Love that one........

Do as you will..but harm no one

Common sense is very uncommon

Look with your eyes, not your ***hole (Dad's favourite)

God don't like ugly.....

Life's a b1tch and then ya marry one

we will cross that bridge when we come to it.

Life's a beach there is no escape from it
Life's a b-i-t-c-h and then you die (one dies) before I am accused

The famous words of Norbert Slidingbottom

Has been known to happen..

Confucius say...he who walk through turnstiles sideways is going to Bangkok.

Never confuse a brown crayon for a tootsie roll.










Love that one, it's a quote from a seven year old.

honesty is the best policy, but insanity is the best defense

dont sh.!t where you eat at

dont know why but sure it affects the taste

Live and let live

I have a few that are more common sense things to do, and not sayings to pass along.

When camping, hang your shoes or boots upside down, so critters won't find a home.

Never enter a drinking game for speed. The other guy has probably won most of them, and is looking to laugh at you when you puke.

Always wear a shirt and (at least) shorts when cooking on the oven.

When someone says "Watch this", get your phone ready to dial 911.

The biggest guy in the bar/club isn't trying to make a name for himself. It's usually one of the shorter guys.

if you don't know what it is

kill it

Never trust a man who, when left alone in a room with a tea cosy, doesn't try it on.

gotta love a man in a tea cozy...

It's not failure, just redefined objectives.

Just because you can, doesn't mean you should.