or anywhere for that matter....but i do have a harem if anyones interested

they aired it but it was closed captioned 'cause they were all SBDs

I think that only happens three days a month

and all these years my mother was telling me I was a eunich

touche........ hear, hear....good show ol' chap!!!!!!!!!

Why don't little girls fart??........They don't get an *sshole til they get married

Ah yep,ah yep,ah yep....... sher do.ah ye p

That's the difference between dating and marriage

if a man is in the woods and speaks, and there isn't a woman around to here him, is he still wrong???????????

I don't even need that, low cut blouse on a girl shootin' pool works for me!

Two robins sitting in a tree looking at all the worms on the ground after a summer storm. "Lets fly down there and enjoy some dinner", says one.
They flew down and after eating way too many worms, robin #1 says,"I can't move because of all that I've eaten. The sun is coming out so why don't we enjoy the rays for a while and fly back up after a little rest?" Robin #2 readily agreed.
Meanwhile, two cats were lurking in the weeds nearby and one jumped out, pounced on the unsuspecting birds and gobbled them up. As he was laying there cleaning himself and feeling self satisfied, the second cat walked out and said: "Wow! yhat was so great, you moved so fast. I bet you really enjoyed that!"
To which he replied, "Yeah, I just love baskin' robins!

the dwarf..he sucker punched me

There I was on my way to work...getting into a fight was the farthest thing from my mind...wasn't even on the horizon...I was in a great mood...and then...I rear ended a car.

So there we are along side the road and slowly the driver gets out of the car...(and you knoww how you just-get-soooo-stressed and life stuff seems to get funny)?

Yeah, well I could NOT believe it... he was a DWARF!!!!!!
He storms over to my car and looks up at me and says, "I AM NOT HAPPY"!

So I look down at him and say, "Well, which one are you then?"

...and that's when the fight started

See how to start a fight II, pushed the button by mistake

A fellow had been having headaches for over twenty years. He had tried different doctors and many remedies to no avail. Finally he found a specialist that could help.
He told the man, I have good news and bad news. The good news is that I have found the problem, your testicles are pressing against the base of your spine and this is what is causing the headaces. The bad news is that the only way to stop the pain is to amputate your testicles.
Needless to say, the man was dumbfounded and requested time to think about it. After much contemplation, he decided to have the operation as he could not live with the pain anymore.
The operation was a success, but the man was in a deep depression over his lost manhood, so he decided to do something nice for himself by buying a brand new suit, hoping it would help cheer him up.
He walked in to the tailor's and made his request for a new suit. The tailor looks him upand down and says: "44 long jacket, 16 1/2- 34 shirt". The man was amazed as these were his sizes and everything fit. The tailor explained that he had been in the business so long that he could easily tell just by looking.
After making his choices, the tailor commented that he had a new suit, shirt, socks, and tie and that maybe he should buy some new underpants to cap it all off. He eyes him again and says "you need a 36 waist". No, no, no, says the man, you're finally wrong, I wear 34s. To which the tailor replied, "no way you wear 34s. If you do, they hold your testicles against your spine and you get really bad headaches...........