Why the need for condescension ... ? That's pretty pretentious ...

Resist all that you can, and then make the jump and go with the flow when resistance does not work anymore.

The kind of resistance I am talking about happens to everyone who does not seek and accept the truth of reality or the situation.

It is also a decision to be 'unhappy' about someone or something that is out of your control.

It is the worn out saying, "Learn to accept the things you cannot change, and have the courage to change the things you can.

Learning to tell the difference between what you can't change and what you can change is the challenge.

But I can guarantee that trying to force change on someone with free will is resistance to what they choose to be.

My original example was not directed at anyone. I was being honest. I thought of an example from my own life from long time ago. It was a lessen I learned at a very young age.... how not to be manipulated by someone who threatens to kill them self. It was a very important life lesson for me, and a simple one. I thought it would be a very good example. Just in case there was anyone reading my post who has a simple and practical approach to life.

There is nothing wrong with simplicity or simple minds. By simple minds, I am not implying stupidity. It is more of a practical or direct mind.

Yep that is usually the way it goes.

Ms. JB...that is a lovely pix of u...

I speak from experience. There r some on that don't believe me when I speak.
Resistance works in most cases, but there are times when it does not.
It is the old adage that goes...know when 2 hold um, and know when 2 fold um.
This works mainly when dealing with men. It does not work with your dog.

Tell me what you mean when you say that resistance works in most cases. Give me an example.

I'm not sure I understand what you mean, or perhaps you don't understand what I mean.

I have encountered this.

First in a situation with my first wife. She would tell me the truth of an argument and I couldn't accept it. So I would twist her words around. The important thing was to win the argument or otherwise that meant that I was wrong and she was right. After all she was the woman and I was the man. One could call that the sophistry of chauvinism. Her mother encouraged this because she told me that I needed to my foot down because her daughter was a strong willed person. Her mother referred to us both as children. My wife would go to me when she was angry at her mother and I would try to solace her. And my wife would go to her mother when she was angry at me and I am sure she would solace her. At one point though this type of arrangement started to get to my wife. She declared to me that I and her mother was tearing her apart. At one point I even asked my wife when we got into an argument if I was arguing with her or her mother since she seemed to get the most argumentative after she visited her mother. I began to wonder if my wife had a mind of her own. And at one point when she even told me that after her that question of who I was arguing with she said that I was arguing with her - her being herself. It amazed me; She had an original idea. How fascinated I was. Maybe I could actually get to know her and we could talk about something even though she was on Prozac. Maybe I would get to know the woman who ran away from her parents out of rebellion because she had wanted her own life. At one point I told her that she should choose between me and her mother. She had said it would tear her apart. It was then that I saw the reality of the situation. She already was in a relationship with her mother. Her mother even paid for the divorce and from my wife I had learned that she had paid off a former boyfriend. I got back my friendship with my mother-in-law and my ex-wife and me were friends again. Isn't ignorance bliss?

That story above is a little confusing. But I see a really medaling mother-in-law there. People need to break the apron strings from their parents before they get married. Parents need to let go and let their children live their own lives. Instead, they get involved and they resist everything they don't approve of and try to control the situation.

But this kind of control goes both ways in that the person being affected allows it to happen. It is important to know who you are and that is your decision, not your parents or you spouse. Once you decide who you are and what you want, then be true to yourself.

Being true to yourself is simply doing what your heart desires to do, making your own decisions, living the way you want to live no matter what anyone else is trying to tell you that you should do.

Live your own life. It is your life, not theirs.

I agree. And I can understand how you could see what I wrote as confusing. It was confusing trying to explain it. I thought I could fix it. There was no fixing it. Even after we got remarried after five years the problem resurfaced. Thirteen more years of this hell. Finally, we both called it a draw and then the blessed divorce. She couldn't fix me and I couldn't fix her. We shook hands at the second divorce. She asked me though if I was sure I wanted to go through with the divorce. I told her I was sure. Today, I can be true to myself even though back then it wasn't always possible to be true to her. She would get so emotional and loud. Today, thanks to that divorce I have my serenity back. I don't like resisting my serenity because my sanity finds it futile.

I am so happy for you because I am in that same place.



That is the thing that everyone tries to do. Fix each other. (to their own liking) but what they need to do is heal themselves and be themselves. Stop trying to mold someone else or live up to someone else's expectations.

Good for you! There is no reason to live in hell when you can be true to yourself. If you are lonely, get a dog or cat and some good friends. Or you can go on the Internet.

I would have gone nuts without the Internet.

Although I don't dispute the validity of your statement, but Actually, most of people are absolutely CLUELESS of Where and Why they are headed! Without others meddling into their affairs -- trying to set them straight -- those "Clueless people" would be lost! Thus we need government and police for keeping those falks under control -- without those control measures the anarchy might ensue: "living the way you want to live no matter what anyone else is trying to tell you"!!!

I hope your carefull about whom you dispense your wise advices to!

YOU ARE SO RIGHT.


The "Be yourself" advice used to really confuse me when I did not know who I was or what I wanted ..to be. (..when I grew up.. )

And you are right. For those who do not know what they want or who they are, they do not know what "be yourself" really means.

When learning about using the law of attraction to get what you want, the biggest challenge is knowing what you want. If you don't know what you want and have no imagination, you live your life sort of like a vegetable. You just soak in the sun and rain, grow and reproduce. You do what people tell you to do. You go to school, get a job, get married, have children then one day you wake up and wonder..... is that all there is? Then you regret that you did not get to do any of the things you thought you wanted to do or saw other people doing.

You are blown by the wind, manipulated by everyone, and used by people who know how to use their WILL. They will tell you how you should think and act, so you don't have to think about it or make decisions.

Without the masters, the slaves don't know what to do, they are lost.

Hence, religion has a function. Society has a function. The government has a function. That function is to shuffle you through your life so you can procreate new slaves for the empire.

Now here is the biggest secret of all.

If you are wondering what your "purpose" is in this life, I will tell you.

It is to find something to do that makes you happy. That is your ultimate and only purpose.

Happiness is your purpose.

Be happy. That is your purpose.

It is so very simple. Yet most people don't have a clue how to be happy or know how to pursue happiness.

Without resistance there would be no change.
But you have to pick your battles in order to win the war.
As Sun Tzu said, "on favorable ground attack, on unfavorable ground retreat".
It makes no sense to fight when you are out gunned.

I used to be afraid of Big Brother.

http://www.k-1.com/Orwell/index.cgi/work/summaries/1984.html

EXACTLY, And that's because most people have no clue of Who they really are! Subsequently, they don't how to pursue happiness because they don't realize that happinesss is simply a SELF-ACTUALIZATION! No wonder they can never attain happiness because there's nothing much to actualize! (except of, probably, the procreation -- that justifies their otherwise meaningless existance}.

Yeh, the morons.

Happiness is a warm bun ...

Whatever floats your boat!