whats the first thing a blonde says when she wake up in the morning?
are you all from the same team

alrite i cant really do jokes but i can do pick up lines.. such as.. Q:
was ur daddy a meat robber? A: cause it look like he stole to fine hams
n shoved them down the back of ur dress..... another sure lol... Q: did
u wash ur pants in windex A: caz i can see myself in them

oh that's why i got slapped, i said was your daddy a meat robber?
because you look like a big ham he stole from the butcher

an old lady goes into a pet shop looking for just the right pet, as she
walks by a cage with a frog in it the frog says buy me you won't be
sorry, so she buys the frog, on the way home the frog is in a box on the
seat beside her he says kiss me you won't be sorry, so she kisses him,
he turns into a sexy young hunk, what dose the old woman turn
into?........................
the nearest motel I said she was old...not dead

two guys walk into bar you would have thought the second guy would have
seen it coming

A priest and a rabbi are fishing. The priest catches a fish.

Rabbi: Nice Sonbitch you got there Father
Priest: Why u swearing Rabbi
Rabbi: No you dont understand. Thats what its called A Sonbitch

Priest gets home and holds up the fish

Priest: Look at the nice Sonbitch I caught everyone
Sister Margret: Fr. why u swearing
Priest: No thats what kind of fish it is
Sister: Ok I'll clean it then

Hey Frank, nun says to the cook
Sister: Look at the nice Sonbitch Fr. McGinty caught
Cook: Why u swearing sister
Sister: No thats what its called
Cook: Ok I'll cook it then

They sit down to a nice meal when all of a sudden the Pope arrives.
Priest: Your holiness have a seat and join us
Pope: Thank you so much

After eating the first bite the Pope says;
Wow this is the best fish i ever tasted

Priest: Yes I caught the Sonbitch
Sister: I cleaned the Sonbitch
Cook: I cooked the Sonbitch

The Pope stands up and holds out his arms and says

"I Love You Fuckers!!!"

lmfaooooooooooooooo

why do blonde girls have bruises on their belly?
cause blonde guys are dumb too

A rich white man threw a party and invited all of his buddies and
neighbors,
including Leroy, the only black guy in the neighborhood.
He held the party around the pool in the backyard f his mansion.
Everyone was
having a good time drinking, dancing, eating BBQ and flirting with the
women.
At the height of the party, the host said, "I came home from a business
trip and
I found a 10 foot alligator got in my pool and I can't find anybody who
will
come and take him away.
I'd give a million dollars to anyone who would do the job!"
The words were barely out of his mouth when there was a loud splash and
everyone
turned around and saw Leroy in the pool!
Leroy was fighting the gator and kicking its ass!
He was jabbing it in the eyes with his thumbs, throwing punches, head
butts and
chokeholds, biting the gator on the tail and flipping it through the air
like
some kind of Kung-Fu master.
The water was churning and splashing in the struggle.
Finally Leroy strangled the gator and let it float to the surface. He
slowly
climbed out of the pool. Everybody was staring in disbelief.
Finally the host says, "Leroy, I reckon I owe you a million dollars." "I
don't
want it," said Leroy, panting.
The rich man said, "Leroy, I have to give you something!
You won the bet." Leroy said, "I would be satisfied if you gave me the
name of
whichever one of these white motherf**kers it was that pushed me in the
pool."

I've got a blonde joke.

One day a blonde was driving down a highway that had pastures on both
sides. She comes across another blonde in a row boat in one of the
pastures. She is rowing furiously, and not going anywhere. The blonde in
the car turns to her companion and says, "I have half a mind to swim out
there and kick her ass!!"

there's 3 brunettes and a blonde riding in the back of a pickup when the
driver loses control and plunges the truck into a lake.
every one got out alive except for the blonde who ended up
drowning...she could not get the tail gate down

ok, i have a good one;
Q:why don't eskimo women douche intide?
A:cause it's too damn cold outside!!

Q:what does an old woman's snatch smell like?
A: depends.

I accidentally ran over my dogma with my karma this morning :-(

just be carefull, who You tell that clock store joke to.
I just heard the end of it when the sels clerk pulled twizers and
magnifying glass and said
" I nee those for such a fragile and puny item"

from dukes of hazzard...what do you call a farmer with a sheep under
each arm......a playboy