And they say women are difficult

There is a difference between being shallow and not being physically attracted to someone.

If that is how he feels, then that is how he feels. Anyway, what do people think the purpose of a bra is?

..not about me.. I'm more of an *** man... you got the booty I don't need the hooties..lmas

Sucks to be him. All women with medium to large breasts are eventually going to get saggy - what's he going to do then?? Try to date young, small breasted women his whole life?

For his own sake I think he should learn to love mature ****. Anyone can do it, with time and exposure.

Yeah, I was just thinking that there are all sizes of women in the world. it's inevitable that a woman will sag a little, at least if she has a larger breast size and especially if she is very active. You have to accept it.

and everyone says it's the guy thats shallow... but was he stuffing socks down his pants to enhance his image? sure it seems a bit shallow, but no one is asking why is the woman wearing this bra that shows a false pretense of what she is? seems to be a double standard here... she wears this to enhance her image, this gets upset when he doesn't like what he see's in "real" time...

everyone of you people that says how shallow he is, is just as shallow and superficial as you're saying he is...

Well.. there seems to be a lot of pros and cons to this topic..lol.. I think there has been too much fixation on saggy boobs...lol..
The underlying sentiment behind the topic.. is !..how does he tell her ,he no longer wishes to be in a relationship with her... because he can't deal with saggy boobs... I believe this would fit nicely with the always tell the truth topic..lol.. yes I can see how that would go over very well...
Umm.. my dearest girlfriend I think you're great and we would be a match in every way... but I must let you go because I can't deal with your saggy boobs....
that is really the most difficult part in this scenario...
How do you be true to your own needs wants and Desires in a partner..
Without being hurtful.. how do you be honest with yourself. And at the same time... not trying to be brutally honest..
With the other person... nobody likes to hear that they are not perfect..

.. thank you...

Judging a persons entire value based on shallow information as well as having absolutely no desire and/or capability to delve for more.


The struggle sounds more like it's just part of the process of settling and very little to do with "shallow."

Otherwise he's just the "nice guy."
The veneer of being a "nice guy" paying lip service to "nice guy" ideals like paying attention to her and who she is so he can say "she is amazing.. she has everything going for her" when in reality he never really paid that much attention to her, and he couldn't really define why she is amazing to any depth, or what she has going for her that she values rather than what he values for her.

For all I know this isn't about being "shallow" but about "okay, I fulfilled the role of nice guy and got laid, and no one can judge me a bad guy, a player, an a-hole, a user, because I stuck around for 3 weeks!...but since I got laid I got what I want, now it's time to sabotage it and get out, so grab whatever flaw I can find and milk it for what I can to justify getting out."

And this "I think the same thing I feel horrible about it" is more feeling horrible about banging someone and leaving, he's just transferring it to something lesser.

For what's the bigger crime? Leading a woman on, using her, and dumping her? Or it not working out because of a flaw in attraction?
On some level he knows his actions are "bad," but he can rationalize it into a lesser crime, flagellate himself for it now to a lesser extent for the lesser crime, so when it's over he doesn't have to feel bad anymore, plus possibly feel "good" about it, because he's a nice guy, he tried, it didn't work out, he went through some drama, and survived so is stronger and better, thereby justifying him doing the exact same thing to the next person.

I don't know the guy.
Maybe he has a history of dating women for a while, banging them, and dumping them, then victimizing himself as compensation for the perception of victimizing women.
Maybe he doesn't.
But that's SOP for a lot of guys that go through this kind of "struggle" with "shallowness."

He doesn't have to give her a boob complex by telling her exactly why. He should just tell her that he had a change of heart...period.

you asked what constitutes being shallow?

The bit about breastfeeding is not true. I sometimes get the feeling you have something against women who've had children since you so often seem to have the need to knock them. There's plenty of women who've had (plural) babies & breastfed and still have perky breasts and bodies that look like an 18 yrs old's, and a gazillion women who've never had babies and have sagged boobs.

The bit about smaller breasts that sag, very true! Just look at naked boobs you see in movies. Usually small breasts, sometimes very small, and most of the time sagged like you wouldn't believe. And most of these women are in their 20s!
So it's nothing to do with age either. I think it's mostly genes, or maybe a matter of not having worn decent bras or a combination.

Learn to love the sag!!!

Sag is beautiful!

and it could have been avoided in the first place if she wears a regular bra...

Yeah, that could be hurtful. But for some people it would actually be good to know. Better to know he has a boob problem rather than be left worrying about there being something wrong with her.

If a woman didn't want to date me cause my nuts were too saggy, and told me to my face, I'd see very clearly that the problem is her and not me. I'd think that I dodged a bullet there.

I think this entire thing about it being "false pretense to wear a bra" is utter b0ll0cks. She's wearing a bra, a garment all women wear. So just cos someone's boobs are sagging, she should stop wearing a normal garment cos otherwise men will be offended?
Sorry ...
Putting socks in your pants is faking it, cos it's pretending there's something there you ain't even got. If you can nicely fill up a bra, it's still your own boobs. Faking it would be what most advise, which is putting silicone balloons in 'em. And oddly enough that would be okay?
Ppl are weird ...

I think if you cannot get over a physical 'flaw' of an alleged partner, it's best to call it quits. But no need to knock someone else in the process, especially not when it touches someone where it hurts most: their sexuality & femininity (or masculinity if it's a bloke)

lol if you really want to get down to the nitty gritty. ..many many women you meet will have a few things fake about them. This is the way life is now. El Natural just don't exist anymore ...women are giving the men the eye candy they crave

i stand by my statement.. regular bras don't push your boobs into your chin...

..ok. so him being honest about how he feels.. gets him in hot water... because he is being honest..
About how he feels...
But now he should not be honest with her about his reasons for leaving...
Because that would be hurtful to her..
But it's okay to be hurtful to him because he particularly does not like a woman who has boobs that sag down to her knees.. think 2 tennis balls in socks...nice...