A lot of ways to sum up the totality of life in short sentences. Some
true, some inspiring and some are funny. Will copy-paste the forum for
my own library of thoughts on life and so forth. Thank you for sharing!

It was written by an 8-year-old named Danny Dutton, who lives in Chula
Vista, CA. He wrote it for his third grade homework assignment, to
"explain God." I wonder if any of us could have done as well? [ .... and
he had such an assignment, in California, and someone published it, I
guess miracles do happen ! ... ]


EXPLANATION OF GOD:
"One of God's main jobs is making people. He makes them to replace the
ones that die, so there will be enough people to take care of things on
earth. He doesn't make grownups, just babies. I think because they are
smaller and easier to make. That way he doesn't have to take up his
valuable time teaching them to talk and walk. He can just leave that to
mothers and fathers."

"God's second most important job is listening to prayers. An awful lot
of this goes on, since some people, like preachers and things, pray at
times beside bedtime. God doesn't have time to listen to the radio or TV
because of this. Because he hears everything, there must be a terrible
lot of noise in his ears, unless he has thought of a way to turn it
off."

"God sees everything and hears everything and is everywhere which keeps
Him pretty busy. So you shouldn't go wasting his time by going over your
mom and dad's head asking for something they said you couldn't have."

"Atheists are people who don't believe in God. I don't think there are
any in Chula Vista. At least there aren't any who come to our church."

"Jesus is God's Son. He used to do all the hard work, like walking on
water and performing miracles and trying to teach the people who didn't
want to learn about God. They finally got tired of him preaching to them
and they crucified him But he was good and kind, like his father, and he
told his father that they didn't know what they were doing and to
forgive them and God said O.K."

"His dad (God) appreciated everything that he had done and all his hard
work on earth so he told him he didn't have to go out on the road
anymore. He could stay in heaven. So he did. And now he helps his dad
out by listening to prayers and seeing things which are important for
God to take care of and which ones he can take care of himself without
having to bother God. Like a secretary, only more important."

"You can pray anytime you want and they are sure to help you because
they got it worked out so one of them is on duty all the time."

"You should always go to church on Sunday because it makes God happy,
and if there's anybody you want to make happy, it's God!

Don't skip church to do something you think will be more fun like going
to the beach. This is wrong. And besides the sun doesn't come out at the
beach until noon anyway."

"If you don't believe in God, besides being an atheist, you will be very
lonely, because your parents can't go everywhere with you, like to camp,
but God can. It is good to know He's around you when you're scared, in
the dark or when you can't swim and you get thrown into real deep water
by big kids."

"But...you shouldn't just always think of what God can do for you. I
figure God put me here and he can take me back anytime he pleases.

And...that's why I believe in God."

I guess I've been away too long; missed out on some things....
Well, IAM4U, the very best to you and your lady friend.

Now why is the grass always greener on the other side of the hill? Why
are we so non-comformist?
Lighten up, be optimist.... things happen for a reason, and we must act
open what we want... or it may get away.

After we had been married 25 years, I took a look at my wife one day and
said, "Honey...., 25 years ago, we had a cheap apartment, a cheap car,
slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10 inch black and white TV, but I got
to sleep every night with a really hot 25 year old brunette. Now we
have a nice house, a really nice car, a big bed and a huge plasma screen
TV, but I'm sleeping with a tired 50 year old woman. It seems to me
that you are not holding up your side of things." My wife is a very
reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 25 year old
blonde, and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a
cheap apartment, driving a cheap car, and sleeping on a sofa bed.
Aren't older women great? they really know how to solve your mid-life
crises...and quickly too!

http://howtoprankatelemarketer.ytmnd.com/

January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.

February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print
labels.....Helllloooo!!!.....bottles won't fit in printer !!!

March - Got really excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6
months.....box said "2-4 years!"

April - Trapped on escalator for hours ..... power went out!!!

May - Tried to make Kool-Aid.....wrong
instructions....8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!

June - Tried to go water skiing.....couldn't find a
lake with a slope.

July - Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....learned later, the
other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!

August - Got locked out of my car in rain storm.....car swamped because
soft-top was open.

September - The capital of California is "C".....isn't it???

October - Hate M & M's.....they are so hard to peel.

November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days instructions said 1 hour per
pound and I weigh 108!!

December - Couldn't call 911 ..... "duh".....there's no "eleven" button
on the stupid phone!!!

What a year!!

Before I was a Mum I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a
lullaby.

I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.

I never thought about immunisation.

Before I was a Mum - I had never been puked on.

Pooped on.

Chewed on.

Peed on.

I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts.

I slept all night.

Before I was a Mum I never held down a screaming child so doctors could
do tests.

Or give shots.

I never looked into teary eyes and cried.

I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.

I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mum I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't
want to put it down.

I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop
the hurt.

I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much..

I never knew that I could love someone so much.

I never knew I would love being a Mum.

Before I was a Mum - I didn't know the feeling of having my heart
outside my body.

I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.

I didn't know that bond between a mother and her child.

I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important
and happy.

Before I was a Mum - I had never gotten up in the middle of the night
every

10 minutes to make sure all was okay.

I had never known the warmth, The joy, The love, The heartache, The
wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mum.

I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much before I was a Mum.

And before I was a Grandma, I didn't know that all those "Mum" feelings
more than doubled when you see that little bundle being held by "your
baby"...

And remember that behind every successful mother... Is a basket of dirty
laundry.

Just something someone sent me, and I wanted to say thank you to the
Moms everywhere!

It's almost 12 noon here and you folk are NOW heading out to work!

Have to cook Lunch or I don't eat. Be back later.....

Gee, 7th heaven... isn't that wonderful?

Looks like I broke up the Ladies Morning Meeting!

Try some coffee... or your gonna get me yawnnnning!

Buenos dias, beautiful ladies. Seems like a ladies meeting, my I join?

Well, going to have to do some house clening today - evne if it's
against the doctor's orders!

So, hasta el luego......

MAC, it's wonderful that you have found love, and I think Lion is a
great fellow.... just wish that all works out for both and I'm happy for
the two of you!

Hands CCP her cup.

Buenas, Poeta! This is the coffee shop - whay's your poison?

Zero, you lost me - two years younger?

Morena, find something to do, if the boss catches you. There are
programs that monitor computer activity..... do not take it lightly.

I'm fine. Recuperating from surgery, but fine.

Sun is out and weather is a mild 80 degrees.

Buenos dias, Mac. How is the family?