I am a pretty independant, strong personality lady. A lot of men say that is what they are looking for, but when I dont call all the time and I dont need to see them all week, they are not loving it, So I am confused. I do show men I am interested and I am very observant over the things they like, and make sure I do the small things, but does having a strong personality and independant women actually turn you off?

Not if the look in your eyes is warm and attentive and your smile unforced and your words clear and graceful.

Is that too much to ask for ? ( in general...nothing personal or sarcastic here)

depends upon how strong a personality and how independent the lady is. generally speaking, not pointed directly at you, if the lady is so strong as to seem domineering, that is a turn off. Independent? if to an excess, then it is a turn off because men in general feel a need to be the protector and provider. If those two items are removed, then the guy is out of there...lol...just part of basic human psych.

nothing wrong with women being strong and independent ..as long as they dont come off being *****y and butch..jmo

In all honesty I see it both ways. On one side it's VERY nice to have that constant affection and companionship, but on the other hand I would love to just be independant a see each other when you have a chance to. Then you don't feel so tied down and when you do actually meet up, it's all that much better.

I know it doesn't really answer you question, but you know, today's man is not all as single minded as the stereotype makes us out to be. Really I'm just trying to say maybe that is another aspect that you need to try and read from men.

As for me though, a compromise would be, if she called, I would do all I can to be there for her, but as well I would want the same in return. You just can't start off the bat basing your lives around each other though. If you are trying to start a committed relationship with someone, it's all about compromise in the start.

Dont get me wrong, I love spending time with the man I am dating, I am just not a real Clingy person. I just get confused on what they want, they say they dont want the clingy type but when they dont get it they want it lol I am not going to change who I am but it would be nice to know that men know what they want also.:O)

it is also good to make your opinion known from the begining of the relationship. If he calls, return his call at your earliest convenience and make him understand that you don't mean no harm by returning the call late.

i dont look at things as being clingy..nothing personal just cant relate to that word sort makes me think of wussy from a guys perspective,but i would think that if you actually enjoy being around that person than you would want to spend more time with them and the time spent together would not be looked at as if one were being clingy but yet enjoyment because it was shared ..all about the perspective i suppose... that and finding the right person...

it can be very difficult to find a comfortable level of
independence/interdependence i think. very tricky at times.
i also am a very independent person. but when in a
special relationship situation i find myself relying very
strongly on that person. now i need to have someone who is
an independent thinker - and i love strong women...but if
i didn't feel they are relying on me as much as i am relying
on them emotionally then it just didn't work.

i think many people want someone who thinks for themselves
and has a great head on their shoulders but chooses to
depend on their partner emotionally and is free in showing
that dependence as a special thing to them. if there is a
big mismatch in that department then intimacy languishes.
i will go further. if there is little sense of mutual
dependence then there basically no intimacy and by my way
of thinking no real relationship. it is just two independent
people who cannot join to become a couple in that special
intereliant sense.

Quality over quantity. When you are with a guy, just be extra attentive if you are unable to see him on a regular basis. And the guy should be extra attentive to you also....works both ways.