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| Topic: HELP..he asked me again... | |
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Edited by
yve726
on
Sat 01/03/09 08:58 AM
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So yesterday i posted a new topic here about how I am nervous about meeting this guy i've been talking on the phone with because I feel like he'd be disappointed by how i look and stuff...plus, honestly, i've NEVER met anyone online...i'm just really scared of the awkwardness...
Last night we were on the phone for like 2 hrs and he brought up the "when can we hang out" question again...I said "when we both have time?" and then he suggested that we meet up sunday, which is tomorrow...I couldn't say yes and I told him I'll think about it and get back to him today..I don't know wat to do...not sure if I'm ready..part of me just wants to meet him and get over it...but part of me is telling myself to never get in touch with him again so I wouldn't need to face this scary moment.... Although we've been talking on the phone a lot, it's not like we've been flirting or anything..when we talk on the phone we talk just like normal friends...so I don't even know why I should be nervous but i really am... I don't know wat to do..... |
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If your gut instinct is telling you not to do it then don't... Always go with your first instinct I say....
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why would you worry about how you look....looks good to me
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I'm not sure why you feel he would be disappointed by how you look. I'm not gay or anything like that, but l looked at your profile and your a cute girl. Face your fears and go for it. Have a great time! If for some reason it don't feel right, don't see him anymore.
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So yesterday i posted a new topic here about how I am nervous about meeting this guy i've been talking on the phone with because I feel like he'd be disappointed by how i look and stuff...plus, honestly, i've NEVER met anyone online...i'm just really scared of the awkwardness... Last night we were on the phone for like 2 hrs and he brought up the "when can we hang out" question again...I said "when we both have time?" and then he suggested that we meet up sunday, which is tomorrow...I couldn't say yes and I told him I'll think about it and get back to him today..I don't know wat to do...not sure if I'm ready..part of me just wants to meet him and get over it...but part of me is telling myself to never get in touch with him again so I wouldn't need to face this scary moment.... Although we've been talking on the phone a lot, it's not like we've been flirting or anything..when we talk on the phone we talk just like normal friends...so I don't even know why I should be nervous but i really am... I don't know wat to do..... First of you are a beautiful woman so you can quit worrying about that. If you really aren't ready to meet tell him that and if he can't accept it then he isn't worth having. I would say go somewhere for coffee this way it is short and sweet. If it's too awkward it will be over quickly and you can go on with life. Relax and do what feels right. |
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I think you are just having first time jitters. Meet at a public place for just a short meeting. No pressure. Maybe a coffee shop or ice cream even. If he isn't happy with how you look, then he is stupid. Good Luck!!
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its perfectly normal to get nervous about meeting someone online expecially if you have never done it before
granted its not always a bad experiance.. if you deep down want to meet the guy , say yes but meet in a public place like a coffee shop or diner, somewhere with lots of ppl , if need be ask a friend to meet you at the same place and sit somewhere nearby just in case something doesnt feel right. you may end up meeting him and thinkin to yourself what on earth was i so nervous about but you will never know unless you do it good luck and be safe |
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OOOOHHHHH Please!! Stop whining about it and just do it OR end it.
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I'm not sure why you feel he would be disappointed by how you look. I'm not gay or anything like that, but l looked at your profile and your a cute girl. Face your fears and go for it. Have a great time! If for some reason it don't feel right, don't see him anymore.  absolutely,.. as long as you#re safe ,..you have nothing to loose & everything to gain !!! NOTHING like facing your fears !!!!! you feel reborn ! |
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Just make sure if you do see him, that it be in a very safe and very public place.
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Public place for sure.
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So yesterday i posted a new topic here about how I am nervous about meeting this guy i've been talking on the phone with because I feel like he'd be disappointed by how i look and stuff...plus, honestly, i've NEVER met anyone online...i'm just really scared of the awkwardness... Last night we were on the phone for like 2 hrs and he brought up the "when can we hang out" question again...I said "when we both have time?" and then he suggested that we meet up sunday, which is tomorrow...I couldn't say yes and I told him I'll think about it and get back to him today..I don't know wat to do...not sure if I'm ready..part of me just wants to meet him and get over it...but part of me is telling myself to never get in touch with him again so I wouldn't need to face this scary moment.... Although we've been talking on the phone a lot, it's not like we've been flirting or anything..when we talk on the phone we talk just like normal friends...so I don't even know why I should be nervous but i really am... I don't know wat to do..... OMG, Yve, you are BEAUTIFUL!!!!! Why would that thought ever enter your mind? I have spoke to several guys here on the phone for hours and even for a couple months at a time....I told them I would let them know when I was ready to meet them! If they don't have the patience to wait until your ready then they are not worth it! You have to be as excited as they are to meet them. If your first instinct is to wait than always go with your gut! No reason to hurry anything. Just explain to him that you want some more time to talk with him and that when you feel the time is right, you will set a date to meet...it's that easy! If you are feeling pressured you need to tell him that too!! Hey, Welcome and good luck to ya! |
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make sure that you feel safe when you set up time to meet him...have a friend call you at a designated time...and make sure that friend has the contact info that you do re: him...i will often tell the men i am meeting that i have someone calling who has all the same info that i do...NEVER get in a vehicle or go to a private meeting place...stay in public...if you hit it off there will be plenty of time down the road for all of that...do some research on online dating...just google it...if he is a gentleman he will wait until you feel comfortable...good luck! let us know if you do meet him! heck..post it right here (all the contact info) if it makes you feel safer!
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I'm not sure why you feel he would be disappointed by how you look. I'm not gay or anything like that, but l looked at your profile and your a cute girl. Face your fears and go for it. Have a great time! If for some reason it don't feel right, don't see him anymore. I guess it's just that I have very little confidence in myself..especially after putting on some weight in college...perhaps I will just have to face this and get over my fears, like everyone else also suggested |
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So yesterday i posted a new topic here about how I am nervous about meeting this guy i've been talking on the phone with because I feel like he'd be disappointed by how i look and stuff...plus, honestly, i've NEVER met anyone online...i'm just really scared of the awkwardness... Last night we were on the phone for like 2 hrs and he brought up the "when can we hang out" question again...I said "when we both have time?" and then he suggested that we meet up sunday, which is tomorrow...I couldn't say yes and I told him I'll think about it and get back to him today..I don't know wat to do...not sure if I'm ready..part of me just wants to meet him and get over it...but part of me is telling myself to never get in touch with him again so I wouldn't need to face this scary moment.... I don't know wat to do..... Well don't lead him on if you aren't willing to meet,that's just mean. If you do decide to meet, make sure someone knows where you are going, his screen name, his phone # & be very careful about getting a in car. If you do decide to get in his car, call a friend with the tag number. I prefer driving my own car. I have met a few guys online, & my girlfriends & I had this buddy system for safty. I tell the guy I am doing this, none of them have disagreed so far. If the guy is decent, he'll see that it's smart & not be upset. I have found that most guys are nervous too. Ok all the safety stuff being said, try to relax & have fun. Remember he's got as much time energy & emotion invested in it as you do, if he's agreed to the safty rules chances are he's sincere. Good Luck & have fun!. Oh & don't worry about you're looks! For Pete's sake, you're cute as hell! |
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well, meet in public and get it over with already...then you'll know if there's chemistry...and whether or not there's something there....let us know how it goes..
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If your gut instinct is telling you not to do it then don't... Always go with your first instinct I say.... But it doesn't sound like a gut instinct that she shouldn't meet him. This sounds much more like a self sabatoging (sp) doubt. If I don't meet him I won't get rejected. If I reject him first, he won't reject me. If I stop things how, I won't get hurt. But you will never ever meet a person or find what you are looking for if you give in to that kind of thought pattern. Sure it's scary. But I think you should take the chance and actually meet him. |
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yes meeting in public is the best way, whether it be a restaurant or even a town mall, this way there are numerous people around and he cannot reject you.... i know that fear i have it too, i get extremely shy and tend to clam up and not talk... but just be yourself and i see why there will not be any problems...
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Thanks for all your advices..I think I'll just meet up with him tomorrow..and I will surely tell u guys how it went..(OMG I'm REALLY nervous)
And as far as the safety issue....I feel that he's a pretty sincere person...when I told him I don't know if i'm ready to meet him he said "ok" and didn't pressure me at all..it was just that I felt bad so i told him I'll think about it... He even told me that I can bring a friend, or my brother (LOL) if i'm worried... So to me it sounds like he's a genuine person and I never felt creeped out by him |
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I think its a good idea to bring someone close to you. You'll feel less nervous and more at ease. They can also tell you what they think...you can all yell at me now....
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