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| Topic: THIS IS THE DEAL | |
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Edited by
wmyers4u
on
Thu 12/13/07 02:50 PM
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and? did you make a poor or good choice in marriage partner? Nope. He was and is a good man---and as far as I'm concerned, my marriage was not a failure as we were together for so long. However, situations and people change and it doesn't matter how hard one works, plans, and schemes. Sounds like a lack of commitment. How many children were affected? You are naive. The real world is not black and white. Perhaps you should take a few philosophy classes. Knowing what I want makes me naive? I disagree. This is not a challenge about education, why not stick to the topic. I think she is referring to the fact that you cannot predict the future or determine how things will work out based upon who the person is today. As an example, lets say you find the man you are looking for. 10 years from now his very successful career becomes so stressful that he has a nervous breakdown and gambles everything away and the two of you end up living in that trailer park. Is it your fault for not picking someone else to marry? |
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I do realize you are probally looking for your equal in education.ambition and goals.why marry a ditch digger who will only resent the fact you are better educated and make more money than him.But please dont think indescretions are inevitable.a person who has strength of character and takes his marriage vows seriously will never cheat.good luck in your search and welcome.
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Ok I'm back. Hmmmmmm. Gotta give savagirl credit. She stated her opine. And she stuck to her guns. She never waivered from her selling points. She debated you all well and never let her emotions get in her way. Maybe we didn't hear some issues we didn't like concerning moral issues but hey really what's in your closet and wallet. She put it all out on the table. No BS here. Can you knock someone for different views. We all get knocked and have to roll with the punches. She's did 13 rounds and 13 pages with all of you and she's still standing. Ding! Ding! She's the winner as far as I'm concerned. Debate her. Don't scorn her. Advise her. Don't attack her. What's my problem? None. None whatsoever. And I don't want any. I do have a question for you savagirl and that is what went wrong with your last relationship? Be honest. Did you grow apart? Was he too family as in controlled by his parents orientated? Was there infidelity issues involved? Did you cheat on him? What would he say regarding your breakup? That's all I have. I'd love to have a mutual life with someone. But I'm too old to raise children and I'm not too keen on having a relationship based on contractual obligations and what is expected of each other in one persons mind. There should be more sharing of ideas and mutual interests to keep spice in a lifelong relationship. I'm not interested in a boring unchallenging, non adventurous life. I live my life to its fullest and value every moment full of real love and sharing. I know the difference between right and wrong in my heart and choose the right thing all the time no matter what even if it hurts me. I live life with no regrets and I sleep every night with a clear concious. Wish I could find someone a bit like me.
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and? did you make a poor or good choice in marriage partner? Nope. He was and is a good man---and as far as I'm concerned, my marriage was not a failure as we were together for so long. However, situations and people change and it doesn't matter how hard one works, plans, and schemes. Sounds like a lack of commitment. How many children were affected? You are naive. The real world is not black and white. Perhaps you should take a few philosophy classes. Knowing what I want makes me naive? I disagree. This is not a challenge about education, why not stick to the topic. I think she is referring to the fact that you cannot predict the future or determine how things will work out based upon who the person is today. As an example, lets say you find the man you are looking for. 10 years from now his very successful career becomes so stressful that he has a nervous breakdown and gambles everything away and the two of you end up living in that trailer park. Is it your fault for not picking someone else to marry? Mostly, there are no guarantees. Still, choices must be made. I think most people DO ignore the red flags when choosing marriage partners. There is nothing wrong with doing the best you can. |
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Ok I'm back. Hmmmmmm. Gotta give savagirl credit. She stated her opine. And she stuck to her guns. She never waivered from her selling points. She debated you all well and never let her emotions get in her way. Maybe we didn't hear some issues we didn't like concerning moral issues but hey really what's in your closet and wallet. She put it all out on the table. No BS here. Can you knock someone for different views. We all get knocked and have to roll with the punches. She's did 13 rounds and 13 pages with all of you and she's still standing. Ding! Ding! She's the winner as far as I'm concerned. Debate her. Don't scorn her. Advise her. Don't attack her. What's my problem? None. None whatsoever. And I don't want any. I do have a question for you savagirl and that is what went wrong with your last relationship? Be honest. Did you grow apart? Was he too family as in controlled by his parents orientated? Was there infidelity issues involved? Did you cheat on him? What would he say regarding your breakup? That's all I have. I'd love to have a mutual life with someone. But I'm too old to raise children and I'm not too keen on having a relationship based on contractual obligations and what is expected of each other in one persons mind. There should be more sharing of ideas and mutual interests to keep spice in a lifelong relationship. I'm not interested in a boring unchallenging, non adventurous life. I live my life to its fullest and value every moment full of real love and sharing. I know the difference between right and wrong in my heart and choose the right thing all the time no matter what even if it hurts me. I live life with no regrets and I sleep every night with a clear concious. Wish I could find someone a bit like me. |
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and? did you make a poor or good choice in marriage partner? Nope. He was and is a good man---and as far as I'm concerned, my marriage was not a failure as we were together for so long. However, situations and people change and it doesn't matter how hard one works, plans, and schemes. Sounds like a lack of commitment. How many children were affected? You are naive. The real world is not black and white. Perhaps you should take a few philosophy classes. Knowing what I want makes me naive? I disagree. This is not a challenge about education, why not stick to the topic. I think she is referring to the fact that you cannot predict the future or determine how things will work out based upon who the person is today. As an example, lets say you find the man you are looking for. 10 years from now his very successful career becomes so stressful that he has a nervous breakdown and gambles everything away and the two of you end up living in that trailer park. Is it your fault for not picking someone else to marry? Mostly, there are no guarantees. Still, choices must be made. I think most people DO ignore the red flags when choosing marriage partners. There is nothing wrong with doing the best you can. |
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Ok I'm back. Hmmmmmm. Gotta give savagirl credit. She stated her opine. And she stuck to her guns. She never waivered from her selling points. She debated you all well and never let her emotions get in her way. Maybe we didn't hear some issues we didn't like concerning moral issues but hey really what's in your closet and wallet. She put it all out on the table. No BS here. Can you knock someone for different views. We all get knocked and have to roll with the punches. She's did 13 rounds and 13 pages with all of you and she's still standing. Ding! Ding! She's the winner as far as I'm concerned. Debate her. Don't scorn her. Advise her. Don't attack her. What's my problem? None. None whatsoever. And I don't want any. I do have a question for you savagirl and that is what went wrong with your last relationship? Be honest. Did you grow apart? Was he too family as in controlled by his parents orientated? Was there infidelity issues involved? Did you cheat on him? What would he say regarding your breakup? That's all I have. I'd love to have a mutual life with someone. But I'm too old to raise children and I'm not too keen on having a relationship based on contractual obligations and what is expected of each other in one persons mind. There should be more sharing of ideas and mutual interests to keep spice in a lifelong relationship. I'm not interested in a boring unchallenging, non adventurous life. I live my life to its fullest and value every moment full of real love and sharing. I know the difference between right and wrong in my heart and choose the right thing all the time no matter what even if it hurts me. I live life with no regrets and I sleep every night with a clear concious. Wish I could find someone a bit like me. I'm unsure your age, biker, but sounds like you've had some broken relationships. I'm consistent with many of your thoughts. My previous relationships ended for the following reasons: one, he was older, divorced and seemed to chicken out of having a serious relationship even though he approached me with that intention as we were dating. two, I broke up with him. He lied about being interested in family so that he could continue to date me. player. three, was an alcoholic. four, he was nice and had a lot going for him but seemed pressured by his own family, parents, that he resisted. These are a few cases, very simplified. |
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Youth is inexperience & stupidity. Hindsight is 20/20 for me 43 yrs old. Alas, if I could have known then what I know now.
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OMG, is this stupid thread still going? I have read it all over the last couple of days and haven't commented, but what the hell else is there to say about it, advise or dodge? Let this die for God's sake. The discussion is like kicking a dead horse. All it will do is degrede and rot. She won't change her mind, and niether will all of you. UGH!
 
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Many have made valid points. What it boils down to is, these qualities she searches for, are what she desires. Can't fault a person for being up-front and honest.
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OMG, is this stupid thread still going? I have read it all over the last couple of days and haven't commented, but what the hell else is there to say about it, advise or dodge? Let this die for God's sake. The discussion is like kicking a dead horse. All it will do is degrede and rot. She won't change her mind, and niether will all of you. UGH!
What's the big deal with continuing a thread? I LOVE to argue. It's actually one of my favourite things. |
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Gustava, have to say I enjoy reading your thoughts. You're usually right-on target.
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 15 pages of molehill and counting.....
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Sorry. 15 going on 16 pages. I'm preoccupied pushing buttons, getting dressed and brushing my teeth to get the cookie crumbs off.
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...Mostly, there are no guarantees. Still, choices must be made. I think most people DO ignore the red flags when choosing marriage partners. There is nothing wrong with doing the best you can. What I'm getting at is that none of us got married thinking it wasn't the right choice. None of us got married thinking we would someday be divorced. The person you are at 23 is not going to be the same person you will be at 35. Sorry, magical thinking is not going to change this. |
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Gustava, have to say I enjoy reading your thoughts. You're usually right-on target. Thank you. That's not something I generally hear... |
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Gustava, have to say I enjoy reading your thoughts. You're usually right-on target. Thank you. That's not something I generally hear... maybe you should become a lawyer...or are you? 
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Sorry. 15 going on 16 pages. I'm preoccupied pushing buttons, getting dressed and brushing my teeth to get the cookie crumbs off. That reminds me, I'm hungry. Crackers and pie crust sounds good
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Well thank you savagirl. I was enlightened. I enjoyed the conversation. It was a refreshing point of view. Good luck with your future. And greetings and welcome to just say hi.
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Gustava, have to say I enjoy reading your thoughts. You're usually right-on target. Thank you. That's not something I generally hear... maybe you should become a lawyer...or are you?
Heehee. No, I just play one on the internet. |
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