If you really do not trust him or believe his stories, why don't you just lay it all on the table to him directly, instead of playing a spy game and going undercover on myspace? To go through all of that kind of sneakiness, just seems kind of juvenile. You should be approaching him like a mature adult in a relationship, not playing games and messing with his family in the process.

how is it you don't know for sure? Haven't you ever been to where he lives? Does he make excuses for not wanting to see you at times?? I mean how can you not know? In a way it is a good and a bad thing to do on myspace, but it is a way to get answers, but then you will have huge issues on your hands girl!! to tell or not to tell the wife. and then if you do she will probably blame you(easier to do than for her to blame him...which is stupid, but the way it usually works!!) but at the same time she may be partly right, because you have almost been stalking her on myspace and lying about who you really were!! crappy spot to be in chicka-good luck to you!

I think the point here is "Are they Separated" OR "Does he say they're Separated"?

Here's a clue, If your time spent with him is mostly in Bed, counting foreplay heading to Bed: Then you just have to take another look at the relationship ask yourself "Are you in a Relationship or are you a Booty Call"?

Oh yeah, I forgot to wrap that up....

If you end up realizing that you're in a Booty Call situation and you're NOT happy with it: Just end it! No explanation needed, just don't answer his calls...

If he's making up a big story about being separated (and he's not) and saying that there is some kind of relationship (that really isn't there after you look at it Plus he's been lying through his teeth just to keep jumping into Bed with you then I say "Flame ON" and Flame his A$$! Personally I wouldn't worry too much about his Wife & Family because they deserve to know where they stand as well

The guy told you he was seperated and you were dumb enough to buy that baloney for six months without being shown any paperwork? Most states it is $125 to file a legal seperation to prevent any additional co-debts and set up child support?

IMHO you have no right to be stalking his WIFE. Personally I can't help hope she catches on to you and stomps both his and your behinds. If for some reason she gets cyber abuse tacked on you could loose your phone and or your freedom.

What is more likely is she knows exactly what he is doing and is besting him at his own game. She is talking to you and pumping you to tell her lawyer. He just might sue you for contributeing to the allenation of their affections. If something happens to this woman you have painted a real big bulls eye on your chest.

In case you have never heard of it there is such a thing as a revenge fu-- where partners purposefully get with someone to catch something and give it to their philandering mates. Since lovely things like Hep C Hiv/Aids are life threatening it is eveil

I totally agree. This behavior is gamey and manipulative. If you want to find out if he is separated, go online to the local
Family/Domestic Relations court website and LOOK IT UP.
Leave this woman alone. You are playing her, supposedly being her friend? That is cruel.
Does she deserve that? Is that how you'd want to be treated?

Golden Rule... come on.

beware, the mingle frontier. Anything can happen online. Nothing wrong with checking people out.

I guess the question is he really separated or not? Does he live in a separate household from his wife? Has he already filed for divorce? Has he ever spent a whole night with you? I get the feeling from what you said that you are not sure he is telling you the truth, thus the charade on your part. Since you are not sure you can trust him by talking with him I see why the Myspace attempt on your part. However, it does appear to make you look sneaky. Still people are known to hire private investigators too. I do agree you need to protect yourself, I'm just not sure of the best way to approach it.

ok so your lying and being deceitful to find out if someone else is lying and being deceitful.wouldn't it be easier to just leave the guy..

It seems like you're putting an awful lot of work into confirming what you already know inside. Why not just accept that he's not who you think he is and move on? Revenge really doesn't bring happiness.

I agree with what so many people have said here. The wife knows, believe me. Just leave them both alone and if you REALLY want to be involved with someone who may or may not be separated from his wife, then tell him to contact you after the divorce is over. If he's all that, you can wait on him for awhile. I understand the need to try to get information, but it'll bite you in the end. Wash your hands of it so you can feel pride in your own actions.

i have to agree with this..

heres my issue... you have lied to the woman to use her for info...if in fact u think he still has something going on with her then its your own fault for continuing to mess around with a guy you think is taken... married or not married if he is taken and you feel he is, doesnt paint a pretty picture about yourself..puts you in the very same catergory as he is<if true>

however you didnt seem to think he was in a relationship in the begining..im sure you are angry at him...and you would have every right to be..but your anger should be at him.... not his wife who has nothing to do with this..why lash at her?

The MySpace page is a little over the top, and when you look for drama you usally find it. But if you go about it the wrong way then you just taken away your opportunity to have the upper hand. Remember If his stories aren't adding up, he will bust himself. HOWEVER....., If he is married and you find out inform his wife and back away from the situation.

Well for starters I wouldn't be dating someone without seeing the legal papers.


If it waddles like a duck, quacks like a duck chances are its a duck.


This is disgusting IMO and it shows that if this guy is a cheating scubag you both are on the same playing field.


This actually blows my mind, you have been dating 6 months and you don't know if you can trust him or not. Damn... why not that says something about you.


So if he is lying instead of confronting him you are going to confront her. Why in God's name would you do that unless deep down you are hoping that if he is still in a marriage with this woman, he will leave her for you.



I started hearing this line when I started dating way back as a teenager. This is the same one pretty much as I will pull out before I do.. Yeah right...


IMO you are so wrong to do this to a woman that has done nothing to you. Stop and think for one minute how you would feel.


This means absolutely nothing in my book, they are seperated and supposedly getting divorce doesn't mean they hate each other. Also they have children together.

I have to also say if a guy I was dating did something like to me, His butt would be so to the curb and there would be no second chances.

Bottom line you don't date unless you see the legal papers.