What is the point of online friends?
Should they be as supportive as real friends or are they just plastic so you can say "look how many people like me "?
Should online friends support you?
Or should they keep quiet so they don't upset another friend?

Wow, great questions Mikey. One's that I've wondered about as well.


For me, the point of online friends is so I can connect with others. I don't get a chance to get out much and having a few friends is nice. Although with the ones online, you can't go to the movies or hang out in the same way, but it's still nice having one or two people out there that you consider a friend and they you as well.

As far as being supportive, it would be nice, but we can't make anyone "be supportive". I believe real friends(online ones and offline ones) do support each other, and if someone is not supportive of me, then I don't consider them a very good friend. Being supportive doesn't necessarily mean they always agree with me, but that they respect my beliefs and don't turn their backs on me for having certain beliefs. They accept me for who I am, and vise versa.

With keeping quiet so not to upset another friend. I have been guilty of this, mostly because I don't like conflict, more so than not wanting to upset the other friend. It really sucks to be put in a situation where someone will be your friend, so long as you don't associate with those who aren't "their" friend. I see that as childish and controlling. I won't be in that type of friendship where the other decides who I associate with and who I don't.

With so many personalities online, not everyone is going to like everyone. If I comment on someone's thread, supporting what they have to say...it doesn't mean I'm not supporting my friend who has different views. It's not about them. It's about me relating to what I have read...or disagreeing with what I have read.

The whole online thing for me is not about how many people like me. It's about learning and growing as an individual. It's about learning to interact again with the outside world, learning to be a better friend, and if I make one or two friends along the way...that's an added bonus!

To me, and the only person I can ever represent is me.
Online entities are enlightening.

I really don't get support from those relationships because my ego requires very little support anymore.

I find other's opinions and comments enlightening and they give me something different to think about. What is funny is its not always what they say, but more of how they say it that leads me to thinking in ways that I usually don't think on my own. I causes me to consider views that are different from my own.

To me, friendship is very personal and an active in-person relationship where we share moments of our lives together in reality.

Online, I see disembodied personalities with a visual reference from the pictures they post. I can identify with most of those personalities but I don't need them to agree with my views. Sometimes the most enlightenment is gained when we don't agree. It broadens my horizons.

I had a time in my life when online friends were important to me. Facebook was addicting in such a way. I realized that I had 'friends' that I had never met and only knew what they said on facebook. I started deleting 'friends'. I removed all 'friends' from facebook but kept my account for only 'family'.

Facebook started to assault me with recommendations to get more friends. It got really irritating. I moved my facebook notifications to spam and removed all my personal data, My family knows me. Now, I never go to facebook, I don't care about it.

On M2, I get messages of friend requests all the time. I look at who is trying to friend me and decline in most cases. Only those that I have had discussions with in these forums are even considered. As it is, I have very few "friends" here. Less than five. I do not send out friend requests either. Not because I am unfriendly but because I have different ideas about what constitutes friendship.

There are personalities here that I value. There are many forum posts that are enlightening and some that are humorous. None are actual friends. If I go offline they are gone. If I find someone special, I will not be on any dating sites. Chances of me meeting anyone here in real life and bonding as friends is very slim.

At Best, these online personalities that I interact with are "friendly". I try to be "friendly" as well.

I understand the concept of online friendships and I respect others need to have many online friends. I still gain value from online interactions but I don't need a label to respect others.

Thank you for your comments tom. Very enlightening, I also agree.

Hi pisces, thank you for your input. You make some very valid points. It is a difficult one for some. In this modern age of everything online
This is the only access some have with communities.

'friend' like 'love' has been used so broadly that it is hardly special for many.

For me, I don't count many as 'friends', online or off. When I do , it means they are there for me in good times and bad times and that they can count on me to do the same. That may manifest as having a compassionate eye when we are texting or messaging back and forth with which to give sound advice or support OR it could manifest in a compassionate EAR when we communicate in person.

The current use of 'friend' on social media, as far as I can tell, only means both parties have an interest in either the other party or in accumulating 'friends'.

I have watched movies with people in other countries on skype and one online community I admin at sponsors an online Movie-Chat website where we all get together and riff on movies.
http://www.watch2gether.com/rooms/rifftown-0xxtuasu2r66cbmmvd
It even features Video Icon Feeds with your live video as your icon.
We can type or we can talk together.


Agree but I am so different in my beliefs I've learned not to 'depend' on other's support of me. Reading/Writing is a limited interaction, friendship is encompassing.


My health prevents me from socially interacting with people in real life. I am homebound most of the time. I have no real friends but I have many personalities that I can identify with online. It most people's view, they are 'online friends'.
In my view they are disembodied personalities that I can identify with. If someone were to actually meet me and get to know me they would find that I am a good friend. Who wants to come over and have a good meal and watch some movies, listen to some music or just sit around and talk? Nobody, that's who.

My online personality is exactly the same as my off-line in person personality. I can't say that about every online personality but I still value them. There is a lot of wisdom to be gained.

Thank you msharmony, good points.

You're welcome Mikey. And thank you, it's a good thought provoking topic

That's cool about the movies Tom, I wasn't aware you could do that. Thanks!

I hear what you're saying about not depending on others for support. I don't as well. It's nice though when you get it.

As far as who would come over for dinner, a movie, and to hang out....I wonder about that too. I guess part of the problem is everyone is so far away. It definitely gives you an idea of who's really a friend if they actually do that, when you're in the same area. Some say "Oh yeah, sure"...some mean it, others don't

If I lived in the same town as you....I would! You'd probably end up doing most of the talking, but it would be interesting and nice.

I was writing a long response but it got all winded. So here is all I got to say about online friends...

I love my all Mingle2 friends almost as much as I love cheesecake.

Lovely rosie thank you.
And yes, cheesecake is virtually impossible to beat

Beautiful rosie....I love that!

I know, right

I'm glad you like it, pisces

Ditto back at cha!
Yes, I have diverse topic interests. Plus I have no problem being entertaining.

mzrosie, that is so nice! I only wish it were true.

The truth is, what we read from online posts may not be a natural response.
See, Just like you stated

we have the ability to edit our thoughts before they are submitted.
Some write contradictory to their views to 'fit' their intended audience. It happens in real life too but online you have the ability to unsay something by just deleting it before you post it or using the editing feature. In real life, once you say something, it can not be unsaid.
In real life you get immediate feedback for clarification. Online, the only feedback you get is the response that is written and posted.
Granted some people post exactly what they mean but most respond as they think appropriate to the intended audience.

You can never be completely sure the person you have 'friended' online is who or what you think. Not only that, You don't know for sure if they are laughing with you or at you, crying for you or their own dismal outlook on what you shared.

The only thing you have to go by is what they wrote, which can be a completely edited or fabricated response. The assurances needed for friendship can only be gained by in-person interactions over time. Again, I value many of the online personalities I meet but none can actually be friends.

Tom, I want to believe that my Mingle2 friends are not faking it.
Cheers

EDITED:
I also want to believe that my Mingle2 friends are laughing with me and not at me.

I know, so do I.
Personally, I just try to consider all the possibilities I can think of.
There is one consideration that is really far out in left field.
That there is an AI that is the internet itself and every response is that AI responding, that there is nobody on the other end of the keyboard. Told you it was out in left field but its not a new concept. I have read science fiction that explores that very idea.

There is also real-life examples of that concept being played out by cyber-crimes and hackers. You never REALLY know if who you are online talking with is actually who they portend to be. We take their honesty on faith. The only way to be sure is to meet them face to face in reality.

A computer AI has already passed the Touring Test. That means that when tested with other humans, the judging panel could not tell which response was human or machine.



A computer program called Eugene Goostman, which simulates a 13-year-old Ukrainian boy, is said to have passed the Turing test at an event organized by the University of Reading.


The fact that Cleverbot Eugene Goostman can cheat the test is significant.

Granted this is recent news so I highly doubt online personalities are anything except human ... at this time. But it could be possible.

As a fellow human being I too have faith that the personalities I meet and interact with online are human but I also consider that they may not be honest in all responses. Any one or more could actually be a cop at a desk, a pervert or any other possibility.

Illusions can be projected by ANYONE and anyone can be deluded by ruse.

Let's keep the faith burning!