How would you define lust?

I know that lust makes platonic relationships hostile, untrustworthy, jealous, and inconsiderate, which is just plain chaos.

I know that intimacy, love, and relationships are a good thing, and being "of one flesh" is a good thing if within marriage, the essential meaning of marriage. Lust is different from sexual attraction and is different from love.

I understand lustfulness as analogous to to covetousness, which is a disrespect of property rights or an interference with other people's realm of responsibility. Essentially it is improper allegiance to a consensus. Imagination is an essential part of life, but if it is confused with reality or consensus, then it is a descent into madness.

That said, lustful people are still people; I'm one. Engagement, marriage, community, and chivalry each have their own definition of lust.

How do you understand lust and what are you opinions about it?

I don’t know the technical definition of lust or any religion’s stance on it. My own experience has been that physical attraction inspires lust, and that a listy marriage is a beautiful thing.

I think it’s easy to confuse lust for love in the early stages of a relationship. I believe that’s the best reason for taking a relationship slow in the beginning; taking the time to get to know your partner well before indulging in the physical draw to each other.

In my opinion there is no better relationship than one balanced in lust and love.

Lust ignites physical attraction which is normally short term when it is satiated . On the other hand true love can survive longer than lust as it’s not only the physical but a deeper kind. I think lust is a normal human feeling as long as it doesn’t become an obsession. JMO

JanDarling, loved your answer, although I know nothing about a listy marriage.
Lust is it another label for hot steamy fireworks between two people that didn't have the right mindsets for each other. Or just the old hit it and quit it satisfaction. We can come up with many I'm sure.

Arfvedson, I think you need to have sexual attraction to lust after someone.

Integ, I think listy is in the karma sutra
Surely lust is the first attraction then love follows or not.

Integ, I think listy is in the karma sutra
Surely lust is the first attraction then love follows or not.

I think Lust is the need to be satiated.

A lot of people identify it with sex but sex is not the only thing that is lusted.

Religions will vilify lust because it can cause people to do things that break church protocols and disciplines. It is part of the Greed Cycle.

There is a certain amount of lust in everyone.
Consider the term "Lust for Life".

In intimate relationships, sexual attraction is usually initiated from some type of lust. People court one another mainly for the purpose of reproduction. But it feels good too. It feels good to be lusted for as well.
That's because we love being wanted.

Where the problem arises is when someone lusts over the top.
Lust for money.
Lust for power.
Lust for sex.
Lust for justification.

The entire advertising industry uses lust to sell products.
Not necessarily always sexual lust either.


Not really.
A platonic relationship is one that is NOT intimate.
There are many platonic relationships that are based on common lust.
Fandom is a good example. Fans will lust for anything having to do with the subject of their attention.
A work team will lust for their goal.
Your inner circle of friends might lust for adventure.
Many times a platonic relationship might be jeopardized by someone's uncontrolled sexual lust but that is because certain boundaries get crossed by the one doing the lusting.


Lust is a very important part of Love.
It becomes bad if it is not controlled.
Most of us are able to control our selves.
It is only when the amount of lust for one person exceeds that person's tolerance, that a problem arises.
Those problems usually happen when someone has less control over their desires than the other person is comfortable with.
With one person, your lust may be too much.
With another, it may be too little.
The trick is to find the one that matches your level of passion.

Another thing is hormones.
Talking about sexual lust, we must consider the effect of hormones on the level of lust permitted. Teenagers and young adults are often ruled by hormones that geared to want to reproduce.
As we advance in age, we are usually not driven by the need to reproduce as strongly. Many people try to hang on to that feeling. Or, they try to reawaken that feeling they experienced when they were younger because it felt good. Think Mid-life Crisis.


My opinion of lust is that it is a natural human condition.
Its when lust becomes obsessive that it becomes a problem within societies/relationships.
Lust can be controlled. A lot of people do control it.
However, it has been stigmatized because there are also a lot of people that can't or won't control it.

Lust satiates our desires.
Remove it and what's the point of living?

I'll have to look it up later. I'm sure I can find many complex reasonings defining that. Urban Dictionary is a good one.

You could consult the word in the hood to

I just trying to keep it simple and tome took it to another level with many more variables. Good job! I might add. Also touched on greed.

Or as I like to say, jokingly, "WORD ON THE STREET IS !"

That is pretty cool that lust is not a problem in marriage. For me it is the emotional bond, not the physical bond, that makes me lust for them physically and emotionally. It is hard to get to know people because I start to like them too much, and while I don’t act on lust, I know what I want more than I know what they want, which makes it hard for me to form a consensus with them and think considerately about them.
If I’m holding hands with someone it makes me feel connected and satisfied. In my experience dating, lust is a problem and I want to not cause lust in the person I’m with, but do want to know enough about them before going after them. Taking things slow (and not kissing or fondling them, I’ve never done that because everyone knows that is questionable) is a good start. Where I live there is no conventional way of dating and the Nobel Prise question is how does one do that.

Awesome answer :-)
Thanks Tom!

I think that is a common problem most men have anymore. Not being able to read the woman's signals or misreading the woman's signals.
I think this is why a lot of men will wait for the woman to make the first move.
I dated a woman for four months that never made a first move, never indicated any sexual attraction. It was weird. She had other personality issues tho. When I broke it off we talked about it. I asked her why she never gave any indication that she was interested in being intimate? She told me about how her previous lovers treated her badly. I held my tongue because she was extremely emotional and I didn't want to set her off.
Essentially, I was being judged on the actions of others.
I never treated her badly and I did respect her wishes but without the intimacy, something important was missing from our relationship.

Consider the strategy of lust.
Some men go right for the gold.
They barrel thru a woman's desires to satiate their lust.

Its better to show a little and wait for an indication she wants to take it a bit further. The lust builds, gains meaning.
Its just as important to let her set the pace as it is to respect her limitations. It can get frustrating but the results often lead to love.

The key is your own self control and your perception of the signals she gives you.

I think I got it. Learning how to read her signals, letting things be, and self control. Okay

Listful is a better sounding word than lustful. Lust is also an acronym for Leaking Underground Storage Tank, which is a REC (recognized environmental condition). Rhymes with rust.

Many people think the Kama Sutra is about sexual lust but what it is about is fulfilling a partner's sensual desires.
I recommend reading up on tantric sensuality and sexual desire.
I have basically used that technique concerning my sexual expression with women long before I understood or even knew about the discipline.
I have found that most women favorably respond to it.
It gives you both a sense of oneness, er fulfillment that hard lust lacks.
Both soothing and exciting.

Okay cool. Thanks for the advice S. S., :-)

I meant lusty marriage. And I haven’t even had any green beer.

Why should lust be reserved for the uncommitted? Married couples deserve bootie calls too.

I consider balance as optimizing just about anything.

If you don’t kiss her, she may not realize your romantic intentions, but if you get handsy too soon, she will think you’re just after sex.

On your end, if you don’t kiss her, you may not know if your physical attraction is real or idealized. If you get too handsy too soon, your physical ambitions with her could cloud your judgment about the level of care you feel for her.

Walking a middle line can be a challenge, but one you’re usually thankful for in the end. IMO.