Some people may not understand this, but hook ups aren't just about sex. You go on dates, you talk, you drink, you make out in the parking lot, you go to his/her sad-looking apartment, you ****, you cuddle, you talk again, you smoke, you drink, and then you sleep some more.

You begin to have a hint of who they are. You begin to peek through their human aspects—their favorite songs, the films that made them cry, their opinions on politics, the most random ideas popping in their head, their scent, the taste of their lips, and the ways they fall asleep and look vulnerable. You feel as though you deeply know them, when in reality, they are only strangers with names and faces that somehow became familiar to you.

You see, it's so easy to fall in love with them. But you don't. In the morning, you'll casually pick up your dress, bid each other goodbye, and go on with your life as though you two never met.

It has always been the question, how can people share intimacy with strangers?

Maybe because it’s never a genuine connection that you feel, but maybe it’s seeing them that touches your heart and reminds you of a part of yourself that you lost-- a kind of nostalgic yearning for an unidentifiable want.

Maybe you didn't want the sex. You wanted the escape.

Maybe it’s looking through their eyes that you see a sad reflection of yourself, not theirs.

We often attempt to relieve our loneliness with the illusions of security that temporary meaningless relationships give us, and we unknowingly set ourselves up for the trap of believing that, in the end, we could win back our souls.

It's kind of a main feature, though -not that I do such.

Nice speech...and if you did not list "intimate encounter" as one of your objectives in your profile, it may have been more credible...

Hello Kael Wondering if perhaps you are projecting your own values or conflicted experiences of hookups . For many ....hookups are about no- committment lust ... nothing more .

Curious ...

Do you feel it is a prerequisite for a hookup ...to spend the night together ... That there has to be Emotional sharing ???

OP...tell yourself whatever you want to self-justify your actions...

...but a hook-up is all about the sex, only about the sex, and has nothing but the sex.

That’s right hookup is all about pleasure with no commitment

I am sorry, but if you go into it with the intention that all it is going to be is a hookup, then it's all about the sex. That was the main goal. The whole enchilada. Physical gratification for ones self with no emotional attachment.

Now can hookups happen that are unintentional? Yes, if both partners are simply not sexually compatible at all. That you usually don't find out until after the first several times, since let's face it the first time is often awkward at best or very one sided. We are just not comfortable yet to let go, if we want to actually want it to go somewhere. At that time however, it is no longer a hookup either.

With a hookup you don't care. Like it, dont like it, who cares, it's a one time thing.

agree

Here where I come from that's known as hanging out with your mates, not a hook up! There's a difference, believe me? A hook up here is a meeting for sex, not what you've described!

If only I could find my new girlfriend, "Goldilocks".