If a man has real Interest in s woman, he will tell her.

Doesn't have to be an emotional rollercoaster for her to figure it out.

Look how men flirt with Some. Women, they aren't shy.

I f they don't like a woman, they don't DATE. her. Online or in Real life.

Comments?

Valid points.
But, it can't just be pinned on one gender anymore.

In this era of equality an' stuff, a woman should also
be able to 'step up', if she has an interest in someone..


Fair is fair. Right?

Well stated, equal rights are equal rights.

So basically, every woman that is single right now it's because no man "really" wants to date her?

Wow. Sucks for them.

i think people "our age" say 31 to 80 often think the man should make the first move. Youngsters 15 to 30 think I like Him/Her and am going to ask for a date. some of this is generational. However, I am not a shy person and have no problems striking up a conversation. On a couple occasions I asked if the man was married and when he said yes, I changed the subject. BUT there were a couple of situations where he was available and took me up on the suggestion of getting coffee. however, at that visit, I felt it was the man's responsibility to say thanks for the idea of coffee, would you like to ............whatever. and they did not. so. I do not know the answer.

I think there are many people who NEED that emotional roller-coaster to figure it out.
Too many people, IMO, have no idea who they want or the qualities in someone they would want.
They tend to fail to see the 'display' because they are more concentrated on reading the 'signs' they have convinced themselves are needed.

I am an easy person to get along with and I tend to respect people.
There are many women who find they really enjoy being around me but they convince themselves that something isn't right according to their preconceived signs.

The first thing I tell them is "You have NEVER me anyone like me before in your life" and most of the time, I am right. They actually tell me I am right.

Not many can accept me at face value because of so many times in their past they have experienced men that were not.

Not always. There's a difference between online and real life. Women flirt and play games as well, it's not just men.

People tend to be a bit more open online/text, some are also more inclined to play games and con people.

Either way, men are generally expected to confront women and express interest and initiate things.

This is not equality. Actually this is hidden inequality: you are saying now that we have equality women have to do the things a man does, or supposed to do.
That's NOT equality!
Equality is not women AGAIN having to change and do things to please men. We've had that for thousands of years already. It's suppression.
It's not a pissing contest and women having to compete with men to prove their worth, which is what it comes down to so far. That is NOT equality.

Equality is about MEN accepting, loving and respecting women for being a woman, and to stop treating women like inferior beings because she's a woman.
True equality is a woman being truly equal to a man EVEN THOUGH she doesn't behave like a man, for the simple reason she isn't one. Valuing woman BECAUSE she isn't like a man.
We are supposed to complement one another, not become clones. That's unisex and unisex is the farthest from equality you can get.

Equality is about embracing the fact that the feminine brings in valuable things that balances out the masculine, acknowledging that this influence is needed, and accepting that the feminine way is at times a better solution than the masculine way.

Most men who read this will feel emasculated, which shows how much work there is to be done still.

Very well said Crystal... I've never heard it explained so well, in a way that reflects the true meaning of equality. Thank you!

Thank you, and you're welcome

If a woman is incapable of stepping up,
and speaking up. Then, she is anything but equal.

I can understand some of what you're saying.
But, I fail to understand, how expecting someone
to speak up equally, is an inequality.

Nobody has time to guess.

Exactly,
Males are supposed to read minds and than take the blame when a relationship doesn't work as we initiated the relationship.
Simple tact that's been played over and over again.
Speak your peace women and we'll all get along just that much better.

I don't feel that is 'stepping up'. It is -and always has been- a woman's 'job' to be the first one to show a man she's interested. Like in the olden days woman drops her lacy kerchief, giving man the excuse to safely approach her.
Now we don't literally drop a kerchief, that would make things a lot easier, we have to do it in different ways otherwise nothing happens as only 10% of men feel confident enough to approach a woman without being given a sign from her.
So we have to look at a man and smile and do that so often that he gets we are interested in him. It's called 'rejection protection', to make a guy feel a bit safer that he won't get rejected and get his ego hurt.
So it's woman who takes the initiative, always has been like that. So we don't have to step up, we should just do what we've always done.
Also not a matter of 'fair is fair'. That's pure wounded ego. Like I said, it's not a pissing contest. It's about creating chemistry, and you won't get that by women behaving like a bloke.

Because it's not about equality or equal rights. Why when it comes to relationships do you men bring up the equal rights card? Why not just say you would love for a woman to show interest in you?

Who speaks up first has nothing to do with equality. It has to do with having the courage to express yourself. As we mature and evolve it becomes more comfortable to do that. To place expectations on it according to gender is counterproductive and creates a battle of the sexes rather than something that needs to happen naturally.

Being a woman, I have the desire to be desired... wanting a man to make the first move doesn't have to do with anything other than wanting to feel desired. It might sound silly to most of you men, but some how that feeling is lessened when I make the first move. I want to feel like of all the women out there, he recognized me and wants to get to know me.

Okay...

I've always approached the woman first,
if i'm interested. Without regard to a kerchief.

If, i know the woman's boundaries,
I express interest, within her boundaries.

If, a woman has interest in me,
but chooses not to let me know.
Then, i guess i will never know.

Stepping up / speaking up, is all about communication.
Be it, the spoken word, text, a kerchief, body language,
or smoke signals.

Nowhere, did i even imply, that communication should
ever be, less than a two way street.

Love that, River!
Apart from wanting to feel cherished I also want it to go that way because I need to be able to look up to a man, to respect him. If a man is too whimpsy (lol) to woo me I don't feel cherished, but also lose my respect and I cannot be in a relationship with a guy I don't respect.
The minute I lose respect for a man, the relationship is over.
Don't know if that is just me or a common thing?

I like smoke signals ;0)

Of course, but doesn't that simply mean she either isn't interested or not the right one or not ready?
Isn't that just one of these things that come with the territory? It happens the other way round too. Sometimes you shoot an arrow and it misses its target or it's the wrong target, hihi.

*lights another cigarette* hahaha

Thank you for clarifying. That makes sense and I agree, it is a two way street.

Maybe I've been a little lackadaisical in that way. I tend to sit back and wait for him to recognize me. Maybe he's doing the same, waiting for some sort of sign? I'm okay with showing interest and giving a little nudge... I think, lol. Guess that's where the fairness comes in... it's not fair to expect he approach me if I'm not willing to at least drop that handkerchief.

Is that more what you are saying?