Self-care is important, especially for women to keep their hormonal balance right.

Many women tend to please, give more than they get, often not receive anything or unable to let it in.
If you feel it's natural for you to serve and please you're hormones are almost for certain out of whack.

The only healthy way of giving for a woman is in response to receiving.
If you haven't and still give you will produce testosterone which will A) lower your oestrogen (very unhealthy!!) and B) deplete your progesterone as a woman makes testosterone out of progesterone.
Then you get oestrogen domination even though your oestrogen is too low.

Too low levels of oestrogen is a serious health risk: inflammation (heart, joints etc.), diabetes, high cholesterol, cardiovascular disease, and so on.
It also wreaks havoc on your mood and how you feel.

In essence saying it's natural to give, serve, please, etc. isn't true. It's caused by hormones and that disruption can be created by low self-esteem, lack of self-love and so on.
The only natural care giving is to a baby (young) child. Which btw is also hormone-driven...

Self-care is good, can help raise oestrogen.
Self-care is also receiving. Love, gifts, compliments, help from others, and so on.

I think I once gave that a go and didn't like it, but I can try again.
I have watched Shetland, loved that!!
The new season is a bit off now that Douglas Henshall has left the series.

As it is finished the last couple of episodes of Outlander.

I just did a bit more. Didn't have time this afternoon, had wanted to have a break today, but yeah... Hihi. Couldn't help myself!

Apart from the obvious, the path and the tree, I did some fine work on the fighters. The front most Highlander had a bit of a nose job, the redcoats' coats are redder and less of the darker shadow stuff, and so on.
Tiny tweaks that do make a difference :)

If you do so, enjoy it!
I think Malta, Greece, or Turkey is good this time a year :)

Thank you so much, Julie!

Quite normal in Scotland, isn't it, hihi.

Thank you!

OT - Lot of work done this afternoon!




A close-up of the soldiers & Highlanders. I'll do a few minor updates here and there, thin lines, nothing major anymore.

Sphinx by Robin Cook.
I used to own a copy, bought another one the other day. 2nd hand as it's out of print.

One of the few non-medical thrillers Robin Cook has written.

5C sunny. Outside still quite a lot of white, although not covering everything.

Roads can be slippery and we still get night frost.
I'm starting to get fed up with it even though it's not too bad and normal this time a year.

Ah, that makes sense then. Still, very cold!!

Thank you, Julie!

I've done more work today. Did the mist over the men in the background, immediately creating more depth :)
And begun with another layer, a highlander that's a wee bit closer than those in the fog. There will be at least one more.

Made the kilts of the highlanders in the foreground a bit lighter, and added highlights to the uniforms of the redcoats as I felt they'd gotten too dark.
And some definition of the grass. I don't think that needs much detail as there will be fog as well, but I might go for a bit here and there nonetheless.

Also did some fine detailed work on the cottage, like making the door brown, make the windows deeper, added more deep red to the roof etc.
Stuff you won't easily see perhaps, but still make a difference.

Not unless you wish to call science & psychology a romance novel, hihi.
What I am telling is reality.

It never ceases to surprise me how little people know and understand of how we 'work' when it comes to relationships.
When you explain them -still in understandable language- they get all awkward, sometimes nasty even, and dismissive.
That's in general, not talking about you, so don't take offense.
But this subject is what I've studied to great length, still do,-and even taught courses about.

All what I'm saying is based on hormonal workings and psychology, aka science...

This knowledge has been out there for decades yet hardly anyone knows about it! Even in spite of thousands being single and could benefit greatly from it.
That's what I find weird, but alas.

Did fine-tuning of the cottage, subtle things.
And spent some time working on the Highlanders & soldiers. Lots of fine detail.
The greyish figures in the back are exactly that: figures in the background. They'll be in quite thick fog and a few more will be added with more detail, a wee bit more in the foreground.

A mother myself, I can understand how awful it must be to now come across this information.
Let's hope doctors have become wiser and now swab babies' mouths after C-sections.
As for your boys, maybe you can find some help for them in the alternative? Homeopathy or acupuncture could be of help. And even Eden Energy Medicine therapists. I know there are many all over the US.
Or a very good naturopath.
Could very well be that your boys' gut health isn't solid but can be improved. That could do a lot for their overall health & well-being.

Haha, an unfortunate mistake on my part.
I can't edit anymore so let's hope people are intelligent enough to not fear their child is going to be swapped for another.

Thank you, Julie :)

OT - today I decided to work on Leanach cottage first, which I've done. Nearly finished with it, some fine touches and shading etc. left to do.
I didn't work on the Highlanders or soldiers, spent all my time on the cottage.

Sure as heck brings more life into it all, doesn't it?!

-37C??? In the States?

some 2-4C mostly cloudy although I saw a tad of blue sky in the afternoon.
We had hail, snow, sleet, rain, and strong wind.

As we speak (midnight) it's 1C but feels like -5C.

I've started my Culloden Battle painting.
It took me some time to work out the composition I could live with. In essence I wanted to paint the Leanach Cottage, then out of the blue I felt like painting a misty part of the battle behind it. I really liked that, but then got into trouble due to the size of the canvas.
In the end I worked it out, cottage a bit further back, soldiers a bit to the foreground. (I had wanted it the other way round at first)

The soldiers will be painted in full detail, then I will put them in a misty setting. Hooray for having bought zinc white which is rather transparent! I hadn't expected it to need it again so soon after the Great Wall!

The cottage will be clear & bright, in full (sun) light.

Yesterday I got the basics done:



I've done a lot of work on the soldiers today. Not done yet, but for today it was enough.
Also altered the colour of the roof so it has the right colour to work with now :)
You cannot really tell, but it is a substantial difference. From the purplish blocking colour to a dark brown-red, it's true base colour.

That will be often be different for men and women.
Many men don't feel the need to get married or married again.
Especially not if they've been married before. They reason logically. It costs money, if we break up it costs money. They'll say, "what difference does it make? None!"

To a man making money, providing, being successful that way is extremely important for his sense of well-being, of being a man.

For a woman on the other hand marriage means a deeper commitment than 'just' a relationship.
For women safety is of the utmost importance. Only if she feels safe is she able to fully open up, thrive, grow, and love.
Marriage gives her that sense of safety, knowing he won't just bugger off on a whim, won't easily fall for another -maybe younger- woman, knowing and feeling he chooses her.
It's a big statement, and one a woman generally needs for reasons mentioned above.

So if a man wants his partner to be able to fully blossom and to feel safe, she can be totally vulnerable and open to a much deeper level for him, he gives her that gift. It allows her to grow in her love for her man.

This is stuff few people know.
Men generally think she's after his money, doesn't understand how incredibly important feeling safe is for a woman, which has nothing to do with his money.


As for what's better for you... only you can tell. If you want marriage then that's what is best for you. Don't compromise because of a man. Instead learn to convey your needs properly to a man so he understands why it's so important to you.