I've only been on this site a few days...

all of this is somewhat difficult for me (still), because 16 months ago the man I loved passed away from brain cancer. I have been alone since that time...

the 'moving on' process has been hard for many reasons....but many times I find myself wondering about the whole 'soulmate' 'true love' thing we all hear about...

It took me many years to meet the man I was with...we met in 1999 and were together since. We were not perfect, at all, but we didn't fight or have silly drama like most relationships do. Our friendship was strong and we truly wanted to bring out the best in each other.

People would often tell us that even if we were on complete opposite sides of the room, they could see the love we had for each other....and during his battle with cancer I couldn't leave his side at all...it wasn't possible to. I was holding him when he took his last breath.

He would say to me that he felt so lucky to have met me and shared the memories we shared...that many live their whole lives never really finding love....--he once told me he would have rather had the years with me and die of cancer then live to be an old man and never had me in his life.

Yea -- he was good...and we really loved each other...

So now here I am...it's like a part of my heart and soul left when he died....

is it really possible to believe something even close to that could happen in my life again? He wanted it to for me...but I'm just not sure it's really possible.

well -- this is long, and I'll be shocked if I get many responses....

You will be o.k. Pain will fade in time and you will find someone...Have fun in here..It will happen when you least expect it to

I read the whole thing.



I'd say you're lucky to have love and lost than to never have loved at all.

In my opinion it doesn't matter what happens from here on out, you have pulled a mission accomplished.

that's what they always say, I know... --just have to be so careful with respecting his memory and what we shared, not comparing others to him and what we had - which isn't easy...and especially never wanting to use anyone at all...it's hard.

I think it IS possible to find that kind of love again.

It will not be completely the same, but I think it will be close.

More than possible...just give it time, relax and make wonderful friends...and another best friend will happen into your life. I am so sorry for your loss, but at the same time, so happy that you had the experience of true love in your life...will be wonderful when you find it once again...good luck Sweety

i know you have to move on and all that but dont ever let his memory in your heart die because he was right some people never get to experience that kind of love sounds like a good guy and im sorry you had to go through that

Sure, it's possible -- if you're open to the possibility.

Nice write, by the way -- you express yourself very well.

The fact that you recognize those things....and realize how hard it will be to avoid doing them....will go a long way toward you finding that kind of love again.

I'm so sorry for your loss And I honestly think that a love like that only comes around once in a lifetime, but if you're really lucky, it does come around twice. You'll always have those memories to cherish, but once you meet the next man of your dreams, I'm sure you'll be making just as many great memories as well.

awwww...he would say that to me...about us and our life..."Mission accomplished" - he reminded me that we're always told by everyone our entire lives that all they really want for us is happiness...and that we had it, so, mission accomplished.

thanks for the reminder of that...

thank you so much...your words are very kind and mean a lot...

gby

My mother buried 2 husbands by age 40.
She married a third time. His third time married too.
Was it bliss? Were they soulmates?
Was she truely happy?
I can't answer that.
BUT
When her health tanked, he was there every step of the way. Some men would have cut and run.
I don't know if what they had was Love, but it was powerful.

Best wishes

He wanted you to love again. To prosper. To share, to care. To have the happiness and life all should have. Life is a collection of memories. Memories are time.

Kill the pain. In this modern age we have the wherewithall to knock that sucker called pain into submission. Then we evolve to realize we deserve to live again. Live! In the here and now to boot! You deserve it! Do what it takes to survive and thrive again! You can do it. Destiny and fate always open a door once one shuts. Look for it with your inner eye.

Im sure you'll find someone,

your very pretty,

My heart remembers what you are feeling and I hope you discover what I did which is that being loved and loving someone back never prevents you from loving someone else for the unique person they are in your life at another time. I use the anology of the love you feel for each of your family. One does not compete with the other but each are perfect in their own right. To repeat the ability to recieve true love is the greatest honor you can pay to someone for making it a joy to be loved. You have validated what they valued. Keep your standards high, but human, and your future will not take anything away from the past. Give your heart time to heal you are so new to your greif that it is still early to draw any final conclusions of how you will feel or what you want. (((Hugs)))

As time goes by, you just learn to accept and deal with the loss that made such a difference in your life. The inspiration seems to be less than expected of yourself, and, for me, thoughts of whether or not, you TRULY did all to make them feel loved, and appreciated!!! There have been half hearted attempts to move on, but you realize, the memories will carry you though! Love will blossom again, just as the seasons change! Even a tree, when cut down, shall blossom, again...