This is all coming from a 43 year old man looking for a "girl." And we parents are supposed to take our advice from him....

I was and am a fantastical, exceptional, wonderful, fantabulous parent!!

I made every mistake in the book with my children...and they still turned out great!!

thanks for asking!!

Being a good parent is about communication, setting and enforcing FIRM and CONSISTENT guidelines to behaviors, helping to develop their ethical code, and being there as a resource and a problem solver.


I am not necessarily against corporal punishment. It is probably useful for those who cannot get their message across via other means. In other words, if your communication and problem solving skills are somewhat lacking then ONE smack across the butt is a possible answer.

Conventional wisdom says one smack across the butt is for the sake of the child. Any more than one is the parent venting anger and frustration.

What advice did I give?

The one from the bible?

Many people are 'insulated' from the real world.

Here we go!
What does he mean? Where does he get off saying that?!

Many say all the right things , but don't practice it themselves.

We all have a view of how things should be.

Take racism for example.

In public, we will all agree that we are not a racist!!
But yet many 'conveniently' structure their life to avoid certain people.
i.e.
You have a good job and a make good money....why didn't you buy/move into a house in a area known locally as 'ghetto'?
...or....I don't want my child in that kind of environment!!
(the hypocrisy is glowing on fire!)
What kind of environment are you to say is the correct one?
...or even better...what's so wrong with the people who live in a ghetto?
Ohhh...I see....you're better than them!
(but can't/won't EVER admit to that!)


Again....many say all the right things , but don't practice it themselves.


...and it's super easy to type all the 'right' answers on an internet board so that others will all silently shake their heads in agreement and mumble...wow....he a such a good person!

Talk to us when you speak from experience. Till then keep chasing after "girls."

My 1st wife had a child and I helped raise him for 5 years.
Probably not good enough for you.......and the others on here with kids from broken marriages.

or even better....good job avoiding my post!

RIGHT!
Only the best schools for my kid!
Screw everybody else!

You read my posts and get an attitude......wow...you ARE deep!

teehee! *giggles*....keep chasing girls!! hehe!!!

What depth!

Sorry, not the same thing. You'll excuse me if I chuckle a bit. You'd probably like it if I avoided your post. This way you can say whatever you like without having anyone to refute you. Not going to happen. You post in a public forum and you are going to hear from people who disagree with you. Deal with it or not, doesn't matter a whit to me.

and yet you just HAD to take the time to type THAT response anyway!
yea....don't bother TRYING to hold an intelligent conversation....that would go against the laziness we all hold so dear.


Off to the bank since they have to close tomorrow for a NON-holiday....so I won't be back for a while.

You're damn right I get an attitude. You have drawn the short straw as far as neighbors. Sorry about that. However, when I read the post about being a good parent from a 43 year old man, looking for a girl, that has no children, yes it IRRITATED me!


AND MADE ME LAUGH AT THE SAME TIME!!!

Which would precisely be why I haven't posted here. Mitch, you can adopt ME! Or Deb! I'm can behave!

Of course I will....


And I know you would never speak to an issue that you cannot answer with practical knowledge. You're much too smart and self-aware for that.

Thanks!.....Dad

Research has showed that spanking your children is less effective than other forms of discipline. Negative punishment is more effective than positive punishment. Negative punishment means that you are removing something from the environment. Example, so you child decides to throw their food instead of eating it. You remove the food or deny dessert. Positive punishment is when you add something to the environment (generally adverse) such as spanking. Child are more effectively punished by negative punishment or reward systems. Granted, spanking many be effective in some situations, however in the long run it is not effective.

For more information... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Punishment_(psychology)

Which is pretty much what I was saying. Spanking is useful for those that do not have better and more effective ways of establishing and enforcing behavioral parameters.

I firmly believe the most important part of the process is consistency in enforcement. Of course, as a parent you need to be flexible in any given situation, but arbitrary enforcement of discipline sends mixed signals.

Sorry, I'm back. But I just had to speak to this. If you are a Bible quoting kind of guy, and you seem to be by the spare the rod spoil the child, then surely you would also know that We, man, were put above all other "animals" wayyyy back in the Garden of Eden. We were given dominion over them. But I'm sure you knew this already.

Apparently RealityMan's "reality" has left him a tad bitter at the world. I feel bad for him. Sadly, it has jaundiced his outlook.

My daughter is 11... and I know where she is at ALL times.
There isn't one thing on the list you mentioned that would ever, EVER occur to me as being OK. My daughter isn't always the best behaved kid around, but she's a good kid. And yes, I think I'm a good mom.

I didn't get to have kids. But, I admit to being one of those people who have said, after seeing a misbehaved kid, "MY kid would never do that!" and mean it at the time. BUT, I know I haven't had to walk that walk, day in and day out, 24/7/365 days. It is The most difficult and the most rewarding job on the planet. So easy for me to say what I would or would not have allowed. I never, unfortunately, had my bluff called.

well said