I agree babe, make sure the girl is safe. Even if you have to do so through her parents or whatever. Get her away from the a**hole!

I hear most of the ppl on here saying "Stay out of it". Why? Why should he stay out of it? When anyone is being abused, its everyone's business. I'm sorry for those who've never been there, but that's just how it is. I don't care how much someone yells for you to stay out of it, you butt in and you KEEP butting in until you get SOMEONE to get that person to safety. I never want to see another person die from domestic violence. I not only lost my sister, but my entire family changed when she died. Not even just my mom, nephew and I. My ENTIRE family. I pretty much lost everyone to the grief. We're getting it back together now, 8 years later. Long story short, domestic violence doesn't JUST hurt the person being abused, it also hurts everyone who loves that person. You live fairly close to me, maybe I can help you.

I've been through what he's going through, the girls family and I tried so hard to get her to leave but she wouldn't. She did finally leave not because of us but because she finally grew up some and realized where it was all going. Some of these people are saying to stay out of it maybe 'cause they've seen a similar situation - the guy is an @$$ but the girl won't leave because she has so infatuated herself with "love" of this person. Now I'm not saying DON'T step in, one should! She's young and needs guidance, she needs a friend. Some way some how she'll come to realize she deserves so much more out of life.

How is he abusive towards her?

And how do you know for a fact?


Where are her parents?

The police?

If you know for a fact he is abusive physically, because you have witnessed it, and done nothing, or even seen bruises, or worse, then report it, it is a crime to hit another, it's called assault.

Report it.


Step up to the plate, report the abuse, and stick your own agenda back in your pocket. Whether she wants you or not, if she is being abused...be a FRIEND.

You couldn't get better advice Cory..listen to Jess

also i think maybe u need to talk to her parents and share this information if u really care.....

There is an organization that may help. It is called CASA (citizens against spousal abuse). They are located in almost every town in the country...give them a call and ask what can be done. I believe they will help even if your friend is not married. They will guide her to get a restraining order against her boyfriend, and even go to court with her. They also offer counseling. Good luck to you.

Speaking from experience (a long time ago) I actually isolated myself from my family and friends because I didn't want anyone to know. I actually could have used a friend.

She is confused and doesn't need more of it, so don't tell her you want her, but just be there for her. She will want to talk. Give her some options for a safe way out, maybe shelters or organizations to help.

But, yes, she won't leave until she's convinced this relationship is abusive

Dude! You have time. Just wait patiently in the stands while she learns to be a stronger woman.

However, it is possible to send her Flowers and cards as a Mysterious Admirer.

Only reveal yourself when she is completely single and there's no possibility of you being killed by the other guy.

the best thing to do is just be her friend until she is ready to leave him, she will not leave if you keep telling her he is bad for her.
its hard i know cos i've been through this with a family member and she left him on her own accord. just be her friend its all you can do.

Just possibly keep in mind that most anger wouldn't be taken out on the admirer, but most likely her.

Retraction: mmmmmmmmmm! I'll go with that. You know. She may not have the chemistry for you anyway..... so being supportive is your best bet..... but also keep your distance. Don't let her use you as her cry shoulder.

Contact her once every other month and check if she's finally come to her senses.

Better suggestion. No waste of money and time on something that may have not worked out anyway.

Hey, also, even if she left this guy today forever, she is not mentally ready for a good guy. She is a walking hurt. Plus, usually people who are abused get into similar situations until they figure out why they do that.

She needs professional help and a friend, so good luck.

walk away dude, i have done that and it back fired in my face and now that person is not my friend and in fact my life was threatened, it is best to keep your distance, and let what happens, happen. if its meant to be it will happen for you

you are being delusional, to think that you intervening will save her, its a common thing, man, they complain about the guy and want to leave him, but when it comes time, she will not leave him and if you ineterfere, she will hate you and blame you for what ever happens, get away and stay away, there will be a point when she realizes whats happening, but not right now, and maybe not in the next 5 years. by that time you will have already moved on, so move on

I have spoken to him about this and the girl is only 16 years old, someone has to help this child. If he won't, who will? More people need to be less worried about if they're gonna be hated or threatened, and more worried about saving the innocent life at hand. My sister was only 18 when she was murdered, this girl is younger than her. I'm sorry if I'm offending anyone, but I'm on whatever side helps this child the most, and sitting back doing nothing wont' do that. The kid hitting her is only 17, so if someone steps in there may still be hope for this boy if he gets help. He said he HAS seen him hit her before. He doesn't live that far from me, so i'm gonna see if there's any way at all I can help this little girl.