had. Spooky huh?..........smokin


Awww Jeff I'm sure you've gained enough back that you need to get rid of some again.. laugh laugh laugh

Goofball73's photo
Sun 12/05/10 05:42 PM


I tried the marriage gig twice over the last 25 years. I have lost half my chit twice. Which leaves me with 25 percent of the chit I had. Spooky huh?..........smokin


Awww Jeff I'm sure you've gained enough back that you need to get rid of some again.. laugh laugh laugh


rofl rofl rofl rofl

no photo
Sun 12/05/10 06:02 PM
marriage...a patriarchal institution designed to insure heredity by enslavement of womens wombs...glorified to the extent that to this day most women consider their self-imposed slavery as one of the "happiest days of their lives"...

no thanks...not for me.
noway

newarkjw's photo
Sun 12/05/10 06:12 PM


I tried the marriage gig twice over the last 25 years. I have lost half my chit twice. Which leaves me with 25 percent of the chit I had. Spooky huh?..........smokin


Awww Jeff I'm sure you've gained enough back that you need to get rid of some again.. laugh laugh laugh


Hell no. I just got new bumpers on my pool table.....smokin

IndnPrncs's photo
Sun 12/05/10 06:16 PM



I tried the marriage gig twice over the last 25 years. I have lost half my chit twice. Which leaves me with 25 percent of the chit I had. Spooky huh?..........smokin


Awww Jeff I'm sure you've gained enough back that you need to get rid of some again.. laugh laugh laugh


Hell no. I just got new bumpers on my pool table.....smokin


Make her sign a pre-nup that the pool table and it's accessories are off limits bigsmile

no photo
Sun 12/05/10 06:52 PM

marriage...a patriarchal institution designed to insure heredity by enslavement of womens wombs...glorified to the extent that to this day most women consider their self-imposed slavery as one of the "happiest days of their lives"...

no thanks...not for me.
noway
I vascillate in that direction from time to time = kinda like how bogie and bacall did it:wink:

msharmony's photo
Sun 12/05/10 11:54 PM


marriage...a patriarchal institution designed to insure heredity by enslavement of womens wombs...glorified to the extent that to this day most women consider their self-imposed slavery as one of the "happiest days of their lives"...

no thanks...not for me.
noway
I vascillate in that direction from time to time = kinda like how bogie and bacall did it:wink:


yeah, I kind of think FREEDOM isnt really gained by anyone until after death, ,,everyone has to ANSWER to someone or something and most consider that slavery when its just a part of life

If Im answering to someone who is answering to THE ONE, than I am in good hands,,,,as they are with me

josie68's photo
Mon 12/06/10 12:03 AM
marriage definatly,
i dont hide it, i dont pretend that its not what i want, ultimately I want to share my life and love with someone, I want to belong to them and if they dont want to get married somewhere along the line, then they might as wel not look at me for anything more than friendship.
I have nothing against not being married, i just would not feel comfortable, sleeping with someone if i was not planning to marry them.

myshell711's photo
Mon 12/06/10 01:49 AM

Marriage is a wonderful institution. If you like institutions.......smokin


I agree with this.I find it to be institutionalized..but that's my personal opinion....:)

Citizen_Joe's photo
Mon 12/06/10 01:51 AM

I tried the marriage gig twice over the last 25 years. I have lost half my chit twice. Which leaves me with 25 percent of the chit I had. Spooky huh?..........smokin

2 marriages and 1 ltr later, I really didn't lose much, but have noted that specific things were always replaced, usually early in the relationships. Sofas and beds. About the only major thing that was replaced in the past year has been a fridge and a few light bulbs, and I've only rarely slept in my California King.

no photo
Mon 12/06/10 06:15 AM
For some people marriage is important, Shows everyone that commitment. Me personally , Been there/ done that (um three times) All three times the man I was married to decided that he wanted to do whatever he wanted (cheat, be counter productive, abusive). So speaking for myself, Don't see myself going down that road again. But never say never. So I look forward to love and a relationship, but a lil gun shy of the marriage thing.
I think it truly is a personal choice.

misswright's photo
Mon 12/06/10 07:10 AM
Traditional marriage evolved into companionate marriage in the '70s, mostly due to the invention of the birth control pill in 1959.

The function of marriage, initially, was for two people to form a lifelong commitment and have kids. Children symbolized success for the father and a woman's status in society was through marriage and her role as wife and mother. Divorce was considered a failure, for both parties.

Fast forward forty years. That's not true anymore.

Marriage is now based on emotional and sexual satisfaction. If either party wants out, they just leave. Children are optional, not obligatory. Divorce rates soar, marriage rates decline.

Add in the availability factor, with options for hooking up not limited to your immediate geographic location, and it's no wonder that marriage isn't what it used to be.

I've never been married. I will never be married. I don't possess the qualities that would make me marriage material, neither in the traditional or companionate sense. I'm not broken hearted about it though. I was raised to be "independent", and in that, I'm a glaring success! shades


EquusDancer's photo
Mon 12/06/10 08:45 AM

I know that, when I was in my 20's, and my friends were getting married, the main reason they decided to do it was because it was "The Next Step". I never understood why a reason like that would warrant two people to marry. And, as it stands, the majority of those who got married then are now divorced.

I believe people don't truly know what love is anymore. They think they do, but as the statsitcs show, they don't. Love isn't just about great sex. And a marriage can't be based on that either. Don't get me wrong. Sex is important, and if it waivers then it usually leads to adultery from one of the spouses. Love, however, is about something more. It's this feeling that cannot be explained. That sounds corny, but in all honesty, it is true. We all want that feeling, even if we say we don't, I believe all of us want to find that someone who will love us like we believe we should be loved. And love them back in that same very way.

True. You don't have to be married to be in love. To me, marriage is a symbol of the devotion, the committment...a public display of your affection to this one person that he or she is the one person you want to be with....until death do you part. Faith plays a part in why most people do get married. Some even look at the tax breaks of it. But for me, I would only marry for that one person who I could look at and honestly say to myself....she is the one and I want no other.

Anyway, enough mushy stuff. Bring on the sluts! laugh



Nicely written Goof. I have always felt that most people married, had kids, because it was the "thing" to do. Their friends were doing it, so they would too. Even down to having children on a shedule. They never seemed truly happy with having kids, but because that's what was expected, they did it. And with everyone being so busy, they don't truly take the time to be with their kids. It's kind of sad.

no photo
Mon 12/06/10 09:00 AM


I know that, when I was in my 20's, and my friends were getting married, the main reason they decided to do it was because it was "The Next Step". I never understood why a reason like that would warrant two people to marry. And, as it stands, the majority of those who got married then are now divorced.

I believe people don't truly know what love is anymore. They think they do, but as the statsitcs show, they don't. Love isn't just about great sex. And a marriage can't be based on that either. Don't get me wrong. Sex is important, and if it waivers then it usually leads to adultery from one of the spouses. Love, however, is about something more. It's this feeling that cannot be explained. That sounds corny, but in all honesty, it is true. We all want that feeling, even if we say we don't, I believe all of us want to find that someone who will love us like we believe we should be loved. And love them back in that same very way.

True. You don't have to be married to be in love. To me, marriage is a symbol of the devotion, the committment...a public display of your affection to this one person that he or she is the one person you want to be with....until death do you part. Faith plays a part in why most people do get married. Some even look at the tax breaks of it. But for me, I would only marry for that one person who I could look at and honestly say to myself....she is the one and I want no other.

Anyway, enough mushy stuff. Bring on the sluts! laugh



Nicely written Goof. I have always felt that most people married, had kids, because it was the "thing" to do. Their friends were doing it, so they would too. Even down to having children on a shedule. They never seemed truly happy with having kids, but because that's what was expected, they did it. And with everyone being so busy, they don't truly take the time to be with their kids. It's kind of sad.


Exactly! That's what my parents did. I don't think either of them had any particular interest in having kids, it was just automatic. In retrospect, they never should have bothered.

I remember once, when I was about 9 years old, asking my Mom why she wanted me to do something or other, and she said "You'll understand when you're older and have kids of your own." Not IF, but WHEN. For a long time, I thought it was mandatory. Everybody did it, just because that was what you were supposed to do.

Years later, it still seems that the repro-mindset is virtually a universal default setting.


Goofball73's photo
Mon 12/06/10 06:27 PM
It really is sad that people did marry cause it was (a) the next step, (b) well, we have to marry if we want kids and want to be accepted by society. It was what our parents were taught, and they taught us.

A family is one thing. Marriage is between two people, man and woman, and it is all about those two people being the "end all" for one another. It's not about "Oh, we phucked so good that I want to marry him/her", or "He/she is a great person, probably the best I will ever find, so I guess I should propose cause, ya know...it's the next step". Hell, a marriage really is about a relationship that two people want, and they don't want it with anyone else. Through that, yeah, you can start a family. But, a family always starts with a man and woman, and it grows from there.

Seriously. You chicks out there ever dreamed that you would marry your Prince Charming and them have him phuck the slut next door a few years later after he tired of you? And fellas. You ever wish to marry a good hearted woman who was a freak in the sheets and then decided she didn't want to be your freak? Yeah...didn't think so. Point is.....understand what the hell love is. Goof out!