hey bonny, one is not enough for my boldness

Thanks Kim

some sins are good to repeat them, an excellent write wiz
Well if it isn’t
Goodbye
My unwelcome friend
Arriving once again
Empty handed
On my doorstep
For another quick visit
Leaving me
Raw
Bloodied
Thunderstruck
As you walk away
Bloated
Fulfilled
Placated
Satiated
Arms weighted
With pieces of me

What a familiar
Face you wear
Seems like you’re
Always there
Standing at my door
Your insincere smile
The greedy anticipation
Of accompanying yet
Another unwilling
Participant
On your journey
To parts cold
And unknown …

Look at you
You useless bastard
Nothing but a
Glorified ferry master
All prettied up
Sneaking through
My door
Huddled like the
Coward you are
In the belly
Of my love
So Trojan Horse clever
Your sneak attack
And pillaging of my
Heart and soul
Quick and brutal

I can’t count the times
The cruel goodbyes
I’ve said
A slide montage
Projected
Through my head
Depicting
Photo Shop clear
Those I’ve held
Near and dear
Moved on
Long gone
A trip taken with you
Ending
In no return

I’ve let go
Of so many I know
Carrying trip vouchers
I would gladly have
Canceled
Revoked
A moratorium
Invoked
Your invitations
Unheeded
Unneeded
And removed
From the itinerary
Had I only known
That the airline
They had flown
With you held
Nothing
But a one way ticket

And this time
You’ve gone all out
Planning what’s
Meant to be
The big finale
The grand tour
The soup de jour
The Mother …
… Of all farewells …

Well **** off
Go to hell
This is one trip
You’re taking
On your own
I won’t be left
Alone again
With nothing
But the sound
Of farewell
Adieu
Hasta la vista
Ringing in my ears
Blood red tears
Lava hot
Burning fissures
Down a face
Distorted by
Pained
Disbelief
Bewildering
Questioning
…Questioning…
……Questioning...

Why
I’m forced
To say Goodbye
When all I want
To say is …

… Hello …


awh oct 27, 2008

Behind the veil, there is a beautiful crime too
Sharing another one from the vault

Behind The Veil

A veil hides my face from scrutiny
Yet leaves exposed the best of me
My eyes, the window to my soul
bares witness as my strength unfolds
No fabric is strong enough
to hold captive the spirit within

Behind the veil dwells assurance
keeping intact my imminent avaunce
I plot and scheme my strategy
attending to detail with great alacrity
before taking bold steps forward

Behind this veil I made my sanctuary
I take control of what's best for me
Fine tuning my inner self
and deep into my consciousness delve
My appearance is only part of the tale
I am happy to live behind my veil

13.03.08

profound and touchy
The burn out of a shattered mind
Is just one's personality
But the fear and shame it brings
Is gut wrenching reality

You don't see the pain
Or torture that it brings
Deafening through my soul
Total agony rings

I live in fear of life
Yet somehow I keep going
My death will one day come
Since life is never slowing

I wake each morning
Holding my breath
I'm still alive and scared
But again I've out walked death

What will this day bring
Will this be the end
Could this be the final one
Will He His messenger send

no he won't touch you
Don't
Touch Me
Demon
I break easily in the lonesome night
October coldness
Leaves
Me Brittle
Love
Out in the darkness far away
Drinking with Companionship
No comfort for me
Only Blackness
Not even rain

A bony finger presses
pointedly
the Doorbell
at the
Center of my chest
instead of ringing
it pushes Clear
right out through my eyes
bleeding bleeding
no avail
Down my face
power of Candy
exhausted long ago
Unhappy candles
Ooze tentative changing
shadows
Streaming yellow lashes
Crying on the ground
Quiet sympathy
to Rivulets
of Liquid me
oh my
This is Halloween

That's the way the life is, nice caption
Life is so filled with people who like to hurt.

Some can seen so sincere, then find their just a flirt.

Others just want a roll in the sack.

Then pat their hand on their on back.

We have all left behind some pain.

Then came here to help ease our strain.

I am a real simple man, I have nothing but who I am.

Trying just to live and give,

My thoughts, my mind, and make some grins.

Through doing this I have found some great friends.

From my first words here over two years ago.

I have stayed me. Real, true, and trying to grow.

Read me back to when I first started.

Same Ole'me same fool hearted.

Yes, I have called out many for their truth.

Its just me, sometimes I feel like Dr. Ruth.

Fake personalities seem to attract the same.

Then they feel normal playing their game.

Overly inflating each others ego.

Knowing they can't ever really let-go.

Try not to allow yourselves to get abused.

Stay away from the ones who only want to use.

Don't give any money to your honey.

I don't care how much you feel them nice, and funny.

Don't truly believe in who they are.

Until you have them close and not far.

Make sure they have more than just one real picture.

Not a mess of cartoons and a one pic mixture.

If you talk by phone, but they set the hours to call.

Surprise them once in awhile, and see where the cards fall.

If this all seems a bit much, and it shows you lack trust.

I feel if they tell ya they love you, some our a must.

I've known about six couples here who were in love for a year

But felt that their other truly loved them dear.

All of them learned their other had lied.

They all felt shattered, broken and then cried.

I gave you this poem so you would know to.

Its alot better to be, truly just you.