I've been with my husband 29yre, since my teens. He passed away at 47 this year. it was a very toxic marriage, but we stayed with loyalty and pushed through it, but he was non affectionate and very distant and I'm a loving caregiver. I've never dated and I'm nervous but I want to find someone who's actually a loving friend, but how to find that?

My condolences Sandy and Truly sorry for your loss. I as well just separated after a 20 year relationship...therefore this online dating or dating scene is def new and has changed. Yet what I have realized over these past 2 weeks on the site....just enjoy the experience and have fun meeting new and interesting people without any expectations. I may have NOT found that special person as of yet.... however it's the excitement and thrill of the search and journey that keeps my spirit up. I AM LIVING once again and NO longer just existing...wooohoo..... I believe it's when we quit searching for love that LOVE will magically and mysteriously find us. Friendship take time and well at this moment I have plenty of FREE time...yet def NOT getting any younger LOL Hope you enjoy the rest of your day and weekend. As Always keep smiling and enjoy the journey. just my 2 cents

Sorry to hear that.
Life must go on.

You can browse forum games to divert your mind for little time an check other section too.

Good Time.

Sandy probably just a coincidence but you remind me of giagia … the two of you have much in common.

Can I be honest? I would not date anyone yet. Let the scars heal properly first.

I thought that too. Giagia has made a few posts. You should be able to find them and can read the responses. I'm sure that will help.

Sorry for your loss!

I agree with Larsi above--it might be wise to take some time before starting to date. Not necessarily because of grieving, but because you've been through a difficult marriage. You said he was non-affectionate and distant while you are loving. That takes its toll on a person. Your self-esteem has probably taken a beating. Take some time to work on you. Post in the forums, practice flirting again, have fun with the other posters. Use this as a chance to dip your toe in, but it might be smart to take it slow. You'll attract (and expect) the kind of relationship you deserve when you are healed and are your best self. I wish you all the best in this new chapter of your life.

I agree with Larsi & Bonnie: probably best to take some time to heal.
And indeed not just to get over and place the loss but also to recover from a difficult relationship.
I've been in a very difficult relationship myself, little loving from him, lots of abuse and conflict. Took me 2 years to heal from that and to find my own sense of self and self-confidence again.

Jumping right into something after loss of relationship is called 'being on the rebound'. Won't do you nor the other any good.