that shows an utter ignorance of what is actually in the bible.

Yes, it is to be taken VERY literally, except in the places where it uses metaphorical imagery.

Look, I don't expect anyone who doesn't read the bible to be held to it. But c'mon...you guys quit acting like you know what's in it.

It can be taken as literally as any history book, or biography or other source that is not an autobiography(personally written by the subject or subjects of the book)

There is alot more to the Scriptures than what most people perceive. I might suggest, it might be an instruction book to a higher evolution.

Alot of people do not care for your opinions.

Frankly, my dead, I don't give a damn.

A lot of people also do not care for your opinion or your quotes, You really go overboard.

But you don’t seem to get it because others have also pointed it out.

Yawn

Yikes it’s scary up in here

Since the question is tied to being a christian, if you are not a christian you can do whatever you like.
Rules are for members. Basket ball players don't bother with baseball rules, they simply don't apply unless they are are playing baseball. Lawyers have to follow the law; Unless they don't get caught.

I'm not a christian, I can still have vanilla if I want, and also I can have any other flavour, since I am a godless heathen pagan hedonist. I can have vanilla and chocolate together. Rum and raisin with a chocolate starfish on top, and sprinkles. Fruit, and berries, and beer, and bacon. Don't tell the Inquisition.

But to answer the lovely OP's original question, if you joined the club and you are a serious member invested in the club, you should follow all the rules, according to the spirit of the game and the rule book, and push the rules as far as they can remain within the the spirit of the game, and committee sanction.
Play it up and push it until the umpire is getting suspicious.
Pick and choose which passages from which translation you want to adhere to, and tailor your christianity, within the words in all the books, to your particular bent.

You can't lie with a woman and her daughter, and bestiality is out.
Don't forget the bible talks about having slaves too, so if that is cool, pretty much anything goes within any interpretation. Maybe doing whatever with a slave is OK if it's not in the marital bed, but is allowed by the spouse.

And if it all gets too bogged down in dogma and ritual and interpretation, just go Rastafarian instead.

love it !

The marriage bed can only be as "pure" as we are.
And those who think they are "pure" are greatly deceived.

This passage isn't saying that sex should be pure. It's stating that sex is only pure within a married relationship. Otherwise, it is not pure.

good wives know how to love, honor, and Obey.

Obediente wives don't get into trouble.

And, if they do, it is in the service of her husband and she can expect him to try to "bail her out".

only test of purity in marriage bed is self-giving love. there are so many ways to be “impure” (or worse) in monogamous married relationships. sex is too complicated, too freighted with a person’s history (sexual and otherwise) to pretend that purity can be achieved by following a few rules. augustine said sex before eden was soooo much better. it’s a good thing, y’all, and hard for me anyway to imagine that goodness being vanilla. (though it can be for some and that’s great too)

christians haven’t kept old testament holiness codes since the very, very beginning when it was still an open question about whether following the resurrected jesus was something you could do in the synagogue, keeping the rules that were a huge part of jewish identity. jesus and all the disciples were jewish...but how to be jewish and believe the god of israel raised jesus from the dead? that questions is close to the heart of the entire new testament.

but today christians don’t think about the holiness code or markers of jewish identity. more often, in my experience, talk of purity is a way of keeping girls from having sex (boys too in theory) but in evangelicalism at least, teenagers/young adults have as much sex as non-christians and i think they may be more likely to get pregnant perhaps because birth control not an option. (it happened to sarah plalin’s daughter who i think had been a public figure encouraging abstinence. no judgment from me, just an example of what i am talking about)

the song of songs - which had more commentaries devoted to it than any book but genesis for the first 1500 years of the church - is a sex poem about unmarried teenagers. we read it at weddings (it was read at mine) but nowhere is marriage mentioned in the entire book. not sure the word “god” even appears. but the church, like israel before, held it in esteem as perhaps the most mysterious and powerful expression of the intimacy god desires with people (obviously in a metaphorical and not literal sense)

give yourself to your spouse in mutual care and faithfulness, with kindness and respect...i think that’s as close to pure as we can get. and it’s impossible to bat 1000.00. people are just too messy, broken, and needy. it’s inevitable this side of heaven. and i can’t see where purity talk has gotten us - doesn’t end well when people are overeager to claim any mantle of holiness.

good news is, we don’t have to. what holiness we can claim is only that which jesus shares with us. let us grow in self-giving love and throw ourselves with joy on the mercy of god who lets jesus take our place.

this is the first time i’m commented on an online forum. i hope my tone is ok. nothing but love from me to all of you!

just remembered the prostitutes in jesus’ family tree. and the scandal of mary’s pregnancy when the neighbors couldn’t see that holiness was hidden in the scandal!

I agree with you I would like to chat with you on the scriptures