Seeking advice about it hints that it isn't "working". From my perspective, I don't do the whole religious part of marriage, but it is in my opinion one of the most important commitments. I do know from numerous psych case studies this arrangement adversely effects the mental/emotional development of a child and not to sound like I'm bashing, not taking your child's best interests in your choices show's a great deal of immaturity. All my thoughts, though my core being is about personal freedoms, this makes me a sad panda.

I just looked to see where you're from. There's a group near there, that believes as you do and dressed up the term to "polyamorous". They use to go on-line and try to recruit people to join their group. You're right, in that unless someone has been there, one doesn't truly know, but if you've been or are being recruited by these people, my advice to you is be very careful in who you're dealing with and protect your child!

you honestly shouldn't have to defend yourself, you recent post as you said was to anyone who shared the same views as you. Not to be pushed under the bus. I'm not condoning it either, but to each their own. Their are still multiple tribes of people all over the world that have more than one significant other...and there was a time when concubines were considered the norm. However, in modern day society the norm is for one man, one woman in a committed relationship to each other. But i will say one other thing, you say it is for your child, that's cool but i'd DEFINITLY say set some boundaries, because if you don't your child will be confused, such as the previous boundaries I had mentioned(like not bringing your 'other' home) but that's just my recommendation. I mean, it seems that no one is going to change your mind, and that you have made it up....but at the same time you posted about it..so you can't be entirely comfortable with the idea...unless you are, but you want another person on the side as well so you are posting to see who would be willing to date a person in an open marriage....just my observations

Dude...you simply stumbled onto the wrong site for this....you might find some that are into this sort of thing...but most here want a loving relationship with one....and having such a time at finding that....hard to be happy for someone who is trying to capture more than most here simply desire to have. So many want the one to go home to, to hold and cherish...you have that and are simply throwing it away....won't have many fans here...sorry.

It won't work.

But you are not actually "committed" to each other. She is apparently in a sexual relationship with someone other than you. In this life there are always times where temptation rolls right in front of you and you have to be able to say "NO".

No, you are right. We can only know what we feel we'd do.

But remember, you brought it up.

No I am not being recruited by anyone. We have set up rules to go by. Neither of us bring anyone around our child and we put family obligations before any other. I was looking for other people in this type of relationship to talk with because it is almost impossible to talk with most people because they are so closed minded about things all they want to do is condemn you. Which is what Im getting here. I do not have a problem with people who dont share my views. I do have a problem with people who can not look at all views though.

That's what she said

Then you have come to the wrong place. I am sure there are sites that cater to this sort of thing, but not here...most of us believe that love is very sacred between two people and when shared....it is no longer love...I am so glad T is not here to see this, he would be heart broken

marriage is a sacred institution between a man and a woman. Till death do us part. Marriage should be forever and last till death

at least that was what I believed for my first three marriages

Well, what you are suggesting is outrageous to most people. It is playing with fire. If you want sympathy, go to an alternate lifestyle blog or message board. Really, it is akin to you going into a Christian site and saying, "Where are all the Jewish ladies at? I've got a Christian and I'm looking for a Jew...."

Seriously.

You are in the wrong place. People keep telling you, but you're listening to that real well too.

Actually I posted this for those that may be here that are in an open marriage. It wasnt to solicit opinions from those who are not.

Read, why don't you.

And it is obvious that is just doesn't exist here...sorry 'bout ya...but you really should find a site where it is more the norm...I am not saying you must leave the site, because all are welcome, I'm just saying that what you are seeking will NOT be found here. And BTW, if you did not want ADVICE...maybe you should have picked a forum other than RELATIONSHIP ADVICE

There might be someone on here, i mean there is at least one already. My ex-wife might be willing...maybe i should post her number

I mean afterall she was in an open Marriage for 6months while i was on deployment....I was just unaware of it at that time

where are all the jewish women at-blazing christains...great movie.

so since this is a "polyamorous" thing you ar LOOKING for another to love along with your wife? after all, she already as a friend she has growing feelings for

polyamorous, swinging, i`m so confused