Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America, Kentuckians, Carolinians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred to as "HILLBILLIES." You must now refer to them as APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS.

And furthermore.

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a "BREASTED AMERICAN."

2. She is not "EASY" - She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."

3. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a "LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."

4. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a "PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."

5. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE."

6. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST PROVIDER."

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a "LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."

2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."

3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He "INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS"

4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION."

5. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."

6. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants - It's "REAR CLEAVAGE."

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST:

"STUPID PEOPLE" are now just "AWARENESS IMPAIRED."

Haha, very clever...

2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."

I do not consider this PC, as it is racist, saying white people can't dance. My cousin is living proof that caucasian people CAN dance. I think the correct PC term would be rythmically challenged maybe?

However "STUPID PEOPLE" are now just "AWARENESS IMPAIRED." makes up for your lack of PC terminology. haha I love that one.

Hmmm... I think that's an unfair statement as well, as I'm about as white as you can get and I'm a drummer for two well-known bands. Okay, well known where I'm from. But nonetheless... I'm white and have rhythm.

My ex used to tease me about this. I get lost ALL THE TIME. When I moved to Minneapolis, the first thing I did after I got moved into my apartment was to go out and buy an atlas. I've used it at least twice a month since I've been here (a year!) I would never cop to being lost, though. I would always insist that I was having an adventure.

Too funny.

i missed you kater

Awareness impaired...thas me!!!!

Kate...

VERY funny. I hope that you and Jessie had a WONDERFUL Thanksgiving!!!!

Kater, only you could find something like this