Glenn you don't have to apoligize for being offended.

I was offended also.

I just chose not to take it any further cause whats the point.

She did not mean to offend.

Course just as in sexual harrassement I don't think it is up to the
offender to say wether or not it was offensive but the offendee.

I could see your having taken offense if the term was a derogatory one
in most people's eyes. It is not. I don't know of ANYONE I've ever
encountered in my life (aside from a on the Internet, including you two)
who used the term "redneck" as a term of endearment.

What's more, it doesn't make any SENSE that you'd be offended by my
saying I hated rednecks, because why in the name of god would someone
say they hated people who were, in your eyes, good people?

Surely you've heard the term used before to mean people who get into
fights and any logical person would have reasonably inferred that that's
how I meant the term when I said what I said.

Had I said, "I hate n******," and then tried to feign innocence as to
its generally known use, that'd be a whole 'nother story altogether.

And if for some unfathomable reason he couldn't understand that the word
obviously meant something offensive to me, after he stated he took
offense, I explained what the word meant to me and he should have said,
"Oh, okay, i see what you mean."

If someone says, "I'm proud to be a redneck," I think one of two things:

"This makes no sense, because who would ever be proud to call themselves
a 'redneck?'"

or

"The term must mean something differently to him than it does to me."

Not exactly rocket science.

But if it'll make you feel better, next time I say, "I hate rednecks,"
I'll be sure to use the disclaimer:


"I don't mean I hate good people; I mean I hate bad people."

Isn't there a female country singer who proudly proclaims she's a
redneck girl.

My being offended lasted long enough for me to post my Is a redneck
answer.

Then I considered the source and felt better cause I know you would not
delibrately offend anyone.

Can we just leave this rest and play.

Yeah, I believe there is. But a country song/singer certainly does not
define the meaning of a word.

She defines what it means to her. Which I believe was your point.

It means what it means to me, because it means the same thing to pretty
much everyone around here. The term has never been used here as a
compliment.

Probably the only time I've ever heard anyone state otherwise would be
along the lines of "Yeah, I'm a redneck! And proud of it, too! So what?
You wanna fight about it? Huh? Huh? Come on, man, you and me, outside.
I'll fight ya with both hands tied behind my back." Yadayadayada...

jeanc>

This is not an insult.

I reckon you are a bit of a redneck (my version) yourself.

Once you form an opinion on something God himself couldn't change it.

I could see you at the gates of heaven tellin St. Peter to step aside
cause you needed to bend gods ear.

Just curious about the original post, what would be considered soft?
I'm 27 so I can't really comment on how people acted 25 years ago,
lol.

AB, now you're just making up definitions to suit your mood! LOL..

I've never heard the term "redneck" defined that way.

I guess, in my understanding of the term, then, I could call a murderer
a "redneck."

In reply to the original posted question, I think you need to look at
how society has educated people to act, the age of the person your
dealing with & the "social class" they were raised in.

Example: I an 56, raised in a middle class family, envolved in the
transportation field most of life. This exposed me to a more aggressive
type of people. Not a lot of deep thinkers in my adult examples. Both
parents just had high school education, raised in the depression, for
what ever reason broken homes, didn't really know what a family life was
& grew up during & involved in WW II, saw some horrendous things.

Example: Male 32, raised w/all the modern aspects of life. Education
stressed, some college, reasonably stable home.
Computer trained, medical education. Raise w/totally different thoughts
about the positions of men & women.

I think there is a huge difference.
The younger person was raised to think more & be more open in dealing
with feelings. Thus could be considered soffter?

Excellent analogy, OS. We're raising a soft society altogether, not just
men. We have machines and to do all the work for us, for the most part.

i'm from the south, and renecks simply mean simple country folk. i'm
line dancin, johnny cash listenin, sweet tea drinkin redneck and folks
seem to like me just fine.

I'm right in the buckle of the Bible Belt and have lived here for nearly
37 years and it's never meant that. Not where I'm from, anyway. The term
redneck was always used to define someone who, to break it down in
simple terms, is a "troublemaker."

Ah, but I notice, too, that you're only 28. These days certain terms
seem to take on a new meaning. For instance, there was a time when the
word "nigger" was never a good thing. And, in my estimation, it never
was and it never will be. EVER.

But some people say it jokingly and it doesn't seem to have the quite
the negative connotation it used to.

I'd never call someone a "nigger" because, the way *I* learned its
definition, it was simply used as a derogatory term for Black people.
And that's just wrong.

But there is not a "race" of people called "Rednecks." There is not a
defined geographical location of "Rednecks."

I have yet to see anyone say, "The Jewish people live over here, the
Hispanics live here, the Caucasians live here and the Blacks live here,
and over there in ___ town? That's where the Rednecks live!"

I live in Alabama Jean, and we use the term as kind of an endearing
joke. Like Larry the cable guy, or Jeff Foxworthy. The thing is, most of
us country folk don't care what you call us, so if you call us rednecks,
it must be a good thing. To me the term just means country people who
are proud of their roots. The definition that you give for rednecks is
what we call white trash.

Back to the OP, a truly strong man is not afraid to show his soft side.
Macho posturing is still around, and still not a good thing. Some girls
like it, the operative word being "girl." Truly strong women like truly
strong men.

The meaning of the term is a matter of demographics, obviously.

Hey Big G....it's apparent that little miss jeanc here has her own
interpetations on words...what they mean,and how to use them. As do you.
It's not worth getting heated up over.

newguy,
I'm over it. I've also learned quite a bit.

Isn't everything a matter of PERSONAL interpertation/opinion/reaction to
what life throws at us.
Could it be, we get to involved in pushing our .../.../..., rather than
accepting eachothers post as just what they are.
Each persons PERSONAL ../../..
Seems things get heated for minor reasons to me.
Just my thoughts.

I think it has taken a long time for men to realize they don't have to
be macho. 25 years ago things were a lot harsher in life in general.
And those men were raised by fathers who had it even tougher. I like
the idea of a strong, brave, man, who really doesn't have to prove
himself. I don't think it's soft, I think it's sexy.

Oh, and just for the record, being a redneck in Lower Alabama is a good
thing. We call men who beat their wives, and start trouble, criminals.