goodnight all. here's my problem.
i'm in love with my best friend. he and i were together as a couple earlier this year but i broke up with him twice, each time i regretted it immediately because i did so out of fear of commitment. i tried to apologize and get back on with the relationship but he says he would rather not and we should remain friends, even though he makes it obvious that he still has feelings for me. i don't want to be just friends with him. what do you guys think?

It almost sounds like deep down you are unsure of what you want. I think you should remain friends for a while and see if he becomes a little less gun shy towards you

I don't mean to sound harsh, but what did you expect. You've broken his heart twice, and now he's scared you're just going to do it again. My advise is to give it some time. Let his heart mend a little bit, then maybe he'll be ready to take that chance again.

If you can't be friends, and a relationship won't work, it's time to move on. Sorry, sometimes these things happen, but it's probably better you two just part ways.

Honestly, I think you broke his heart and now you are paying the price.

Not being mean, just the facts. you said you broke up with him twice earlier this year...you think he wants to play "Yo-Yo"? Not knowing when and if you will toss him aside again??

I know many women don;t believe it, but some guys have HEARTS too ya know!

So I think he is right to not be with you..at least right now. Let him heal and find himself again. You caused damage and if you do care about him, then let him heal before anything else.

Just my 1.387 cents worth.

well you could always hook up with me to make him jealous...

oh wait this is me we're talking about, dating me is like dating your wierd cousin nobody likes.

ok option #2 give it time and it will work itself out, maybe sit down and explain what your thinking and get his thoughts on it. a good heart to heart never hurt anybody...

except the guy who needed a transplant.

Wow broke up twice in a year or less.... I don't blame him for not wanting to be more than friends.... There must be a lot of hurt going on with both of you.
Did you break up for the same reason each time....
What are the regrets about....
Wishing you luck

i think that you might benefit from some counseling to overcome your fears. take care of this from your side first. later he might be able to do counseling with you if there is some desire to pursue a relationship. good luck and i am sorry to hear of your struggle.

sorry I could give you more, my two friends (yes they're the couple) has done the same thing...I'm hoping, for their sake that it works out this time...but its also causing some stuff with rift with her parents...so maybe a different situation then yours. I agree with staying friends right now... if you want to know, my friends are back together officially, haven't seen each other since they got back together because she lives a couple hours away from us...Its seems to be going okay...I'm praying for them...so...

Sorry goodness I don't know if that helped or not...probably not...but there you go...

if u want to stay with him this time bring him out with you and your friends. let him see how u are with other people im not talking about going out for lunch i mean a bar or club. when he sees how flirty other guys are with you he'll see you differently. I'm not saying for jealousy reasons but hell start looking deeper and then hell no if he wants to give you 2 another go. If not then hes just like me and my best friend. Me and her went out for a while broke up and did that like 3 or 4 times. But now we realize how much better off we are as friends. Let me no if my input helped at all if not im sorry.

Hope everything works out for you.........

~Alex~

he and i had been friends for 5 years before we got together. i can't imagine NOT being friends with him. we've gone through so much and he truly is my best friend. as much as it sucks not being his girlfriend it would suck even more if i moved on without that friendship in my life. i guess all i can do is accept that i did a foolish thing twice and bear it huh. thanks guys

Maybe you two need to sit down and have a heart to heart talk. Tell him how you are feeling and hope for the best. Just be honest with him. Open up to him and maybe he will see things in a different light. Does he know why you broke up with him? Good Luck

I think that you should try to find someone else and stay friends with him. If you find somebody else, you may forget about the love you once had with him. The problem is you broke up with him twice so the trust is gone in the relationship.

i had a girl crush me. i'd figure out and make sure you dont do it again whatever you decide.

yea he knows. and i have had a heart to heart talk with him a few times. we are really open with each other.

I think you need
to take some time
to decide what it
is you really want
in life.

Everyone goes through
a phase where they
aren't sure of what
they want to do or
who they want to be with.

In the meantime focus
on other priorities and
as you build up successes,
you will also grow in
confidence of your decisions.

This process takes time.

I don't know if you
are religious or not,
but if you are, perhaps
praying might help.

thanks mnhiker

She only wants what she can't have and when he does finally give in she will dump him again. I've been with women like you.

people like you make me want to drink Hun u hurt him u should be glad to have him as a friend

if may not be you it may be him..why didn't you want to commit to him maybe you sense something ..if you didn't want to commit and broke up because of that then he should somewhat understand because then you simply wan't really to make a committment ..explain that to him if he can't accept that then move on