I used to believe in soul mates. I do not anymore. And, not because I am bitter or jaded when it comes to relationships. Actually, I'm just the opposite. Both relationships and being single have their pros and cons and I think both can be wonderful times in a person's life. But, over the last 3 or 4 years I have stopped believing in the idea of "the one" or the person "meant for me". For a deeply spiritual person I am also pretty logical and I think that love and a good relationship is more about meeting someone, falling in love and making a choice to be together and to create a life together. I think you must have things in common and be willing to compromise in areas you don't agree. I don't think there is only person for everyone. That's not to say you won't find a person you spend the rest of your life with, it just means there isn't only person who can ever fill that role.

What do you think?

I believe you are absolutely correct, not just the quote.. but your entire post. I don't believe either that there is two people "made" for one another. It's about self sacrifice and dedication.. boils down to love. If someone loves the other, they will bend and twist for the other at times, as will the spouse. And in the end it will all work out. No two people are just going too hit it off and be absolutely perfect for each other in every way of the relationship without bending in and giving up something they want to do, want in general, or anything of such. Just boils down to who you love more, you and your specific happiness, or your spouses happiness.... Which again routes back to "love" for your spouses happiness should over come any selfish or personal happiness, as in you should receive more happiness from them being happy then specifically the happiness you would have received from doing or getting what ever it may be in the specific time.

Soulmates come about when the conditions for unconditional love are there.

Dearest Ruth. A few months ago, I would have agreed. I'm too old, too set in my ways. My dream girl has eluded me and I should just accept it.

I met a light. I saw it in the dark, like a diamond covered, hidden. I looked at this diamond for some time, admired it and it's beauty. I was constantly struggling with the possibility that someone special might be there, just beyond my reach. So this beautiful person and I made a connection. We realized that the odds, distance and cultural differences, were daunting. We still agreed that, though an entire day seperated us, we should make an attempt. She lives in the future, I live in the past. Now I can't start my day without her posts and whatsapps.
We are building a mystery, me and my beautiful tigress. I met her here on Mingle. We finally talked and all we did was laugh! So can this happen for you Ruth? ... only the Creator knows. Sometimes you have to give up on a dream, bury it in the burial ground of your ancestors and say it is finished. So maybe there is hope for us all. (((((((Eva)))))))

I was afraid my post might produce just this reaction. I'll state again, I am not worried about finding love. This post is about the idea of soul mates and whether people believe that there is one person and one person only who they are meant to be with and who they can find happiness with. So, with that clarification, I am very happy you feel you have found that person and I'll take your answer as a "yes, you believe in soul mates".

((((Rob)))

I don't know what to say. ..but I know I am crying.
We hope for future ...not knowing what will it be.
First time..we talked.. I just knew.. we are soulmate. Hard to explain....
It is just there...

I love you , Rob.....

Its nonsense to believe there is only one person for each as the chances of anyone meeting one person and just one in 5 billion is not possible statistically. Having said that, there are many people who could be soul mates for life, for a specific time and any other time frame as the important part is reciprocal compatibility in intellectual, emotional physical, spiritual, sexual and personality together these form a matrix from which a great match is created and then nourished. So while the number is much greater than one, how else would people find their significant other? but it still requires a sizeable sample to find the specific persons who are our best matches and this is sufficient to make the task difficult if not sometimes painful just to discover one of the potentials and the courage to seek them out.

Luv you too babe ,Eva....

I still believe in soulmates. I believe that God has a plan for everyone of us and everything has a reason and purpose. In God's time he will give us the desires of our hearts. I have loved before and failed , I thought of forever but it never happened yet I didn't stop to believe in true love, to find my soulmate someday, somewhere , somehow, I know God has someone special in store for me in his time I have lead an organized life before, too careful not to make mistakes yet i stumble and fall. Trying to make plans and organize the life you want to happen yet why are there hindrances, trials and challenges, circumstances that are beyond your control? It only means that we don't totally own and control our lives...... if something is meant to happen it will happen in God's will. All we have to do is wait and hope. Never lose your faith....dream, believe and hope

I guess I don't look at my past relationships as failures. Just because a relationship ends doesn't mean you weren't meant to be with that person for the time you were with them. I may not be with children's father, but I am forever grateful to him for the beautiful children he gave me. Only the two of us could make the children we did. I have loved and been loved and will most likely love again. But I think by saying there is only person meant for us we invalidate all the other people who were meaningful in our lives. What about the widow or widower who find love again?

Well relationship means adaptation, overlook and develop with lot of love and trust. A soulmate is a person who can adapt to us, overlook our flaws, develop us to grow and still loves us with all their heart. Ofcourse we should also be a soulmate to them to make a prefect couple or as they say soulmates. I have seen people made for each other and I totally believe in love fairy tales and soulmates. There is a person for whom you would love to change yourself, adapt and overlook all it matters is whether you find that person or settle with someone you met before.

I agree.. through life we can 'fall in love' many times... feel a connection with another 'soul-mate'.. there's more than 1 person out there for 1 person... if you feel that it happens to you, once or many times, that is awesome.
I mean, what is/was a lifetime anyway.. its only in the last 50 years or so that we're surviving into our 70's/80's and older.. those old pioneers died in their 40's.. sometimes 20 years can be a lifetime.

Really good point.

'Soul mates' sells valentines.
Buncha hooey.

We all fit together for a reason.

quote,unquote.. True love comes more than once in a lifetime.

It's possible that there's one person who understands you better than any other.
The term soulmate,is spiritual.The soul is a spirit being,possessing soul-like qualities . Other terms like roommate,playmate etc. There exist a much deeper understanding of the word soulmate.

Yes truelove is more than the mutual love shared by man and woman over a season or seasons of dating and relationships.
Truelove is given or received by words or actions,by a brother or sister,an acquaintance or stranger,and sometimes even an enemy.

I think people can believe what they want.

And no matter what it is, other people can prove that belief (to their own sensibilities) as false.

I think people have to continuously update their beliefs in order to justify their decisions, to make sure they are as consistent as possible with their self image of a "good" person, which allows them to go after what they really want (as appetite driven group/herd animals), which offers the greatest pleasure and validation and the least amount of risk, effort, and/or cost (financial, emotional, mental, social, etc.).

I believe there's one person that is the perfect fit for the phase of life you're in at this very moment.
That person may or may not be the right fit for the rest of your life. But they are now.

If you look back on all your ex partners and even friends you've had throughout life, you can see that those people disappeared from your life as soon as the mutual goal/purpose for that relationship had gone and/or was fulfilled.
And that's how it should be, because then we move on and find other friends or another partner who can give us -and we them- what we need in life at that very moment.
It's like a wave, not a straight line. This is also why I do not believe in monogamy. By which I mean being forced by societal norms and values to stay with the same partner for the rest of your life, even when you have nothing to offer one another anymore.
That totally clashes with personal growth and development, even with Soul growth and development. You didn't come here to get stuck because of a relationship. Relationships should nurture you, stimulate you, and support you. Not hold you back in life.
So in that sense I'm all for breaking up and finding someone new when a relationship has run its course.

And yes, I do believe wholeheartedly that there is one such person for you out there, for this moment in time, for the current phase of your life. And again, that may or may not last forever.

All these experiences will help you get ready for the real one and only true other half (Twin Ray). Most of us won't get there this life btw because most ppl simply aren't that far with their personal growth yet. And that's not a problem either. Doesn't mean you cannot be ultimately happy. Almost like: When you can't get any higher than the 10th rung of the ladder, you can be totally exalted about being there with someone else who's on that 10th rung too. You will not miss what's on the 15th rung, because that's beyond your scope. Or: if you've never eaten a T-bone steak, you won't miss it, because you don't know what it tastes like. And you'll be perfectly happy with beef Bourguignon.
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