This thread always seems to have a couple belly-aches per week about the
site "sukcing" or "I'm leaving" etc. While part of me says "tough
noogies - get lost", another part of me agrees with the common sentiment
about this site.

Here's what YOU and ME can do to make this site better:

1. If someone emails you, have the courtesy to say "no thanks", or "not
interested", or "your profile doesnt interest me in the slightest". No
reply is plain rude. If the email is at least polite, and looks like the
guy actually read your profile, have enough class to reply. Reply
accordingly - if your 25 and he is 40, say so "...you are too old", or
whatever is appropriate.

2. DONT send sexually charged emails. Please. This isnt grade school.
Sending un-wanted crap kills the site. No woman wants to see your
"massive wand of love". Have some class. You appear very childish if you
can talk trash only to strangers, and only through a keyboard. C'mon,
get a life.

3. If someone is emailing trash, or absolutely nasty for no reason, and
wont stop, then post it to one of the treads. Expose them for being an
azzhole. [I realize the JSH rules generally forbid this, but anyone who
is harassing another member is ruining the board - and should be exposed
for it]

4. Have some faith. If you see a profile, or a post, that seems
interesting, or reflects something appealing to you, then email that
person. directly. Go ahead, reply to that person. Give some trust - open
up a little, reach out and trade ideas with someone. Trust isn't ours to
keep, it only exists when given between two ppl.


Thats my ideas. What's yours?
-Mike

thanks for bringing some sense to this place

If you break the rules, you can get suspended also.
Best answer, being harrassed; report & let the bosses handle.

Being polite should not be so hard. I have been in some discussions
which were harsh. Some people need to respect threads! You do not agree,
post your own thread!Be polite!Had the invader post later and did not
reply due to his right to post!I think its called respect. What do you
think?

Come on I like the complainers they just make everything so darn fun and
happy........NOT

Thanks for posting this Mike

well where do I begin.

some of the vets here (those that have over 5k posts) have called me an
asshole and child molester because I didnt agree with them.


On the post of giving honor to the soldiers on Memorial Day I disagreed,
and was accussed of having sex with my own children, which I rasied by
myself, and a few of these vets just had a field day about it.....very
disgusting.

I was also suspended because I asked Alpine Rocks to please reframe from
continuing his anal threads when he actually told women how to "deal
with it."





so, im not sure you can fix this problem....but then again, its just my
problem isnt it?

1) i owe it to no one to respond. i do not have enough time in my day
to answer every email i receive, and it's silly to think that i have ANY
obligation to do so. i respond when i can and to my friends.

2) if i choose to exchange sexual emails with someone, then i will. it
is mine and their business, and nobody else's.

3) i do not believe in posting personal emails, ever, unless the person
who wrote it is all okay with it. kind of defeats the "personal" part
if it's made public.

4) i like this...but at the same time, i often only have time to respond
in thread.

in summation, one can be respectful without being obligated.

well said lulu!!!!!

very true mike thanks

Good thread!!

now if we could kill the tons of Retarded trash threads we would be
good..









& I'll stop sending porn..




No for real I had tried to send a joke to a couple of the guys
I talk to all the time in the threads, because I hadn't noted with them
it didnt go thru..

Sorry bear, I did not suggest that myself,that was rotten of folks. I
stood for the thread you invaded. Yes, you are more than welcome to your
opinion.Won't agree or try to change your mind. It was how you did it I
had a problem.

those are very good ideas. but the thing is , how may peopel will
actually keep those ideas in mind. and actually follow them?

There is hope.

Mike -- What I find fascinating are the ones who post about "This Site
Sucks" three days after signing up, and who have never posted anything
other than the "This Site Sucks" complaint.

What do they think is supposed to happen? Vast hordes of people are
sitting, patiently waiting for a new profile to show up, so they can all
simultaneously jump lustfully on the new person? Does this happen on
any other site? (If it does, somebody please tell me, I really need to
take a look at that.)

You're absolutely right about the e-mail thing. There are some
unconscionably rude and inconsiderate people here (luckily for most of
you, they all seem to be in Illinois) who refuse to reply to even the
most pleasant and/or complimentary message. People like these do give
the site a bad reputation, but I think it's important that we, as a
community, inform complainers that this is not a universal condition.

And sexually-themed introductory e-mails make everyone (and the site as
a whole) look bad, as if this is somehow "acceptable" or "standard
procedure." There are going to be idiots on every site (some have more
than others, obviously), but I think we need to make the newcomers
realize, again, that this group of infantile morons is a small and
unfortunate percentage of JSH membership.

As for your Number 4, I generally never e-mail anyone first (realizing
that there are a lot of women on dating sites who are leery about this
because of previous bad experiences with unsolicited e-mails), and,
having been ignored by the few locals I have attempted to e-mail, I will
not even bother with that in the future. I actually do get lots of
e-mails here (albeit primarily from people in Canada and far away
states), so I have no reason to even attempt to talk to any of the local
people anymore. If someone wants to comment on something I wrote in the
forums, they are perfectly welcome to write to me; I respond to
everybody, as I believe that is the only proper and civil way to handle
these things.

Getting back to the forum issue, it occurs to me that maybe we should
have something that lets newcomers know how important it is that, if
they want to be noticed, they use the forums to put themselves "out
there." Seems like too many have given up on the site without even
realizing the role that the forums play.

good thread Mike !!!

Generally I have no complain about this site, it is doing great, I would
be complaining about those scam who keep jerking around, I got one a few
weeks ago, and reported him to Mike, now he stops bashing me.

This is a free site and yet we should be thankful for we all enjoy its
services. There is one thing that would help everyone from getting into
the point of complaining: IGNORE people who we think are just playing
around, what would we lose if we do so?

lex....is volume 2 and 3 in the works?

#3 is definitely not permitted and could result in your posting
privileges being suspended. Making accusations about someone is against
the forum rules. Remember, there's always two sides to every story.

That having been said, this is a good post. On #2, how often would you
say you get these kinds of sexually charged emails? Is it 10% of the
time? or 90% of the time?

Thanks Mike for starting this discussion. We're always open to ideas on
how to improve the site.

Bear -- Yeah, and completely annotated and footnoted, if the publisher
will go for it.

With a little luck, it'll be a movie next summer....

hmmmm, tightening like what? letting the admin edit every word we type,
on email and on the threads?

<<<--- just confused