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| Topic: Motowndowntown made me do it!!!!! | |
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ok..you want a good one, here ya go. I'll never get a date after this, but hey..like I have offers anyway. About a year or so ago I was sick..laying on the couch in my nightie, drinking tea, sweating out a fever. And I had a touch of the squirts.. so I got up to go to the bathroom..felt a fart coming and let it rip...ended up being a chit and not a fart. Chit running down my legs, my kids cracked up watching me waddle to the bathroom to shower. I told them to shut the hell up..I use to wipe chit off them when they were babies! You're right. You're never gonna get a date after that one. |
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ok..you want a good one, here ya go. I'll never get a date after this, but hey..like I have offers anyway. About a year or so ago I was sick..laying on the couch in my nightie, drinking tea, sweating out a fever. And I had a touch of the squirts.. so I got up to go to the bathroom..felt a fart coming and let it rip...ended up being a chit and not a fart. Chit running down my legs, my kids cracked up watching me waddle to the bathroom to shower. I told them to shut the hell up..I use to wipe chit off them when they were babies! dude... i had a friend who thought it was funny to fart in public until once he pushed too hard and ROOSTER TAILED up the back of his pants!!! omg i still laugh at that chit! |
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Oh no
Oh god no Women like me don't fart!!!!!! 
   
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ok..you want a good one, here ya go. I'll never get a date after this, but hey..like I have offers anyway. About a year or so ago I was sick..laying on the couch in my nightie, drinking tea, sweating out a fever. And I had a touch of the squirts.. so I got up to go to the bathroom..felt a fart coming and let it rip...ended up being a chit and not a fart. Chit running down my legs, my kids cracked up watching me waddle to the bathroom to shower. I told them to shut the hell up..I use to wipe chit off them when they were babies! WHY DID I READ THAT!! 
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ok..you want a good one, here ya go. I'll never get a date after this, but hey..like I have offers anyway. About a year or so ago I was sick..laying on the couch in my nightie, drinking tea, sweating out a fever. And I had a touch of the squirts.. so I got up to go to the bathroom..felt a fart coming and let it rip...ended up being a chit and not a fart. Chit running down my legs, my kids cracked up watching me waddle to the bathroom to shower. I told them to shut the hell up..I use to wipe chit off them when they were babies!
Ladylid you have got to overcome your shyness... 
I have the same problem...so damn shy...
maybe we could start a support group for shy people? 
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Did you know you can actully lite them on fire??
Had this friend who used to do it all the time... 
till he burned the hell out of his azz, lighting up his levis!!!! 
True Story!! "Sad but true"-Metallica |
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ok..you want a good one, here ya go. I'll never get a date after this, but hey..like I have offers anyway. About a year or so ago I was sick..laying on the couch in my nightie, drinking tea, sweating out a fever. And I had a touch of the squirts.. so I got up to go to the bathroom..felt a fart coming and let it rip...ended up being a chit and not a fart. Chit running down my legs, my kids cracked up watching me waddle to the bathroom to shower. I told them to shut the hell up..I use to wipe chit off them when they were babies!
Ladylid you have got to overcome your shyness...
I have the same problem...so damn shy...
maybe we could start a support group for shy people?
Yeah..this shyness has been quite a hindrance for me....
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ok..you want a good one, here ya go. I'll never get a date after this, but hey..like I have offers anyway. About a year or so ago I was sick..laying on the couch in my nightie, drinking tea, sweating out a fever. And I had a touch of the squirts.. so I got up to go to the bathroom..felt a fart coming and let it rip...ended up being a chit and not a fart. Chit running down my legs, my kids cracked up watching me waddle to the bathroom to shower. I told them to shut the hell up..I use to wipe chit off them when they were babies! You're right. You're never gonna get a date after that one. oh right..c'mon. You have never been sick and had this happen????? Really... |
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its okay ladylid..
everyone's pooped themselves at least once. one day we'll be sittin around drinkin wine and i'll tell you the constipation from hell story. you'll never take percocet again :p |
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ok..you want a good one, here ya go. I'll never get a date after this, but hey..like I have offers anyway. About a year or so ago I was sick..laying on the couch in my nightie, drinking tea, sweating out a fever. And I had a touch of the squirts.. so I got up to go to the bathroom..felt a fart coming and let it rip...ended up being a chit and not a fart. Chit running down my legs, my kids cracked up watching me waddle to the bathroom to shower. I told them to shut the hell up..I use to wipe chit off them when they were babies! dude... i had a friend who thought it was funny to fart in public until once he pushed too hard and ROOSTER TAILED up the back of his pants!!! omg i still laugh at that chit!
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ok..you want a good one, here ya go. I'll never get a date after this, but hey..like I have offers anyway. About a year or so ago I was sick..laying on the couch in my nightie, drinking tea, sweating out a fever. And I had a touch of the squirts.. so I got up to go to the bathroom..felt a fart coming and let it rip...ended up being a chit and not a fart. Chit running down my legs, my kids cracked up watching me waddle to the bathroom to shower. I told them to shut the hell up..I use to wipe chit off them when they were babies!
Ladylid you have got to overcome your shyness...
I have the same problem...so damn shy...
maybe we could start a support group for shy people?
And hold meetings in the bathroom?. |
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ok..you want a good one, here ya go. I'll never get a date after this, but hey..like I have offers anyway. About a year or so ago I was sick..laying on the couch in my nightie, drinking tea, sweating out a fever. And I had a touch of the squirts.. so I got up to go to the bathroom..felt a fart coming and let it rip...ended up being a chit and not a fart. Chit running down my legs, my kids cracked up watching me waddle to the bathroom to shower. I told them to shut the hell up..I use to wipe chit off them when they were babies! You're right. You're never gonna get a date after that one. oh right..c'mon. You have never been sick and had this happen????? Really... Yes I have. But I wasn't wearing a nightie and was no where near a shower. |
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ok..you want a good one, here ya go. I'll never get a date after this, but hey..like I have offers anyway. About a year or so ago I was sick..laying on the couch in my nightie, drinking tea, sweating out a fever. And I had a touch of the squirts.. so I got up to go to the bathroom..felt a fart coming and let it rip...ended up being a chit and not a fart. Chit running down my legs, my kids cracked up watching me waddle to the bathroom to shower. I told them to shut the hell up..I use to wipe chit off them when they were babies! You're right. You're never gonna get a date after that one. oh right..c'mon. You have never been sick and had this happen????? Really... Yes I have. But I wasn't wearing a nightie and was no where near a shower. The effect is sooo much better in a nightie..nothing to stop it from running down your legs.. oh no..now I have a visual of you in my nightie.. 
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ok..you want a good one, here ya go. I'll never get a date after this, but hey..like I have offers anyway. About a year or so ago I was sick..laying on the couch in my nightie, drinking tea, sweating out a fever. And I had a touch of the squirts.. so I got up to go to the bathroom..felt a fart coming and let it rip...ended up being a chit and not a fart. Chit running down my legs, my kids cracked up watching me waddle to the bathroom to shower. I told them to shut the hell up..I use to wipe chit off them when they were babies! You're right. You're never gonna get a date after that one. oh right..c'mon. You have never been sick and had this happen????? Really... Yes I have. But I wasn't wearing a nightie and was no where near a shower. The effect is sooo much better in a nightie..nothing to stop it from running down your legs.. oh no..now I have a visual of you in my nightie..
Don't say that I haven't shaved my legs today. |
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ok..you want a good one, here ya go. I'll never get a date after this, but hey..like I have offers anyway. About a year or so ago I was sick..laying on the couch in my nightie, drinking tea, sweating out a fever. And I had a touch of the squirts.. so I got up to go to the bathroom..felt a fart coming and let it rip...ended up being a chit and not a fart. Chit running down my legs, my kids cracked up watching me waddle to the bathroom to shower. I told them to shut the hell up..I use to wipe chit off them when they were babies! You're right. You're never gonna get a date after that one. oh right..c'mon. You have never been sick and had this happen????? Really... Yes I have. But I wasn't wearing a nightie and was no where near a shower. The effect is sooo much better in a nightie..nothing to stop it from running down your legs.. oh no..now I have a visual of you in my nightie..
Don't say that I haven't shaved my legs today.
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Edited by
luv2roknroll
on
Thu 10/29/09 06:04 PM
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Hell I got you all beat...
Im doing Chemo, so I dont know what the hell is going to happen. 
Lets just break this down now!!!
Will I go? Wont I go? Can I go? Do I really give a ratts azz, if I go? Each pill and treatment comes with a free surprise inside. 
Its like Russian Roulette. 
Needless to say, some days im sporting nothing, somedays im sporting a mini pad, and some days I think I just need to shut the f up, stop being vain, and go get me some depends!!!! Now thats honesty and damn azz funny! |
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its okay ladylid.. everyone's pooped themselves at least once. one day we'll be sittin around drinkin wine and i'll tell you the constipation from hell story. you'll never take percocet again :p Yep--had that after an operation on my hand. Bad dreams and golf ball turds. Love that percocet!!! |
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its okay ladylid.. everyone's pooped themselves at least once. one day we'll be sittin around drinkin wine and i'll tell you the constipation from hell story. you'll never take percocet again :p Yep--had that after an operation on my hand. Bad dreams and golf ball turds. Love that percocet!!! Try morphine, you won't poop right for a month. |
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Hell I got you all beat...
Im doing Chemo, so I dont know what the hell is going to happen.
Lets just break this down now!!!
Will I go, wont I go, can I go, do I really give a ratts azz, if I go. Each pill and treatment comes with a free surprise inside.
Its like Russian Roulette.
Needless to say, some days im sporting nothing, somedays im sporting a mini pad, and some days I think I just need to shut the f up, stop being vain, and go get me some depends!!!! Now thats honesty and damn azz funny! Yep--hope the chemo is working out---my daughter is doing that same thing---Seems to be working for her. Hope it works for you. And she lets em go when she feels like it!
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omg i wanna cry knowing that i'm not the only one who went through that!!! damn walgreens didnt tell me to take a stool softener with it! so for a week straight i was totally drugged up and eating nothing but apple sauce and rice (tonsiles removed!)
I thought i was gonna die. if child birth is anything like that i never want kids. *cries as she feels welcome to the bad poo club* |
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