Yeah.... I would do it to the point of aggravating the crap out of them, then point out there flaws, even the ones that arent really there

man your a smart person! this is the best answer yet

Thank you

P.S. - You don't even know which Sox!

hes very very wise! im now 344 but sure wish i used my brain like hes doing when i was his age

Thats why I have a list in my profile.
If you fit that list- We don't have to CHANGE a thing!

True. Sorry I thought Boston Redsox before looking at your profile. My bad. It's still a good insight though. I don’t feel that people should just harp endlessly on things that are really out of your control and impossible to change, but certain issues can be addressed. Absolutely. Especially bad habits and things that could negatively affect the relationship for the long haul.

if we never atemt to change we will all be alone until we die or extremely unhappy,life is all about change afterall thats why were all here just a test and passing thru. and when were in a relationship hopefuly its always with a adult

It is the Red Sox, actually.

As for the topic...I think that relationships which foster change can be extremely productive. Situations where the person didn't realize that their actions were producing a negative effect are particularly progressive. Also, I think that the changes often wind up being extremely beneficial for the person that changes as well as the person who suggested the changes.

/Of course, this will wind up controverted and counter-productive in unhealthy relationships.

i can give my opions like anyone else! if you dont like my coments from an open forum and debate is what this site is, then quit posting

your very smart and wise

the word PERFECT has become distorted and meaningless here....

I can post what I want here..just like you can..You're the one getting all angry cuz I'm not saying "Yes sir" and going along with whatever you say..I'm not bothered by it.No one said you had to answer any of my posts.

i could careless if you agree or not and im not angry your the one who called names first. you called me a idiot, you started it but could careless

I never called you an idiot..I asked you if "stop being an idiot" is what I should say to the guys that try to change things about me..You jumped ME after I said that..so actually,you started it.

Sounds like a miscommunication. He thought you called him an idiot, so he defended himself. You thought he was overreacting since you didn't actually insult him, so you responded.

No harm, no foul.

Back to the topic...LadyOfMagic, I'm curious do you think that nothing should be changed about a person, by themselves, in a relationship, ever?

The only thing that should be changed in a relationship are the things that are physical harmful to someone..If you like to drunk and drive..yes your partner has the right to say something..if you like to get high and drive..yup they should speak up..but things like "Well I like red heads..will you dye your hair red for me?"..Or..I like tall girls..will you wear heels even if you yourself don't like them?..um..Nope..don't think so.

yes he is smart n wise. but he would be brilliant if he were a METS fan.!!!!!!!

Well those are both pretty extreme examples. The first two are very significant, the other two are absolutely trivial. What about something like the person's habits such as something sort of in the middle...like they don't think that cleaning the kitchen is necessary, even though it attracts roaches. Or their driving is really fast and their significant other asks them to be a bit more careful. Or they don't spend any time supporting their significant other's activities.

Would any of those be acceptable in your opinion?

Then they aren't Good enough for you.
There are lots of things I would love to change about my man, but he is who God made for me. All of us have faults, but if they REALLY wanted to be with you as one, they should accept you for who you are and your short comings.

whatever you think, i know different. you started it and you know it