Community > Posts By > DaronLe

 
DaronLe's photo
Sun 11/01/09 02:20 AM
No not really on this site for women...No problems to report on that front...Like the community board though. By the way I am a commercial pilot, so not insane, or so that is what they say on my annual health reviews. Who knows you might have been aboard my plane..Like I said before just a picture.

DaronLe's photo
Sun 11/01/09 01:56 AM
LOl not that old brother...flew f117 Nighthawks in Dessert Storm. And yes get paid a hell of a lot more doing this..You x-military?

DaronLe's photo
Sun 11/01/09 01:48 AM
Come on just a picture..don't read to much in to that. You don't dislike your favorite actors for holding a gun in their movies do you..Just for fun so don't read to much into it..Thanks for your reply.

DaronLe's photo
Sun 11/01/09 01:47 AM
DIARY OF A SNOW SHOVELER

December 8:
6:00 PM. It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by the window, watching the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven. It looked like a Grandma Moses Print. So romantic we felt like newlyweds again. I love snow!

December 9:
We woke to a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch of the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Can there be a more lovely place in the Whole World? Moving here was the best idea I've ever had. Shoveled for the first time in years and felt like a boy again. I did both our driveway and the sidewalks. This afternoon the snow plow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. What a perfect life!

December 12:
The sun has melted all our lovely snow. Such a disappointment. My neighbor tells me not to worry, we'll definitely have a white Christmas. No snow on Christmas would be awful! Bob says we'll have so much snow by the end of winter, that I'll never want to see snow again. I don't think that's possible. Bob is such a nice man. I'm glad he's our neighbor.

December 14:
Snow, lovely snow! 8" last night. The temperature dropped to *20. The cold makes everything sparkle so. The wind took my breath away, but I warmed up by shoveling the driveway and sidewalks. This is the life! The snowplow came back this afternoon and buried everything again. I didn't realize I would have to do quite this much shoveling, but I'll certainly get back in shape this way. I wish I wouldn't huff and puff so.

December 15:
20 inches forecast. Sold my van and bought a 4x4 Blazer. Bought snow tires for the wife's car and 2 extra shovels. Stocked the freezer. The wife wants a wood stove in case the electricity goes out. I think that's silly. We aren't in Alaska, after all.

December 16:
Ice storm this morning. Fell on my *** on the ice in the driveway putting down salt. Hurt like hell. The wife laughed for an hour, which I think was very cruel.

December 17:
Still way below freezing. Roads are too icy to go anywhere. Electricity was off for 5 hours. I had to pile the blankets on to stay warm. Nothing to do but stare at the wife and try not to irritate her. Guess I should've bought a wood stove, but won't admit it to her. God I hate it when she's right. I can't believe I'm freezing to death in my own living room.

December 20:
Electricity's back on, but had another 14" of the damn stuff last night. More shoveling. Took all day. freakin' snowplow came by twice. Tried to find a neighbor kid to shovel, but they said they're too busy playing hockey. I think they're lying. Called the only hardware store around to see about buying a snow blower and they're out. Might have another shipment in March. I think they're lying. Bob says I have to shovel or the city will have it done and bill me. I think he's lying.

December 22:
Bob was right about a white Christmas because 13 more inches of the white **** fell today, and it's so cold it probably won't melt till August. Took me 45 minutes to get all dressed up to go out to shovel and then I had to piss. By the time I got undressed, pissed and dressed again. I was too tired to shovel. Tried to hire Bob who has a plow on his truck for the rest of the winter; but he says he's too busy. I think the ******* is lying.

December 23:
Only 2" of snow today. And it warmed up to 0. The wife wanted me to decorate the front of the house this morning. What is she...nuts??? Why didn't she tell me to do that a month ago? She says she did but I think she's damn well lying.

December 24:
6". Snow packed so hard by snowplow, I broke the shovel. Thought I was having a heart attack. If I ever catch the son of a ***** who drives that snowplow, I'll drag him through the snow by his balls. I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling and then he comes down the street at a 100 miles an hour and throws snow all over where I've just been! Tonight the wife wanted me to sing Christmas carols with her and open our presents, but I was busy watching for the freakin' snowplow.

December 25:
Merry Christmas. 20 more inches of the @#$%^& slop tonight. Snowed in. The idea of shoveling makes my blood boil. God I hate the snow! Then the snowplow driver came by asking for a donation and I hit him over the head with my shovel. The wife says I have a bad attitude. I think she's an idiot. If I have to watch "It's a Wonderful Life" one more time, I'm going to kill her.

December 26:
Still snowed in. Why the hell did I ever move here? It was all HER idea. She's really getting on my nerves.

December 27:
Temperature dropped to -30 and the pipes froze.

December 28:
Warmed up to above-50. Still snowed in. THE ***** is driving me crazy!!!

December 29:
10 more inches. Bob says I have to shovel the roof or it could cave-in. That's the silliest thing I ever heard. How dumb does he think I am?

December 30:
Roof caved in. The snow plow driver is suing me for a million dollars for the bump on his head. The wife went home to her mother. 9" predicted.

December 31:
Set fire to what's left of the house. No more shoveling!

January 8:
I feel so good. I just love those little white pills they keep giving me. Why am I tied to the bed?



Comments:

DaronLe's photo
Sun 11/01/09 01:34 AM
8 years in the navy!!! Yea I blew up things. Hell to the yea!!!

DaronLe's photo
Sun 11/01/09 01:25 AM
No problem thanks for your observation but I am not a cattle rancher nor farmer..I am a commercial pilot, but I do live out in the country...take care and thanks for the reply.

DaronLe's photo
Sun 11/01/09 01:22 AM
Thank you for your honesty...I have good teeth but just don't smile a lot I guess..but I will put one on my profile with me smiling that is a good point..I also have a ball-fade haircut but do have hair..but another good point...most important thank you for the advice about my daughters.

DaronLe's photo
Sun 11/01/09 01:18 AM
Thank you for your honesty I will work on it.

DaronLe's photo
Sun 11/01/09 01:05 AM
Cool than thank you for the comment..I did fight in MMA for 6 years so I guess that should count for something...Also very nice with the whole wolf thing..The wolf is my favorite animal...no close seconds and have it on my layout on my space..Good Job

DaronLe's photo
Sun 11/01/09 01:01 AM
Is this a good thing?

DaronLe's photo
Sun 11/01/09 12:55 AM
Rate my pictures and profile and tell me what you think...

DaronLe's photo
Sun 08/02/09 11:50 PM
Dam, don't tell my Mom. She is and English teacher and would be pissed.....vain vain vain vain vain vain vain vain vain...Got it...Thanks...Daron

DaronLe's photo
Sun 08/02/09 11:48 PM
A ventriloquist cowboy walked into town and saw a rancher sitting on his porch with his dog:
Cowboy: "Hey, cool dog. Mind if I speak to him?"
Rancher: "This dog don`t talk!"
Cowboy: "Hey dog, how`s it going?"
Dog: "Doin alright"
Rancher: (Extreme look of shock)
Cowboy: "Is this your owner? (pointing at rancher)"
Dog: "Yep."
Cowboy: "How`s he treat you?"
Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food, and takes me to the lake once a week to play."
Rancher: (Look of disbelief)
Cowboy: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"
Rancher: "Horses don`t talk!"
Cowboy: "Hey horse, how`s it goin?"
Horse: "Cool."
Rancher: (an even wilder look of shock)
Cowboy: "Is this your owner?" (pointing at rancher)
Horse: "Yep."
Cowboy: "How`s he treat you?"
Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often, and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements."
Rancher: (total look of amazement)
Cowboy: "Mind if I talk to your SHEEP?"
Rancher: (stuttering, and hardly able to talk) ...... "Th-Th-Them sheep ain`t nothin but liars!!!"

DaronLe's photo
Sun 08/02/09 11:45 PM
Dear Child,

I am writing this slow because I know that you can't read fast.

We don't live where we did when you left home.

Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home so we moved.

I won't be able to send you the address, as the last family that lived here took the house numbers when they left so that they wouldn't have to change their address.

This place is real nice. It even has a washing machine. I'm not sure if it works too well though.

Last week I put a load in, pulled the chain, and haven't seen them since.

The weather isn't too bad here., it only rained twice last week, The first time it rained for three days and the second time for four days. The coat you wanted me to send you, your Uncle Steve said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets. We got another bill from the funeral home.

They said if we don't make the last payment on Grandma's grave, up she comes. John locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were worried because it took him two hours to get me and Shelby out.

Your sister had a baby this morning but I haven't found out what it is yet, so I don't know if you're an aunt or an uncle. If the baby is a girl, your sister is going to name it after me, she's going to call it Mom.

Uncle Pete fell in a whiskey vat last week. Some man tried to pull him out but he fought them off and drowned. We had him cremated and he burned for three days.

Three of your friends went off a bridge in a pick-up truck. Ralph was driving. He rolled down the window and swam to safety. Your two friends were in the back. They drowned because they couldn't get the tailgate down.

There isn't much more news at this time. Nothing much has happened.

PS, I was going to send you some money but the envelope was already sealed.

DaronLe's photo
Sun 08/02/09 11:31 PM
Good suggestion...I will work on that. Thank you for your honesty...Daron.

DaronLe's photo
Sun 08/02/09 11:30 PM
Thank you for your reply...Just checking.
Have a great morning...Daron

DaronLe's photo
Sun 08/02/09 11:29 PM
Not at you silly....at the camera.

DaronLe's photo
Sun 08/02/09 11:24 PM
If you could rate my profile I would greatly appreciate it.:smile:

DaronLe's photo
Fri 12/19/08 09:25 PM
Sorry guys and gals but I do have just one more question to ponder on. This is a good one for all you Walt Disney buffs. Why is Pluto always the dog on all fours while Goofy is the dog that is always standing upright? I mean come on if your name is Goofy Should you really be standing up anyway.

DaronLe's photo
Fri 12/19/08 07:11 PM
What knucklehead came up with the term building. My question is why do they call buildings buildings when they have already been built?

My last question for the night is why is there 10 hot dogs per package and some genius from a bread company has not created a solution by adding 2 more dam buns?