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| Topic: Would you..... | |
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 I'm taking my ball & going home  Run and tell your mommy!
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Ya know, I know I have these very issues that your talking about, bashing or whatever, but try looking at it from the other side..... I have been working on these issues for years, and your right nothing anyone says or does can change how a person thinks or feels about themselves. I was working on my issues and was doing very well with them, Untill I found out I was being lied to for Three years. I'm not going to get into the details of what happened because thats not important. However, when you look around and see that no one wants to be around you unless your writing a check for something, getting them out of trouble or fixing one of their issues, you start to slide back in to the thought pattern that your really not worth anything. At that point you start to figure that its the way you look or act. Thats when you start to with draw from people, convence your self that its better for everyone else if your just not around to screw things up for them, and eventaully you just give up. There is only so many times that you can hear that you never were good enough to date, They just wanted something from you. At that point you start to believe everyone is like that. Thats when you start to hate People as a whole. Personally I'm trying to stop things before they get to that point, but every time I start to make some ground, and start to feel better about my self and my self worth, something happens that proves to me that I shouldn't have started to believe that I was a decent person after all, and that no one will ever want to be with someone like me, or a type of person like myself. So while your sitting here talking about people and the fact that they don't think highly about themselves, try to understand why. I'm glad you posted. Of course nobody should be treated that way. I'm very sorry that this happened to you. I do agree it can demeaning when people say such things to you and can spiral a person downward real quick. There has to be a point though, where you realize that it's THEIR issue, not yours. My advice hun.........for what it's worth. Stop writing checks and getting them out of stuff. Use YOUR money to take some lovely lady out on a date and prove to her you ARE worthy. Believe me, you'll get something back in return. Even if it's a good friend, it's sure worth more than the creeps that are using you. |
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I'm taking my ball & going home Run and tell your mommy! I want my legos back too 
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Oh, and just to clarify........I am the queen of self sabotage. I know what's it is like to have low self esteem. I lived it for many years. That demon is finally almost off my back and I'll be damned if someone is gonna put it back.
Get mad if you feel that way. Take your dignity back!!! |
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Right on Sista!!
I'm not there yet, but working on it!! |
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Right on Sista!! I'm not there yet, but working on it!! 
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closed minded people simply need a wake up call.
whether it be from a humbling experience or an enlightening perspective. i have hope in everyone out there. its never too late to make a change. |
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I want my legos back too Indian giver! |
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I can't say if I would enter a relationship or not I might enter a friendship with them. I also would really want to know and try to understand why they feel that way. I also believe that you have to learn to love thyself before someone else can.
I think we all have hit rock bottom at different times in our lives we all have a choice on what we do when it happens. I have had some hellish whammy's in my life that made want to curl up and hide from the world and I did for a time but yanno you have to come back and fight. I think when I got ovarian cancer and I wasn't supposed to make it with chemo and radiation I made a choice then I have only one time around on this earth it is up to me what I do with it. I choose to live each day as my last and with no regrets. I make amends when I hurt someone, I laugh at myself and I forgive myself for screwing up daily. I also love myself as I know I am doing the best I can in this world daily. So therefore I expect the same out of others. |
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Ya know, I know I have these very issues that your talking about, bashing or whatever, but try looking at it from the other side..... I have been working on these issues for years, and your right nothing anyone says or does can change how a person thinks or feels about themselves. I was working on my issues and was doing very well with them, Untill I found out I was being lied to for Three years. I'm not going to get into the details of what happened because thats not important. However, when you look around and see that no one wants to be around you unless your writing a check for something, getting them out of trouble or fixing one of their issues, you start to slide back in to the thought pattern that your really not worth anything. At that point you start to figure that its the way you look or act. Thats when you start to with draw from people, convence your self that its better for everyone else if your just not around to screw things up for them, and eventaully you just give up. There is only so many times that you can hear that you never were good enough to date, They just wanted something from you. At that point you start to believe everyone is like that. Thats when you start to hate People as a whole. Personally I'm trying to stop things before they get to that point, but every time I start to make some ground, and start to feel better about my self and my self worth, something happens that proves to me that I shouldn't have started to believe that I was a decent person after all, and that no one will ever want to be with someone like me, or a type of person like myself. So while your sitting here talking about people and the fact that they don't think highly about themselves, try to understand why. I'm glad you posted. Of course nobody should be treated that way. I'm very sorry that this happened to you. I do agree it can demeaning when people say such things to you and can spiral a person downward real quick. There has to be a point though, where you realize that it's THEIR issue, not yours. My advice hun.........for what it's worth. Stop writing checks and getting them out of stuff. Use YOUR money to take some lovely lady out on a date and prove to her you ARE worthy. Believe me, you'll get something back in return. Even if it's a good friend, it's sure worth more than the creeps that are using you. Theres nothing for you to be sorry for. I did it to myself. I allowed it to happen. As for understanding that its their issue, it becomes hard to feel that way when you hear it so much and from so many people. You start to believe it to be true. If it wasn't they why is it always the same. The only answer I can seam to find it that there is something wrong with me, and all I'm good for is running my business and bailing everyone out of trouble. I can't help it but after awhile thats the only answer. And what I mean by awhile is damn near 15 years. After that long you can't help but to become jaded. |
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OH.. a man who pays his own bills.. what a change of pace! That alone should get you hooked up!
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I can't say if I would enter a relationship or not I might enter a friendship with them. I also would really want to know and try to understand why they feel that way. I also believe that you have to learn to love thyself before someone else can. I think we all have hit rock bottom at different times in our lives we all have a choice on what we do when it happens. I have had some hellish whammy's in my life that made want to curl up and hide from the world and I did for a time but yanno you have to come back and fight. I think when I got ovarian cancer and I wasn't supposed to make it with chemo and radiation I made a choice then I have only one time around on this earth it is up to me what I do with it. I choose to live each day as my last and with no regrets. I make amends when I hurt someone, I laugh at myself and I forgive myself for screwing up daily. I also love myself as I know I am doing the best I can in this world daily. So therefore I expect the same out of others. 
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OH.. a man who pays his own bills.. what a change of pace! That alone should get you hooked up! You would think so, but it seems that being 5'6" and 145lbs is a deal killer. I guess I'm sopposed to be tall, thick hair, musclar build, AND can pay my own bills. |
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No, not unless the guy excelled in many other areas. Those type people will just bring you down. There are enough negative people in the world already. I don't need to date one.
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You would think so, but it seems that being 5'6" and 145lbs is a deal killer. I guess I'm sopposed to be tall, thick hair, musclar build, AND can pay my own bills. Oh heck, I'm supposed to be 120# and have no gag reflex.  I'm not ever gonna be a barbie. Just work what ya got!!
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You would think so, but it seems that being 5'6" and 145lbs is a deal killer. I guess I'm sopposed to be tall, thick hair, musclar build, AND can pay my own bills. Oh heck, I'm supposed to be 120# and have no gag reflex. I'm not ever gonna be a barbie. Just work what ya got!! 
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there's enough negative crap in this world as is. Why add to it?
Lord know's I've had more then my share of stuff thrown at me over the years, but you know what? I will always keep a positve attitude. You just never know what tomarrow will bring you.....and you need to be ready 
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You would think so, but it seems that being 5'6" and 145lbs is a deal killer. I guess I'm sopposed to be tall, thick hair, musclar build, AND can pay my own bills. Oh heck, I'm supposed to be 120# and have no gag reflex. I'm not ever gonna be a barbie. Just work what ya got!! It's like you're in my head.. you're freaking me out!! LOL! |
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You would think so, but it seems that being 5'6" and 145lbs is a deal killer. I guess I'm sopposed to be tall, thick hair, musclar build, AND can pay my own bills. Oh heck, I'm supposed to be 120# and have no gag reflex. I'm not ever gonna be a barbie. Just work what ya got!!
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Oh heck, I'm supposed to be 120# and have no gag reflex. I'm not ever gonna be a barbie. Just work what ya got!! It's like you're in my head.. you're freaking me out!! LOL! Bwahahahahaha! Sisters from another mister maybe? (My dad would turn in his grave if he heard me say that!) Welcome to Mingle 2 btw. I like you already..... 
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