I am sure all your friends know your kind heart and are very proud to
have known you (very nice )

That is very true in alot of lives even if we don't want to admit
it(very good)

Texsgal you are a very strong lady just to be able to write that down
god bless you

That is one beautiful piece of work

paints a very sad picture ,but it is good

Oh girl i know what you are talking about my grandaughters are driveing
me crazy today to wvery thing you said they have done thank god they are
in bed now ,but i wouldn't change a moment of being with them today
,heres a dozen for you for surviveing

Thank's Barney thats funny

Flowers = Garden

thank you glad to do it

That is so very Heart warming, can tell you have children the love
show's

This guy and his girlfriend are driving down a road, RREEEAALLLLLY
SSLLLOOWWLLLYYYY. The girl says that for every 5 miles an hour he goes,
shel’l take off a part of her clothes. So he goes 5 miles faster, her
shirt. 5 faster, her pants.Eventually she is naked and hes going 75 mph.
They then crash into a ditch. The guy is stuck and cant move. The girl
says she’ll go out for help. The guy tells her that he can reach his
shoe and that she can use it for a bit of "clothing". She puts it over
her vagina. She runs up to a trucker and says"Help, Please! My boyfiend
is stuck and he cant get out!" THe trucker replys,"If he’s in that
far....i’m afraid i can’t help you."

One Man Writes:
I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so
much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I've
never figured out why men think with their head and women with their
heart.

FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting
into bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't
feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to
hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman
enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to
my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not
what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on
several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one
to take so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to
compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit.
We went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of
diamond earrings. Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have
thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was
testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even
know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said,
"That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from
all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally
said, "I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't
feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled
WHAT?"

I then said "honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.
You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me
to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this
look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me
for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that *****
knows I'm smarter than her.

A husband and wife are having sex upstairs with the window open when a
bumblebee flies in the window and into the wife’s vagina. The man and
the woman freak out and decide to go to the emergency room. When they
finally get to see a doctor, he says that his plan is to put honey on
the tip of his penis, to start having sex with the woman, and then to
attract the bee and pull out his penis along with the bee. After a
minute the husband and wife agree to the plan. The doctor starts having
sex with the wife. At first the mood is still calm, but after a couple
of minutes the doctor starts groping the wife’s breasts. She starts
moaning and screaming along with the doctor. The husband yells, "Wait a
minute! What the hell do you think you are doing doctor?" and the doctor
replies, "change of plan buddy, I’m gonna drown this son of a *****"

Bill has been working his ass off lately.Becoming very stressed out,and
he has been seeing a phychiatrist the doctor told Bill to go to his
cabin in Alaska.Finally Bill couldn’t take it anymore.He called his
doctor ,and said he stressed out and fixing to jump out the window to
end it all.The doctor calmed him down while at the same time he made
Bill reservations on a flight to Alaska to the cabin.Bill said I cant go
what about my wife and my kids? The doctor told him not to worry I have
already taken care of that Bill just go.Bill went got on the plane and
made it to Alaska.He was in the town to get supplies when he saw a bar .
Bill went in looked around and hollered "Wheres all the women at"? The
bartender said "What women there ain’t no women around here"!Gimme a
beer said Bill.Sitting at the bar he asked "What do y’all do when you
want some"? Bartender replied"Oh we just go see ole Joe about that".Bill
said "I can’t do that"!Bill finished his beer,got his supplies and went
up to the cabin.He fished and hunted sang to himself.Running out of
supplies he went back down to town after a month stopped first at the
bar.He went in and Hollered"WHeres all the women at"?Bartender replied"I
told you already there ain’t no women around here we go and see ole
Joe"!Bill said gimme a beer then!Sitting at the bar Bill looked up to
the bartender and asked "Supposing I was ,but I’m not like that.Who all
would have to know"?
The bartender thought for a minute and said" 5! Well theres you and me
of course.Then there is the two other guys that have to hold ole Joe
down because ole Joe ain’t like that either!

3 truck drivers died and met St. Peters at the Pearly Gates.
There was a JB Hunt, a Wal Mart, and an ole bull hauler truck driver.
St. Peters said, "I’m going to ask you 2 questions, I want you to answer
them honestly."
He asked the JB Hunt and Wal Mart driver, "Have you ever cheated on your
log books?"
They replied, "No sir."
St. Peters asks, "You ever cheated on your wife?"
They replied, " No we sure have’nt."
St. Peters says, "You 2 go to door #1."
The ole bull hauler walks up there and St. Peters asks, "Have you ever
cheated on your log book?"
The ole bull hauler replies, "**** yes I have, drove from New York to
L.A. and never wrote down an hour either way."
St. Peters asks, "You ever cheated on your wife?"
The ole bull hauler replies, "Oh hell yes, there’s this ***** in New
Mexico that gives the best blow job in the world!"
St. Peters tells him, "You go to door #2."
The ole bull hauler strolls over and looks back at St. Peters, "Why am I
going to door #2 and those 2 assholes are going to door #1?"
St. Peters replies, "Cause those 2 are going to hell for lying and you
and I are going to New Mexico!"

there is a husbin and wife ,the live on a farm....and they are laying in
bed....the husbin rolls over and grabs the wife by the tits and says if
you could get milk out of these we could get rid of the cows..then he
grabs her by the ***** and says if you could get eggs out of this we
could get rid of the chickens ...then the wife grabs him by the **** and
says if you could get this up ...i could get rid of your brother....