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| Topic: any advice?? | |
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Debbie, In case you can't conceive and (there is always hope) adoption is a wonderful option. It doesn't take conception to be a mom. You'll love the child the same.  I was in the process of an adoption when I did conceive my 2nd son. It wasn't my choice, the adoption agency stoped the process, it was their policy. hi shaden. i want to experience being pregnant, and i want my own baby, i dont want to adopt. |
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Just remember there are a lot of single guys with kids nowadays. You could always be a step mom. that wouldnt work for me. |
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also i could have addisons, if not that i defintly have a cortisol defincy. ive also been diagnosed with cluster headaches which are so painful i could bang my head of the wall.
if you put the endometriosis pain, with the cluster headache pain, i really dont want to be alive. and knowing ill have this pain for life is very daunting. 
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and what man would want a women when she may not be able to conceive. sometimes i dont even feel like a women, i feel like a nobody
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debs ..i think you need some councelling and talk to some one love who understands..here isnt a good a place to talk about this i dont think!! its a private thing about you and you need to confide in someone who can help you...i am sorry though ... I think thats the best piece of advice in this thread. I know it helps to try and talk about it, I know you need our support and i think we all do understand that. I do agree though, that when it gets down to the nitty gritty, you need to seek help from a professional. We are not trained in this, and you may get the wrong advice. |
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as some of you might know i have endometriosis, doctors have said it will take me longer to get pregnant, and plenty practising lol and i should be fine, they said on a fertiltly point of view things look good, because my tubes were free of the endometriosis. however i asked one doctor if i could get pregnant, and he said to me, WELL I WOULDNT PUT MONEY ON IT. ive saw about 6 different doctors and he was the only thats said that. the problem is, everytime i see a pregnant women, my heart bleeds and i feel so depressed and upset and theres been times ive felt suicidal, incase i cant get pregnant. women were put on this earth to conceive and i might not be able to, i feel totally worthless and just a waste of space, and i feel i dont have a purpose to be alive sometimes.i cant even have a job because i cant work because im always in so much pain with the endometriosis. my dream in life is to settle down and have a baby, thats why i get so upset when i see someone pregnant, and if i see a newborn baby i just want to hold him/her, as i may never get the chance. how can i stop feeling like this?? Just as those who want to experience childbirth and experience holding their own children. If it is not possible, are you drawing the line? I have been chastized for not having the maternal instinct and those who are calling me selfish for not procreating. I feel that so many children are born without substantial parents, yet there are those who simply want that experience and I have to wonder why? |
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debs ..i think you need some councelling and talk to some one love who understands..here isnt a good a place to talk about this i dont think!! its a private thing about you and you need to confide in someone who can help you...i am sorry though ... I think thats the best piece of advice in this thread. I know it helps to try and talk about it, I know you need our support and i think we all do understand that. I do agree though, that when it gets down to the nitty gritty, you need to seek help from a professional. We are not trained in this, and you may get the wrong advice. ive tried to talk to professionals but i break down,,and cry so bad i have a panic attack and collapse on the floor. thats why i posted on here, because i havnt got to talk to anyone. |
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as some of you might know i have endometriosis, doctors have said it will take me longer to get pregnant, and plenty practising lol and i should be fine, they said on a fertiltly point of view things look good, because my tubes were free of the endometriosis. however i asked one doctor if i could get pregnant, and he said to me, WELL I WOULDNT PUT MONEY ON IT. ive saw about 6 different doctors and he was the only thats said that. the problem is, everytime i see a pregnant women, my heart bleeds and i feel so depressed and upset and theres been times ive felt suicidal, incase i cant get pregnant. women were put on this earth to conceive and i might not be able to, i feel totally worthless and just a waste of space, and i feel i dont have a purpose to be alive sometimes.i cant even have a job because i cant work because im always in so much pain with the endometriosis. my dream in life is to settle down and have a baby, thats why i get so upset when i see someone pregnant, and if i see a newborn baby i just want to hold him/her, as i may never get the chance. how can i stop feeling like this?? Just as those who want to experience childbirth and experience holding their own children. If it is not possible, are you drawing the line? I have been chastized for not having the maternal instinct and those who are calling me selfish for not procreating. I feel that so many children are born without substantial parents, yet there are those who simply want that experience and I have to wonder why? im sorry, i dont understand
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i wish my dream wasnt to have children, because its so hard when you want something so bad, and you may never get it.
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Maybe God has a different plan for you. I can't say I understand because I have 3 beautiful children. I do sympathize and will keep you in my prayers, though. Motherhood is an amazing,frustrating,wonderful,painful experience all rolled into one. But changing the life of an unwanted,unloved child can be just as rewarding. Don't give up. Miracles happen everyday. But please don't close the door on other options.
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Maybe God has a different plan for you. I can't say I understand because I have 3 beautiful children. I do sympathize and will keep you in my prayers, though. Motherhood is an amazing,frustrating,wonderful,painful experience all rolled into one. But changing the life of an unwanted,unloved child can be just as rewarding. Don't give up. Miracles happen everyday. But please don't close the door on other options. i wont give up. im glad youve experienced being a mother. |
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My cousin, who is 25, has endometriosis. When we was in her late teens/early twenties, she had two miscarriages. She could get pregnant but couldn't carry pass 11 weeks. A few years later, she met a new guy and eventually got married. I am hoping that I have my information straight, but the doctor's did surgery to scrape out the scar tissue and if that didn't work they were going to put her in a type or menopause or something for 6 months and then reverse it. However, after the surgery, she got pregnant with twins. She was a basket case until she passed the 11th week. However, she did miscarriage one of the twins, but she's got a beautiful son who turned 1 in December. She's even talking about adopting another children. She had so many complications during her pregnancy.
Debbie, you aren't wasted space even if you can't have children. I know it's not the same thing, but there is always adoption. There's so many children out there that don't have a mother who feels as strongly as you do about motherhood. There's always a reason for everything that happens, even if you can't see what that reason is. |
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My cousin, who is 25, has endometriosis. When we was in her late teens/early twenties, she had two miscarriages. She could get pregnant but couldn't carry pass 11 weeks. A few years later, she met a new guy and eventually got married. I am hoping that I have my information straight, but the doctor's did surgery to scrape out the scar tissue and if that didn't work they were going to put her in a type or menopause or something for 6 months and then reverse it. However, after the surgery, she got pregnant with twins. She was a basket case until she passed the 11th week. However, she did miscarriage one of the twins, but she's got a beautiful son who turned 1 in December. She's even talking about adopting another children. She had so many complications during her pregnancy.
Debbie, you aren't wasted space even if you can't have children. I know it's not the same thing, but there is always adoption. There's so many children out there that don't have a mother who feels as strongly as you do about motherhood. There's always a reason for everything that happens, even if you can't see what that reason is. |
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My cousin, who is 25, has endometriosis. When we was in her late teens/early twenties, she had two miscarriages. She could get pregnant but couldn't carry pass 11 weeks. A few years later, she met a new guy and eventually got married. I am hoping that I have my information straight, but the doctor's did surgery to scrape out the scar tissue and if that didn't work they were going to put her in a type or menopause or something for 6 months and then reverse it. However, after the surgery, she got pregnant with twins. She was a basket case until she passed the 11th week. However, she did miscarriage one of the twins, but she's got a beautiful son who turned 1 in December. She's even talking about adopting another children. She had so many complications during her pregnancy. Debbie, you aren't wasted space even if you can't have children. I know it's not the same thing, but there is always adoption. There's so many children out there that don't have a mother who feels as strongly as you do about motherhood. There's always a reason for everything that happens, even if you can't see what that reason is. [/quote i never knew if you had endometriosis, you were at risk of having a miscarriage, so i just feel even worse now. i wish i didnt start the thread. i dont want to adopt, i want to experience being pregnant, and having a baby grow inside me. im glad she got a little boy, thats great news. |
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My cousin, who is 25, has endometriosis. When we was in her late teens/early twenties, she had two miscarriages. She could get pregnant but couldn't carry pass 11 weeks. A few years later, she met a new guy and eventually got married. I am hoping that I have my information straight, but the doctor's did surgery to scrape out the scar tissue and if that didn't work they were going to put her in a type or menopause or something for 6 months and then reverse it. However, after the surgery, she got pregnant with twins. She was a basket case until she passed the 11th week. However, she did miscarriage one of the twins, but she's got a beautiful son who turned 1 in December. She's even talking about adopting another children. She had so many complications during her pregnancy. Debbie, you aren't wasted space even if you can't have children. I know it's not the same thing, but there is always adoption. There's so many children out there that don't have a mother who feels as strongly as you do about motherhood. There's always a reason for everything that happens, even if you can't see what that reason is. and i am a waste of space, a women is put on earth to reproduce, what mans going to want someone who might not be able to get pregnant. no one needs me anyway, all i know is if i cant have my own baby, then i dont want to suffer life anymore as in the constant pain i get every day. |
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to all the people who have read this, feel blessed that you have been able to have children, and never take for granted you have beautiful children. when you see your child next give he or she a kiss and feel blessed you were able to kiss your own child. some of us will never be able to do that.
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Edited by
symbelmyne
on
Sun 03/02/08 06:42 PM
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Women are more than just incubators Debbie, if that is what you are valuing your life is as a woman, you are going to be a very unhappy and tortured woman for the rest of your life.
women create, its our nature to "give birth"...to ideas, creations even life if its is within us to do.... Broaden your horizons, expand your narrow definition of what it means to be a woman and you'll survive this and go on to birth many great things.... |
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Women are more than just incubators Debbie, if that is what you are valuing your life is as a woman, you are going to be a very unhappy and tortured woman for the rest of your life. women create, its our nature to "give birth" to new life...ideas, creations even life if its is within us to do.... Broaden your horizons, expand your narrow definition of what it means to be a woman and you'll survive this and go on to birth many great things.... what im saying is, we are all put on earth for different reasons, when we grow up we learn what we want to do in life, for some its a career, etc. since the age of 14, i knew my purpose in life and what i wanted was to settle down and have a baby. the thought of that not happening breaks my heart. i will never give up trying, i will try anything. i suffer this pain daily, because im hoping i will get pregnant and having all that pain for years was worth it. if i cant get pregnant, i dont think i could carry on, i couldnt live the rest of my life with this pain and get nothing out of it. i was diagnosed at 17, im neally 28 now, i pray that all that pain ive had and have now is worth it, and i have a beautiful baby, i will then forget all the pain, and operations i went through. |
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and what man would want a women when she may not be able to conceive. sometimes i dont even feel like a women, i feel like a nobody Debbie, There are quite a few men that don't want to have children. There are also many men that can't produce children. |
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as some of you might know i have endometriosis, doctors have said it will take me longer to get pregnant, and plenty practising lol and i should be fine, they said on a fertiltly point of view things look good, because my tubes were free of the endometriosis. however i asked one doctor if i could get pregnant, and he said to me, WELL I WOULDNT PUT MONEY ON IT. ive saw about 6 different doctors and he was the only thats said that. the problem is, everytime i see a pregnant women, my heart bleeds and i feel so depressed and upset and theres been times ive felt suicidal, incase i cant get pregnant. women were put on this earth to conceive and i might not be able to, i feel totally worthless and just a waste of space, and i feel i dont have a purpose to be alive sometimes.i cant even have a job because i cant work because im always in so much pain with the endometriosis. my dream in life is to settle down and have a baby, thats why i get so upset when i see someone pregnant, and if i see a newborn baby i just want to hold him/her, as i may never get the chance. how can i stop feeling like this?? Therapy.... find a good counsellor..one that specialises in women's fertility, and women, in general. |
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