She found out yesterday that he's married. But she has known for a long time that he's been with her, but he lies to her about the whole relationship.

So...where do we draw the line of getting involved with other peoples business when we don't even know them?
Complete strangers to us, only we dislike their ex which we know something about through someone we care about?
She will find out, probally already knows, maybe married him thinking he was going to settle in with her. You don't know any of her story. It's really not your place to interfere with people you don't know. Not even a acquaintance. To get at him, to hurt him by getting another hurt (his wife) is not good business.
Women are not stupid, even your friend knew but continued.

I'm sorry I got so confused Jill, maybe if I had some fake names to use, I would have followed the story better. Again, I am sorry, I really was trying to help you with some advice.

You do bring up a good point...

It's a very complicated situation!! OK... it prob woulda helped if I added fake names lol

i sent you a email

All I can say is I would want to be told. Do you think she is really that stupid not to see the signs?.......

I have no idea. All I know is how much he lied to my friend so I have to assume he lies to his now wife as well.

Tessa, I don't know you. But I can respect your opinion. I don't however appreciate the implication that I'm lying or changing my story. I have been completely honest. I have no reason to lie or change the story at all. But, your opinion is your own and you're entitled to it. Have a nice evening.

He may have been lying, but down inside she knew he was with this other person, (she chose to see only what she wanted to see) now she "knows" he is married so the only thing to do is move on. Leave him to the hands of fate.

Since you do not know his wife, you have nothing to do with the situation...leave her and her children out of your desire to hurt this guy.

Who's lyin' to who? At this point it seems hard to tell. Joe(the cheatin' bostid) might be lyin' to Sandy(friend), Sandy might be lyin' to Jill, and Joe is obviously lyin' to Barbara(wife).


There's some fake names for you, just thought I'd add some color to it.

And I agree with you newark.

Or everybody could be lying to everybody.......

ok put it this way then.
if you were in a relationship and you never knew the guy you were in love with married and you find out from a close friend that had warned you about him for quit sometime. would you tell her the same thing and continue with the relationship knowing he wouldnt leave his wife
and keep stringing you along

I hate drama. I just want to wash my hands of this and be done with it. I'm disappointed that my friend "Sandy" has let it go this far. But those are her decisions she has to live with. I just hope that he will leave her alone now. Let her move on with her life.

Let's bring this out a little, into the future. Let's just say that Sandy(friend) now knows about the marriage of Joe with Barbara(wife), doesn't give a damn, keeps boinking the guy, the marriage ends in divorce and Joe and Sandy live guilt-free in a remorseless sham of a relationship, and now wife(Barb) is left out to the coyotes in a horrible divorce. Would you honestly still be friends with Sandy? How could you possibly say yes?

No. With friends like that, who needs enemies? I really believe she is done, or trying to be done with him now. But he still keeps trying. After he told her he was married he said " I still have feelings for you" then why in FK did you get married?? omg he really does piss me off

Jill I don't think anybody thought you were lying. We just got a little confused. Thats a tough call.

Is it really over between Sandy and Joe? Or is Sandy just telling you it is? Is she being too accomodating to Joe, by answering his calls, texts, and e-mails? If she's hearing from him at all and not threatening to cut his balls off if he doesn't leave her alone, then it's not really over between those two.

Ideally, I wish they would both throw the guy to the curb! He doesn't deserve even one second of their time. BUT, thats my opinion and I'm not married to him, nor do I have any emotion for him, well other than anger and disgust... Whether "barb" wants to fix her marriage or not is up to her. But I feel she needs all of the information to make that decision. But I also feel it's not really my place since I don't even know Barb. So that's where I'm torn.

That is a pickle. To be honest. It's going to play out wether you say anything or not. I also hate to see somebody taken advantage of......